OK--first things first, so I'm a little bit old school. And I don't particularly care to think about Wesley Clark of FISA today.
To wit, one of the first rap concerts I ever attended was in 1986; at the
Sun Dome in Tampa, Florida. It was headlined by Run DMC, although
there were four acts overall.
The other three were Whodini [anyone remember 'Friends' or 'The Freaks
Come Out at Night' or, my personal favorite 'I'm A Ho'?], The Beastie Boys [who opened and, I believe, only
had two songs: 'She's Crafty' and 'Girls'] and LL Cool J.
I mention this because: [1] I am extremely old;
and, [2] heard the LL Cool J song "Radio" played on the local "oldies"
rock station [I know--rock? but that's for another time] last night.
So, feeling incredibly bored and slightly nostalgic last night, I culled
my eight favorite LL Cool J song lyrics from his catalogue [I'm using
that term relatively loosely].
I'll list these in reverse order [and would love to hear anyone's
comments if they feel I have snubbed a truly awful LL Cool J lyric].
[8]Suckas on my jock when I walk down the block I really don't care if you're jealous or not
[7]You lied about the lies that you lied about You even lied to your aunt when you went down south
[6]I'm the type of guy to make her say, "Why you're illin, Bee?" ...You're the type of guy to say, "My lower back is killin me"
[5]You can scratch my back, we'll get cozy and huddle I'll lay down my jacket so you can walk over a puddle
[4]See something's smellin' fishy and they say it's you All I know is that you made it with the whole damn crew
[3]You're the type of guy that gets suspicious I'm the type of guy that says, "The puddin is delicious"
[2]I'm the type of guy to cold put on a pamper You're the type of guy to say, "What you talkin bout?"
I'm the type of guy to leave my drawers in your hamper
[1]Cut Creator's good, Cool J. is good-good
You bring the wood pecker, I'll bring the wood!
Indeed.