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Obama grants Cato Minor the first question


"In times like these it is difficult to not write satire"

Juvenal







Fresh from his latest triumph through the streets of the capital, Obama ascended the Ara Pacis for an audience with the hallowed senate.  

As he stood before a freshly lacquered rostrum an adoring crowd clicked their awe.  Flanked with a victorious eagle standard and the prosperous insignia of the empire, the august Obama opened with a somber call upon the young empire to cast differences aside and unite in this hour of great need.Then the young leader announced his intention to accept questions from the gathered dignitaries.  

Citing his prerogative as potentate, he magnanimously chose to award the first question to the esteemed Cato Minor.   

Renowned throughout the empire for his fortitude under Macedonian tyranny,  Cato the younger was the leader of a faction of boisterous senators hailing from rural southern provinces. 

As the lean and gnarled Cato rose to take his question a tuft of ashen hair fell across his face, betraying his bare skull.  Unwavering, he peered up to the young leader.  

Recalling the legionaries that revered him throughout the world, the battle hardened Cato was unintimidated by the grandiloquent young emperor.  For he had responsibilities beyond that of mere leadership.  

A glint of pride escaped his eye as an ingenious question occurred.  One that would not only show the wizened man's wisdom, but would swiftly strike down the callow lord.  With great anticipation he sprung his question: 


"Whilst our armies are mired in the deserts of Parthia, why lord do you squander our limited sesterce on jeweled chariots?  Chariots so festooned in riches that they are equal in cost with the finest of your galleons?"  


"Oh tell us, Augustus, How will these fine Chariots win us Parthia?!?"





The young magistrate took the question in stride as he formulated his answer.

"Yes esteemed Cato, I fully agree with you, these chariots that you ordered for me are ridiculously gaudy."  

"We the empire are better off for your wisdom.  I support your reasonable desire to order me something more utilitarian, I assure you my servants will help you"




14 Comments

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I love this post! More please....

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Frankly, I have never had a helicopter before. But I told gates this one seems fine to me. hahahahaahaha

Now this is a different Cato from the one in the Pink Panther, right?

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hehehhee.....recommended!!

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Thanks for the truthiness and the laugh!

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Oh, I forgot Saladin. It is not even noon here yet but you win the Dayly Blog of the day Award, given to all of you from all of me.

I had five years of Latin. Between your fantasy, your history, your metaphor and that silly question from McCain yesterday, this is really good!!!!

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Wow, thanks Dickday! I am honored.

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Congratulations Sal. Great stuff - looking forward to the sequel... !

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Everytime I see McCain I am reminded of that teeny tiny slice on the pie chart showing the miniscule portion of the federal budget comprised by earmarks....

McCain is all about that teeny tiny slice.

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McCain is all about:

"Damn! I could have been riding in the helicopter! Oh, how I wish I had that helicopter. That's a problem of national concern, that I do not have that helicopter! If I had that helicopter, who cares if the economy tanks?!?! I would fly all around just being great! I'ld look kinda like this with my hair, cause I like riding around with my head out the window and my tongue flailing in the breeze just past my ear! I would be the picture of my favorite President, George W. Bush as he flew over the Katrina catastrophe. Yes, I could be very PResidential, you know. I ran for President a couple of times and I'm about as good at running for President and I was a pilot. I've gone down in flames several times at both."

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HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA! That was good, GZap.

Saladin...great satire. :o)

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Yes, I could be very PResidential, you know. I ran for President a couple of times and I'm about as good at running for President and I was a pilot. I've gone down in flames several times at both."

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That Cato guy really gets around. I remember when he was helping out the Green Hornet.

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LOL. FAb!!!

Like your nym too. Really. ;)

[and a fellow admirer of Dune...]

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I am so glad you posted this. I thought Obama was at the top of his form with that response and have been wondering if anyone else caught that. And you know Johnny boy was sitting there for at least an hour savoring his little moment of glory, cutting the pres. He was just beaming when he got up, knowing everyone was going to be thinking how clever johnny before he even sat down. Only to be crushed, just absolutely crushed, ONCE AGAIN! Jeeze didn't he just spend 6 months getting schooled?
Your post was great, thanks.

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Saladin

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