"It climbed just one spot, and only because of a revision of the previous report by the Commonwealth Fund. Because of, in part, too many overweight children, cigarette smoking adults and people who avoid doctor visits for a variety of reasons, the state still ranks among the very worst, at 48th.

"The fund, a private foundation pushing for a national health-care overhaul, released the assessment today. Only Louisiana, Oklahoma and Mississippi fared worse thanArkansas among the states and Washington, D.C."

We "edged up!" Don't you love it? Here's the part I like best. The reason our quality of health care down here is so bad, is because our children are fat, we smoke too much and we don't like to go to the doctor. It's all our fault, don't you see. We, after all, are the "consumers" of health care and we choose not to consume as much as we need.

Wait a minute. Wait just a damned minute. That's what we're supposed to do, isn't it? Consume less health care? You bet. The health care system would be sound if only health care consumers would consume less health care. After all, that's the reasoning behind higher co-pays and lower caps and individual health savings accounts. Make consumers pay more so they'll use less and health care will improve.

So I say the Commonwealth Fund has it backwards and the Arkansas Dem-Gaz headline should read:

Arkansas and 3 Other States Lead In Health Care Improvement

"Arkansas, Louisiana, Oklahoma and Mississippi lead the way in reducing the utilization of health care providers. 'Our citizens are doing their part to make the health care system healthier,' said Corporate Blanche Lincoln, announcing the latest findings from the Commonwealth Fund that show Arkansans among the leaders in avoiding health care.

"Linked arm-in-arm with the Board Chairman and CEO of Arkansas Blue Cross Blue Shield, Corporate Blanche went on to thank Walmart, another Arkansas-based corporation, for their sustained efforts in driving down health care costs by discouraging the use of health care. 'If we keep this up,' Lincoln said, 'our corporations will become more competitive on the global stage and our health care consumers will see that curbing consumption is good for the economy.'

"Mark Pryor was unavailable for comment, because they keep him in the back room with the bibles and away from modern technologies like recording devices."