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Yes or No.
Do you prefer really short, one sentence blogs.... or really long, boring, 7 pagers?
Yes, or No.
- quinn
P.S. I am writing this blog under duress.
P.P.S. No, not dress, duress.
P.P.P.S. Though it is my girlfriend Mildred who is making me write this post.
P.P.P.P.S. Originally, I had some really cool YouTube videos that I wanted to attach, but the hitting dancing was pretty heavy duty.
P.P.P.P.P.S. And also, butt secks.
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Butt sects.
You are perfect.
Your blogs are perfect.
That is all.
February 3, 2009 12:23 AM | Reply | Permalink
but, but...its not about politics...is that legal?
February 3, 2009 4:09 PM | Reply | Permalink
Everything somehow relates to politics, stilli, cuz politics is part of everything. Clubs, Schools, neighborhoods, families, you name it. There's no way you can ever do a post here, no matter how humorous or silly, that does not - somehow - related to politics.
JMVHO here.
February 3, 2009 4:13 PM | Reply | Permalink
Just vote NO on 7.
Thank You. Very Much.
February 3, 2009 12:33 AM | Reply | Permalink
That will be $5.
February 3, 2009 1:16 AM | Reply | Permalink
I'm still waiting, ya cheapskate bastard. Look. I've explained it before. See those vertical black lines, running just to the left and right of these comments? Well, you wanna run an ad inside 'em, that's MY turf. And it's gonna cost you $5.
(So get this. I cut this deal Marshall, and I get the primo space in here, right? Anyway, I convinced him that he was getting MORE space than me, and the schmuck took it! Like anyone's gonna read the crap ads out on the edge of the page! So now he's stuck out there in the boonies, broke, and he comes whining to ME, wanting a mention in the blog! "Hey," I says, "Sure! We're pals, right?" But I'm tellin' ya, just between you & me, what an ultramaroon!)
But like I said. $5. Pony up, padre.
February 3, 2009 9:22 AM | Reply | Permalink
Was it duress or undress? I'm think I'm seein' some swinging things...Mildred...make him put his clothes back on!
BTW...when I can understand what you're talking about, which is getting to be more often (OMG am I learning "quinn-speak?) you absolutely crack me up!
Thanks for lightening up the mood!
February 3, 2009 3:59 PM | Reply | Permalink
There's a reason why the men in our clan have to wear ankle-length kilts, baby!
P.S. If you find yourself feeling that you "understand" more of these blogs, my advice is to run - don't walk - to your nearest hospital. The brain scans are relatively painless nowadays, and the series of light "shocks" they'll administer are not at all harmful to your long-term health. Thereafter, the appearance & comprehensibility of future blogs should return to their "normal" state - i.e completely incoherent. ;-)
February 3, 2009 5:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
Just submit a voucher to the Diocese. They know I'm good for it. 'Course, they may not know about that little junket to Laughlin - man, did the holy water flow!
February 3, 2009 11:24 PM | Reply | Permalink
i like exciting adventures seven pages long with lances and swords and ogres and steeds and
of course as far as reading give me a page or two with some cites or links or thought or something
But the best are when q rants for awhile
February 3, 2009 12:45 AM | Reply | Permalink
Almost entirely.
February 3, 2009 1:03 AM | Reply | Permalink
On the butte sects?
February 3, 2009 1:17 AM | Reply | Permalink
If you're going to have sex on a butte it's a good idea to bring an air mattress or a very heavy blanket. Those ancient rocky protuberances can be hard on the back and knees. I read that in hints from Heloise.
February 3, 2009 9:19 AM | Reply | Permalink
Its early but Mark you receive the award for Dayly line of the site given from all of me.
Hints from Heloise, well that is just tops in a context of buttes anyway.
hahahahahahhahah
February 3, 2009 10:51 AM | Reply | Permalink
DD that makes my day. I've secretly been hoping against hope that I'd win that award someday.
February 3, 2009 11:53 AM | Reply | Permalink
Hey Dick, how about a prize for our luck winner MARKG8?
Sure thing quinn! Well Mark, it looks like you've won a FABULOUS, all-expenses-paid (mandatory) TWO week holiday (oooooh) in beautiful... Kandahar Province, Afghanistan! (ohhhhhhhh....)
And MORE! Your companion (mandatory) will be the lovely.....
RENAYE!!!! (gaggggggggh....)
And THAT'S NOT ALL! Because there's also, free, twice-daily (mandatory).... butte secks!
Lesson? Don't trust dick.
February 3, 2009 2:15 PM | Reply | Permalink
UM, can I just take the cash? I'm not sure but I don't think they even have any buttes in Afghanistan. I hear the Taliban blew 'em all up. Even given the unlikely possibility of Karsai's government or coalition forces building one especially for us or simply blowing off the top of one of the mountains we would surely be killed within hours of entering the country once word got around that we possessed a heavy blanket or an air mattress. Those items are both not only in great demand in that benighted land, but by law merely possessing one or the other is also considered a criminal offense against Allah according to both the previous and current regimes. While a certain sense of adventure can be added to any holiday where you're targeted for death by the locals the enjoyment factor would be severely diminished if you are actually dragged out of your hiding place and bludgeoned to death in a back alley.
Besides when it comes to vacation destinations Kandahar Province isn't much different than the Red River Valley, sans the free beer renaye gets from food stamps. While I'm sure she'd make a delightful travel companion and the most gracious of guests for our hosts I'm afraid renaye would most surely decline unless she can acquire the gallons of cheap whiskey that make her the charming bon vivant we've come to know on this board.
February 3, 2009 3:44 PM | Reply | Permalink
"Charming bon vivant"....
Beautiful. ;-)
February 3, 2009 5:32 PM | Reply | Permalink
And by charming bon vivant I mean raging alcoholic. If that isn't a direct translation then chalk it up to my French never being what it used to be.
February 3, 2009 6:14 PM | Reply | Permalink
YOU STARTED YOUR RESPONSE WITH "UM!" THAT IS A SIGN OF MAJOR HOSTILITY ACCORDING TO YIKES!
APOLOGIZE NOW! APOLOGIZE NOW!
OOOOPS! It's already too late! Um, Oh, well. Never Mind!
February 3, 2009 8:39 PM | Reply | Permalink
What did you expect when I was offered a trip to a town that won the "We hate Americans more than you do and will kill to prove it" award from 2003 to 2008 accompanied by a screeching harpy who no doubt thinks she can shoot her way of trouble and hitchhike to safety in Peshawar. Couldn't I just go to Vegas with the Wells Fargo boys instead?
February 3, 2009 9:38 PM | Reply | Permalink
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6oiBnFIC0uQ
February 3, 2009 11:31 PM | Reply | Permalink
So an ankle-length kilt should suffice.
February 3, 2009 11:23 PM | Reply | Permalink
Wait, I thought it was my special award.
February 3, 2009 8:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
I'm willing to share Bwak. You can take my spot on the trip to Kandahar with renaye. No need to thank me.
February 3, 2009 9:27 PM | Reply | Permalink
Dude! You were over there?
Oh geez. I'm sorry we didn't stop all this from the beginning.
=(
February 3, 2009 10:32 PM | Reply | Permalink
Scroll up Bwak. Never been, most likely never will.
February 4, 2009 9:58 AM | Reply | Permalink
.
Uhhhh . . .
Do I have to vote?
~OGD~
February 3, 2009 1:20 AM | Reply | Permalink
Just a sec. I'll ask Mildred.
February 3, 2009 1:22 AM | Reply | Permalink
Funny. When I told her who was asking, she came over all friendly. Wants you to know if you can come over for supper. Then she starts humming to herself, "something something... du__ a l'orange... something something... tra la tra la."
Like I say. Funny.
Maybe you should just vote. I'll send her your regards.
February 3, 2009 1:31 AM | Reply | Permalink
.
Wooooooow ...
Mildred? Mildred T. Mallard? Yowzer!
I haven't seen her since our halcyon days south of Puerto Vallarta in the winter of '76. It was a long flight for both us. Me, from the northern plains of the Dakotas, her from that icy pond in the hills of the Adirondacks. But by gawd it was worth every wing flap for me.
Now, excuse moi ... I must go sit in the reeds. Just thinking about her has caused the blood to rush from head to one of my primary extremities.
Later . . .
~OGD~
ps: I did notice back in those days that she had a funny tic. She kept drooling profusely every time I waddle into her presence. Hmmmm . . .
February 3, 2009 2:16 PM | Reply | Permalink
Not sure the two of you mean the same thing when you hear "duck a l'orange." But what the heck. Maybe you ducks are made of sterner stuff than I'd imagined. Daffy, f'rinstance, is one tough little black duck. Related? Or just role model? ;-)
February 3, 2009 5:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
.
Welllll . . . Q
Maybe that was why that gal had that tic of drooling profusely in my presence... Eh?
~OGD~
February 3, 2009 11:57 PM | Reply | Permalink
*puts on big hairy eyebrows*
She wouldn't be Mildred PIERCE, would she?
*runs out*
February 4, 2009 1:19 AM | Reply | Permalink
Dude, she thought ducks mated for life... bastard.
February 3, 2009 11:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
Emphatically... YES!!! I mean NO!!!!!!! Not sure really.... whut was the question?
February 3, 2009 1:36 AM | Reply | Permalink
Smilin' in spite of the odds. yers. trly
February 3, 2009 1:38 AM | Reply | Permalink
Now I got a pig in slippers lecturin' me about odds.
So I'm just putting you down as a "Yes," ok?
And stop snortin', or I'll tell ya what REALLY happened to yer mama.
February 3, 2009 8:58 AM | Reply | Permalink
I warned you.
Bacon.
February 3, 2009 8:59 AM | Reply | Permalink
Now I've got my mama being dragged through the mud... ;)
February 3, 2009 3:08 PM | Reply | Permalink
AWKKKKKKKKKKKK! Not bacon!
February 3, 2009 4:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
I love the smell of bacon in the morning!
February 4, 2009 1:21 AM | Reply | Permalink
You are a naughty, naughty, girl....
February 4, 2009 1:37 AM | Reply | Permalink
Don't I know it....
February 4, 2009 1:39 AM | Reply | Permalink
fudging the data...
The Gentlewoman's Guild says: Fudge for all!
February 3, 2009 9:31 AM | Reply | Permalink
a); b); c:); d); a&c; b&d; all of the above;-)
February 3, 2009 2:00 AM | Reply | Permalink
Demerit. Poor penmanship.
February 3, 2009 8:20 AM | Reply | Permalink
Gasp. Not for the demerit, but poor penmanship? What error have I committed (unless it's a faulty use of that ;-) thingy)? And, if not that -- I, too, know how to look things up on Urban Dictionary... well, then, how would you know? FYI: my cursive is a thing of archaic beauty; my architect's printing an art lost in the age of fonts. Now I am offended. But oh, heh, it's not all about me....
What's your point?
February 3, 2009 7:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
Did I say "penmanship"? Meant "font." Now, I expect that you'll complain that it's TPM's font choice, and therefore giving you the demerit is unjust.
Which it is.
So?
P.S. Just practicing my Cheney. Feels good.... ;-)
February 3, 2009 8:01 PM | Reply | Permalink
Didn't know that Cheney's "So?" would become such a catch phrase.
Sorry, Quinn, my pique is not, after all ,about you, at all. Rather, it is that I feel a little scorched on this usage of "so."
Over Christmas --- when I wanted nothing more than "let's move on; let's go for detente" my first husband, a Wall Street stockbroker, said "So?".....when I pointed out to him -- in an understated, let's get this unpleasantness behind us way -- that his abrogation of a promise to notify me when to sell, cost me $140K (which I bloody well need, now).
I realize that you are all about the parry and thrust, the banter of TPM now, and that is as it should be. I am wrong to carry my personal "ithsews" -- particularly when they are not spelled out for the sake of discretion -- into the much appreciated TPM banter.
You are the best. I'm sorry that there are times when I cannot rise to your occasion.
February 4, 2009 7:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hey WW. Sadly, I know about the "when to sell" issue rather too well. Being a damned fine economist (wink), I advised all my friends & family to sell 18 months ago - both stocks & houses they were thinking of selling. This worked quite well. Except for me. Seems I failed to take my own advice, and now sit in a house I may get clobbered for having to sell this spring. Timing, eh?
As for these jokers who DIDN'T tell people to sell... I have a level of loathing that's hard to describe. (Well, "loathing," actually covers it fairly well.) See, they give you all this talk about not taking on more risk than you can afford... but when the shit started to hit... my friends & I did not hear ONE of them telling us to sell, even though the risks had grown too high for us. I don't give a damn when someone with $10 million loses $140k. They can handle that risk. But to not tell other people? Pathetic. It's not just getting caught up in the market, it's having too much of an eye toward the richer clients, big money folks.
As for the parry & thrust, I'm actually continuing my policy of only rarely engaging in the most "short-term" debates - the personnel stuff, the day-to-day flogging of Republicans, the up's & down's of particular bills. I have my views, but tend to spend my time trying to sense what's coming, find tangential ways to get at larger changes we need to make, that sort of thing. As my friends say, my sensory array is lousy up close, but not bad at all at a distance. (See: Failure to sell own house...)
Of course, I kinda like banter when that means joking, playing, music, etc. I got more involved in some of the nastier parts of that recently, with our little trollish visits, and various other departures & replacements, etc. There's a level of nastiness & bullying I just can't tolerate, even online, and so - with less-than-useful results - I wade in.
But don't worry about any "pique," WW. I don't feel it from you here, so you may be feeling it more than communicating it.
Cheers, WW.
February 4, 2009 8:34 PM | Reply | Permalink
Quinn:
I will be really sorry if you have to sell your house.
First, because I take it that sale would result from having to make a shift in employment (and geographical location?) which is always a major adjustment.
Second, because that shift could result in a financial loss, if you have to sell the house fast.
But whether that happens or not, it would certainly mean, third, the profound loss of a place that has seemed to represent an important form of sanctuary to you. You seem happy there: whether describing your pillow and sham dilemma while furnishing it (which recalled a hilarious episode of BBC's "Coupling" series ); or describing skating downtown from it (which indicates that it has a great location, especially for you).
People often offer platitudes that they intend to be a comfort to others facing loss -- you know the ones: "it was meant to be" or "when one door closes, another one opens" blah, blah. Sometimes, it would be more comforting, really, to just hear someone say: "well, that sucks; I'm so sorry you're having that experience."
So, Quinn, if it happens -- no matter what happiness might or might not come next for you -- I'll be sorry that you had to have that experience. Keep us up to date, eh?
PS -- just to clarify: when I tried to talk to husband #1 about the lost $, I was NOT asking him to replace it. What I did want was: a) an acknowledgment of a broken promise; and b) just maybe an apology. His "So?" probably counts as the former, and I will have to be satisfied with that, as his unrepentant Wall Street mindset is so entrenched that an apology is never going to happen.
February 5, 2009 7:15 AM | Reply | Permalink
One person's boring is another's excitement. I've seen that right here at the Cafe. Mostly I find one sentence too short to be a blog. But there are exceptions to every rule. Please keep quinn's blogs coming.
February 3, 2009 2:09 AM | Reply | Permalink
Can I vote early................and often?
February 3, 2009 2:32 AM | Reply | Permalink
And also too truck nutz. What ever happened to all those Wonkers anyhow? They were kind of fun.
February 3, 2009 2:54 AM | Reply | Permalink
They live.... and walk.... and even blog.... amongst us....
Kinda frightening, eh? To think that "Tommy Two-Tone Underpants" might actually be treading the boards here at TPM.
February 3, 2009 2:21 PM | Reply | Permalink
I'm still panting for, er, waiting for Go Fer It to come back....
Now that was one Wonker I could go nuts over.
February 4, 2009 1:17 AM | Reply | Permalink
Didn't Mildred tell you... It's not the size of the blog that matters...
February 3, 2009 4:02 AM | Reply | Permalink
No.
All I ever get is, "My GAWD, that's a huge blog."
And, "That has GOTTA be the biggest blog I've ever...."
And "How can you WALK with that blog?!"
And, "Pass the Cheetos."
And, "You've got a blog on you like a HORSE!"
Anyway. Do go on. "It's not the size of the blog that matters...." is a phrase which is perhaps common amongst your people, but with which I am completely unacquainted. Is it a local thing? I love regional sayings. I'd have to guess it originates from New York, just given accent. Or is it an online thing, some phrase meant to give comfort to fellow bloggers, down on their luck?
February 3, 2009 8:33 AM | Reply | Permalink
I think you're confusing your blog with your raisin d'etre.
February 3, 2009 3:48 PM | Reply | Permalink
To paraphrase Inspector Clouseau once more,
"That is neut, ma bleug."
February 3, 2009 5:37 PM | Reply | Permalink
Is that why it bit me?
How about your minkey?
February 3, 2009 8:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
quinnnnnnnnnnnn! Do you have a lissance for your minkey????????
February 3, 2009 8:43 PM | Reply | Permalink
Personally, I read blogs for information with a point of view. For example today, Tom Wright has a post from Tokyo today that gives me a fresh. unfiltered by MSM peek at Japan.
I appreciate that, I'm grateful for that.
Smoking a bit of muggles and sitting around McDonald's giggling with my friends was very pleasurable in its day, but alas, one has had to put aside childish things and is looking for content now. I suppose as one's life gets shorter, one loathes to waste it on the electronic equivalent of hanging out.
February 3, 2009 6:24 AM | Reply | Permalink
That is SUCH a coincidence, David. Tom phoned me tomorrow from Tokyo. At first I thought the connection was poor, because of the racket in the background. But then he explained he was just hanging out at McDonalds with Daniel Dennett and a couple of their kamaitachi friends, and they were SO stoned they could barely order. The place was packed though - musicians, philosophers, poets, high class hookers.... He wanted to talk about Habermas, but Dennett kept shouting about Feyerabend in the background, you know, the way he does, "Against Method! Philosophical Anarchism Man!", and then eventually they all got shouting it, in these fake Japanese accents, and Tom started giggling & making Hamburglar jokes, and then somebody must've spilled their shake on the receiver, 'cause we got cut off.
Ahhh Tokyo.
Oh yeah. He also wanted me to pass along something. "Tell Seaton that I agree. We're all doomed. And that he was right all along. turns out, the end of the world WAS America's fault. It was the bloody 'secret sauce.' Seems it f*cks EVERYONE up. but hey - who knew?"
I'd like to apologize on behalf of Tom for his bad language. Musicians, though. Stoners, one and all.
February 3, 2009 8:52 AM | Reply | Permalink
Your reply to my reply is one of the best things you've done.
February 3, 2009 10:44 AM | Reply | Permalink
Your reply to Quinn's reply to your reply is one of the best things you've done. Everybody gets a cookie and a bowl of leftover chili cuz I have way too much and I don't feel like eating it all myself.
February 3, 2009 6:19 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks (urp) - ew, I hate chili burps.
February 3, 2009 11:41 PM | Reply | Permalink
Well about freakin' TIME I got a free meal in this damn joint!
February 3, 2009 11:43 PM | Reply | Permalink
Bring the hat and I'll throw in some nacho chips.
February 4, 2009 12:54 AM | Reply | Permalink
If I recall correctly, Markie luv, I returned your sweat-endowed baseball cap within a night's time, one long summer's night a year ago after I demanded all hats off.
I'm not really sure I want to eat nachos out of it.
I do, however, have a plastic pith helmet that I know is clean, and deep....it can hold a lot of chili and nachos....just like my belly.
What's your address?
February 4, 2009 1:15 AM | Reply | Permalink
I can't give you the address but I can tell you how to get here from La Guardia.
February 4, 2009 9:27 AM | Reply | Permalink
U R New Yawker?
Get out!!!!
February 4, 2009 9:28 AM | Reply | Permalink
Actually no, hence the directions from the airport. It's starts with a flight to Chicago.
But I do have a leather couch and loveseat I bought off a guy in Queens. Old black IKEA stuff that's so out of style it looks like it was ripped out of a 1937 Ford or could have been in Hitler's rec room. Looked fine in my old house in Jersey, not so sure about it here.
February 4, 2009 9:35 AM | Reply | Permalink
Chicago rawks, I was there this past summer.
:)
February 4, 2009 10:08 PM | Reply | Permalink
I love Chicago too. Much nicer than NY City to my mind. Never thought I'd come to love the miswest as I do. :)
February 4, 2009 10:11 PM | Reply | Permalink
sorry, Midwest! (not miswest)
February 4, 2009 10:12 PM | Reply | Permalink
I kinda' like the Miswest myself, but then that's only me!
February 4, 2009 10:20 PM | Reply | Permalink
:-)
February 4, 2009 10:24 PM | Reply | Permalink
I concur. That's why I lived there for nine years before being exiled to the far eastern suburbs.
February 4, 2009 10:44 PM | Reply | Permalink
Where else can you take the elevator down from your room on the 70th floor and walk thru a tunnel under LSD and out onto a beach with a crystal clear lake in front of you as far as the eye can see? That lake of course is frozen with huge ice floes right now but you get the idea.
February 5, 2009 12:55 AM | Reply | Permalink
quinn, may I say that you have the same je ne sais quoi as Tom Robbins, and you just showed it with your brilliant response to Seaton's post?
Sometimes I try to do this, but it just comes off as copy-cat. Seaton and I both recognize this as genius! I'm going to show your post to my best friend who is afraid of the internet but loves great writing.
February 3, 2009 8:48 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks Cville - I wish I could write anything of ANY length as clearly, and brilliantly, as that guy. But he's in a class of his own. I just wish we had a few more writers like him. I was hoping Matt Ruff would continue on his Robbins II trajectory, but I think there's a level of dementia just in thinking like Robbins that makes it hard to sustain both writing & sanity. My Holy Grail is just to do a single blog that could reach the zone TR's in. I also suspect the fact that I'm rereading 'Roadside' right now influenced the paragraph above, so... who knows. Maybe osmosis has potential after all. ;-)
February 3, 2009 9:49 PM | Reply | Permalink
"Another Roadside Attraction," -- great, but not his best. I love "Jitterbug Perfume," "Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates," and others (I even have a pair of frog pajamas -- not something I like to admit except in the privacy of the internet --)
Did I ever tell you I met the great Tom? He told a great story at a writer's conference in Richmond, VA a few years ago. He was everything I imagined. He said at the time he was getting ready to write a book about Africa. I am still waiting...
February 3, 2009 10:56 PM | Reply | Permalink
I prefer blogs that go on and on and on until the eyes g
l
a
z e ove...............
February 3, 2009 7:00 AM | Reply | Permalink
Very nice graphic representation, flavius! Bonus points.
I'm putting you down as a "Yes." ;-)
February 3, 2009 1:22 PM | Reply | Permalink
Sweet
February 3, 2009 8:26 AM | Reply | Permalink
Steve, you had a chance at the prize for Shortest Comment," but then Dij stiffed you with that "Yo" of hers.
And sorry, shortening it to "Swee" will not produce a winner. We're gonna need your BEST performance.
February 3, 2009 6:36 PM | Reply | Permalink
I don't care how long they are, as long as they have a factual and informed point.
February 3, 2009 8:55 AM | Reply | Permalink
What are you doing here, then?
February 3, 2009 11:44 PM | Reply | Permalink
Yo.
February 3, 2009 9:16 AM | Reply | Permalink
Yo Yo Ma Ma.
February 3, 2009 9:23 AM | Reply | Permalink
Long or short as long as it's interesting that's all I care about. And factual and informed points aren't always necessary if we're talking about wingnut sites. They seem functionally incapable of informed points let alone finding facts and I'm happy to provide those myself.
February 3, 2009 9:28 AM | Reply | Permalink
I left you a message on Eric Wattree's blog:
http://tpmcafe.talkingpointsmemo.com/talk/blogs/wattree/2009/02/secretary-of-the-arts-sounds-l.php#comment-3362312
I promoted you there. And I'm promoting him here.
♪ ♪ ♪
February 3, 2009 10:42 AM | Reply | Permalink
LOL!
February 3, 2009 11:24 AM | Reply | Permalink
"I knew you were under duress - I knew you were under your dress."
- Captain Beefheart
February 3, 2009 2:57 PM | Reply | Permalink
If you want the bonus points, TT, you gotta produce the video link. 5 points if you come through, dude.
February 3, 2009 5:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
Whoops. Sorry dude. Too late.
(Them points're VALUABLE, baby. I'm not handing 'em out that easy!) ;-)
February 3, 2009 5:43 PM | Reply | Permalink
Q, we have spoken about this in our office many times. You must cease from replying to yourselves. Now go down to White Drug and get your prescription filled again.
Otherwise you will have to put on those pajamas with the ass hanging out and it will be very difficult to get a taxi to pick you up.
February 3, 2009 5:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
Ha, I've outwitted you, Doctor Dick!
I found that if I just reverse those pajama bottoms, I get picked up in NO time. (Actually, it's kinda weird how women can suddenly become so compassionate - just because of a change in fashion. Mildred too. Damnedest thing.)
February 3, 2009 5:58 PM | Reply | Permalink
We could make a mint. Look at those commercials for the reverse robe.
Ever had a problem with petting your cat and being warm at the same time and not leaving stains on your furniture?
Well here it is. And here we are. The reverse pjs.
February 3, 2009 6:05 PM | Reply | Permalink
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Y9_kpc7zjZM
Yes or No?!
February 3, 2009 8:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
Brilliant. Just sat watching his vids for the last hour. I think my head is now completely destroyed. Destroyeder. Earth Day was great, but here's one backatcha.
Besides, life here can get pretty tough. Though I'm working on my moves.
February 3, 2009 9:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
Guy Fawkes Day is definitely my favorite.
"No I know it's a fag but it looks like a banger..."
February 4, 2009 2:10 AM | Reply | Permalink
I despise cheap, one or two sentence blogs; but 7 pages? Please, professor; are those our only choices?
I recently wrote a letter to the editor to my local newspaper. I spent some time honing it down, but sent it in because I thought it was too brilliant to shorten any further. The editor called me and agreed that it was important but was way too long.
I cut out 200 words! And it was better when I was done! It was hard, but quinn, I swear it was a better document without those 200 words, and I was as surprised as you are to hear this.
Occasional long blogs are worth it (as some of yours have been) but if you want to reach any kind of an audience, you really must learn to edit. When I see something very long on the internet that I want to read, I print it out because I can't give the attention that I need to, to a screen, at least when it is narrow, like here.
So, that's my 2 cent's worth. Could be shorter, but I'm not in the mood to edit.
February 3, 2009 8:37 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hey Cville. Thanks for these. The thing with blogs is there's so little time to write them. Give me a day, and I can cut 20%... but not much more. One-liners are easy, but that in-between length... blog-length... I'm still not hitting it. Partly because my thoughts tend to come in at a slight angle from the norm (to put it politely), and that often leaves me trying to explain 3 or 4 connections, instead of 1.
Plus, I think years of writing reports for bureaucrats has made my writing generally appalling. When I compare now with my 20's, makes me want to weep.
And then there's the 19 concussions. i suspect that's had some influence. ;-)
So Robbins need not worry. I'm rereading 'Roadside' right now, so his influence seeps into how I think & talk even, but they guy was just bloody brilliant. Let's hope that somewhere, there's another one of two of him. Cheers, Cville.
February 3, 2009 9:30 PM | Reply | Permalink
I love this:
Quinn. I mean this: Never avoid posting something because it is too long. If some people don't read it, so be it. You always have something to say, but to quote Tom again:
"The words are 'the cake,' they are not the icing." You can tell that from the way he weaves his stories around; the story is really secondary ( do we really care about Boomer and his cute wife in their camper? No, it is the words that we care about) -- the message meanders along just fine.
You have a gift for putting the words together and that is what writing is about. Don't stop!
February 3, 2009 11:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
Q. And Cville - ditto!
Long comment in the making here, I suspect.
(And have you really had 19 concussions?)
One of the hardest assignments I had was my first semester in grad school. We had to write our philosophy of education. Well, I could go on for pages on that, right? But my teacher, a really wonderful teacher, was a stickler for brevity. I think he made us keep it under 400 words. Might have been less. We thought he was nuts, and even more so when he told us he had doubled his original number for us. I think I had nightmares about Strunk and White. But he ended up being right. I painstakingly went through that beast and think I ended up at about 399 words, but it worked. And it came out what I needed it to.
There's much to be said for brevity.
But I'm going to defend it's opposite for a minute. (Or 5.)
(P.S. Damn you all for constantly bringing up books and authors I haven't got to yet. My Amazon shopping cart is rapidly approaching millions of dollars worth of "Saved for Later" merchandise. I've never read any Robbins until tonight, and I've just spent the last hour or so reading some of his stuff online (which is a terrible way to read books, I maintain.).)
And what I notice is a similarity to Vonnegut and sort of a sense of Twain and Hunter S. Thompson and a handful of other authors I can't put my finger on right now.
Mostly, it's an aesthetic similarity that strikes me, the writing style, the irreverence, the eye of an observer of life and the world, but more relevant to the topic here, a disregard for convention.
I generally came to TPM to learn some stuff, and a bit of a get-away, and for kicks. I have a teacher's eye to most things these days, as I'm figuring out how to teach kids to be good writers, & I find myself finding answers to that a lot more here. And also my own writing changing, partly from sheer quantity, but also the influence of the various writing styles around here.
Billy's blogs were always brief. They provoked. They fit all this stuff into a teeny little blog that took long comment threads and frequent fights to break open. The Obama myth one comes to mind. Des has this sort of observer's commentary thing, where he can bring in all sorts of seemingly unrelated current events and figures and make it work. Blue Guy had flow and the Old Guy had voice.
And you break convention Q, and you have voice. Yeah, it's on a blog, but your posts are more like a story walk, getting through the pieces and the connections and the angles.
So we're talking a lot in one of my literacy classes about the intense connection between reading and writing, and how good writing comes from reading, from observing the writer's craft... and I was thinking about that and some of my favorite poster's styles and it occurred to me that it's taken me 20 some years to break out of the Pavlovian training about writing that was practically beaten into me in school.
There was no real connection between reading and writing then, other than contrived book reports.
We charted sentences till the cows came home, and named words: adjective/adverb/preposition and gave them their places. And we were trained, with "writing rules" and grades. Like electric shocks.
Comma where you should have used a semi-colon? Bzzz. (-5 pts.)
Run-ons, fragments, contractions, slang, dialect? Bzzzzzzz. (Immediate fail.)
Wander off the plot-line? (Forced rewrite.)
I'm reminded of an art teacher I had. I drew my cat, and loved it. It was perfect. The shine and blend of the fur looked damn good. She told me she didn't like it and that she wanted me to add texture by drawing every single hair of the coat. I did. And hated it. Who was she to tell me what art looked like? (Nevermind that you certainly cannot make out every hair on a cat's back.) Literature and writing are essentially the same, an artist's craft.
Sometimes, breaking the rules has the effect of connecting you to the reader, taking you somewhere, making it conversational, intriguing. Real, I guess. Same goes for some of the longer, rambling and rustling posts. So my point is: either there are no real rules, or if there are, they are sometimes worth breaking. And if it means we get Natufian lore and Ice Weasels and Walls and best of all, Amazing Technicolor posts...
February 3, 2009 11:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
That was beautiful. Thank you.
February 4, 2009 12:04 AM | Reply | Permalink
Barefoot! How did I forget you in there? You manage to write like we're all old friends, even for the newest person to arrive, with voice and a tangible "realness" to it, and creating a real interaction through the close connection between the writing and reading of the posts. So hat tip to you as well. ;)
February 4, 2009 7:47 AM | Reply | Permalink
Jitterbug is definitely my fave Robbins - like Cville. On writing, all I can say is, once, believe it or not, I wrote poetry. Was fairly good. Point being, it was all short, images, fairly tight even. Add 15 years of writing policy papers, beating the life out of every sentence, pretty cruel result. "38-page-at-a-time" result. ;-)
February 4, 2009 12:43 AM | Reply | Permalink
Hilary, thank you for a very beautiful post. I'm glad you are liking Tom. Hint: Don't read "Hotel Incognito," it is not worthy of him; I think he must have been off when he wrote it.
I have to say there are some rules that we shouldn't break. One is (besides NEVER using the word "awesome"):
DON'T OVERUSE ADVERBS!!!!
(She said, breathlessly) LOL
February 4, 2009 10:43 AM | Reply | Permalink
I guess it comes down to this:
Size Matters
But what you write must be developed, and to do that it takes a certain number of words. So for me, small size ( 2 sentences for a "blog") doesn't get it because it doesn't even come close to providing the 'blogger's' point of view. If you don't have an interesting take on the subject, just sit back and wait, because someone will. You don't need to blog:
"Daschle Pulls Out Comments?."
And expect everyone else to supply the ideas. That is not blogging.
Quinn, please continue your long blogs. I some don't want to bother, it's okay. I love your take on things, and complicated "takes" are not 2 paragraph efforts.
PS: It's time to start that novel!
February 3, 2009 9:01 PM | Reply | Permalink
What? Daschle is having trouble with his sex life, too?
February 3, 2009 10:18 PM | Reply | Permalink
That was a total freudian slip! Good catch! tee hee!
February 3, 2009 10:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
"Daschle Pulls Out Comments?."
The punctuation could mean the world on that one.
February 3, 2009 11:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
quinn esq. As a member of the Elite Ruling Class, I hereby bequeath unto you my title. Henceforth, let it be known to all at TPM that barefooted is but a humble servant at the feet of the New Leader. Well, one of them - there doesn't seem to be a clear shot at the title. Maybe we can come up with some sort of a play-off series? Ah well, I'm out of it. Appears CVille Dem, Marquis, TheraP (and you!) have the momentum, but watch that second string. Miguelitoh2o's warming up.
February 3, 2009 10:19 PM | Reply | Permalink
YIKES! What clear thinking!
February 3, 2009 10:28 PM | Reply | Permalink
I'd like to see Marquis vs Miguelito, personally. M vs. M.
Marquis, you gotta wear some kinda fancy French robe though, ok? Like WWF. Speak in an accent. You know, get the crowd boo'in' and stuff.
Miguelito's gonna be covered in mud. And snort as he enters the ring. Here's the down home hero.
I got my popcorn. This should be good. "Screw you Marquis ya poncy bastard! Come on PIG-BOY!"
February 3, 2009 10:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
¿Mi amigo, peegalito?
¡Quinn es muy mal! ¡¡¡MUY MUY MUY MAL!!!
February 3, 2009 10:46 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thought you'd like these, Bwak.
They're actual interviews with Brits, about various topics, then matched with Aaardman's animals (and birds.)
;-)
February 3, 2009 11:14 PM | Reply | Permalink
Um, what? Doesn't much look like aardman
=(
February 3, 2009 11:23 PM | Reply | Permalink
Yup. They're all Aardman. And all weird.
February 3, 2009 11:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
Flying Dutchman move by The People's Pig! Marquis d'Squad and his henchmen counter with the chair! Ohhh, that had to hurt. Under the ropes - outside the ring ... wait! Somebody get her outta there! Is that TheraP throwing mud? ... The People's Pig is going for the ladder, look at him keep his slippers steady - what control!
Uh oh! CVille Dem's in the corner, seems like she's gotten Pig's attention ... Marquis d'Squad has the ladder and whoa! What a move! The People's Pig is down and the henchmen are going for the slippers ...
Hold it! Is that a chicken??
February 3, 2009 11:21 PM | Reply | Permalink
Ack! Too much Drama.
We need a sheepish.
February 3, 2009 11:26 PM | Reply | Permalink
Awesome play-by-play, MM. I think you may have a caree... BLANG!
Ohhhhhh. Nassssssty. The Marquis has just belted the announcer with a chair, and I'd say she's out for the evening!
Will Pig-Boy avenge the poor dead, errrrr, "unconscious" announcer? Tune in next week!
February 3, 2009 11:44 PM | Reply | Permalink
No working the refs!
February 3, 2009 10:51 PM | Reply | Permalink
Interesting that only Miguel actually voted. Or tried to.
You all are employing a Norm Coleman strategy. I'm not falling for it. I'm voting.
February 3, 2009 11:29 PM | Reply | Permalink
I'm count that as another "Yes."
Which means, using the Minnesota method, the final score is....
Lawyers $13,769,038.
People nil.
February 3, 2009 11:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
Damn. I'm humbled. They don't call you esq for nothing.
I think we should be grateful to those who are willing to give so freely of themselves. 8,000 words buys a lot of hot dogs.
February 3, 2009 11:55 PM | Reply | Permalink
Y'all are weird.....but I lurvz you anyway.
February 4, 2009 12:12 AM | Reply | Permalink
Quinnesque, whatever you write is great. REally. And if you doubt it, just remember, you don't exhibit any of these signs. Hence, you MUST be simply fab.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzlVyCgZBdY&feature=pyv
February 4, 2009 12:21 AM | Reply | Permalink