The Boy from Itawamba
I will call him John. He's a sophomore at Itawamba Agricultural High School in Fulton Mississippi--the now infamous school that refused Constance McMillen's request to take her girlfriend to the senior prom. In this day and age such actions completely confuse me: Why are these small, Southern communities still so hostile to gays and lesbians? Usually, I chalk it up to the church and a lack of education and then I move on to the next article on the Huffington Post. This time, however, I went in search of answers.
Using Facebook, I found John. He loves women and the UFC. He's Baptist (although his work schedule doesn't
allow him to attend church as much as he would like). He's not sure if he will attend college, but
he's excited about joining the Marines. In
the "favorite books" section of his profile, John writes: "I only read when I have
to." Given these characteristic, I began the interview expecting a steady
stream of anti-gay rhetoric. I was
wrong. As John said himself, "We are not
what [the media is] attempting to make men and women around the world see us as."
John is nothing like the stereotype. The small LGBT community at Itawamba is no secret, and John doesn't care, "they are not really trying to hide the fact that they are different because we do not really judge them for who they are or want to be." He added: "they make it very apparent. They do not care about their sexuality because we really do not care what they do with their personal life." About Constance, he said, "I respect her life choices because it is her life." The more I learned about his views and about his life I figured out that the "silent majority" of this country consists of individuals who do not wake up every morning worrying about gays and lesbians. They do not wake up with hate in their hearts. Instead, they hit the alarm clock each day with concern: they worry about jobs and whether they can provide for their families. They want to live a just life--a notion far less grand than its Platonic version. They want to have a little spending money in their pockets. They want to watch college football. They want to marry their high school sweethearts.
They also believe in fairness. Based on my exchange with John, it seems that
his peers generally do not care if Constance and her girlfriend attend
the prom. In fact, they feel uneasy with
the school's discrimination. Yet they
still blame Constance. A young man that attends another high school
in the area told me that, although he understands her position, he still
believes she is being "selfish:"
"because of her the other students won't have a prom." John offered a similar assessment. While he doesn't care about her sexuality, he
doesn't "like the way the ACLU is suing my school. Because this is just going
to cause young adults like myself to lose a very great school." He later added: "Now the ACLU is defending [Constance] and suing our school for this but they will
not stand up for prayer in our schools. Do you not find that wrong? [T]hey
abolished our constitutional rights [to] freedom of religion in our schools but
will defend the rights of people that feel they are being judged when they
really aren't."
John is a victim, but the culprit is neither the ACLU nor Constance. It's the Itawamba County school board. Conservative political elites, like those on the school board, create simple narratives and zero-sum games to turn otherwise caring people against their neighbors. John, and perhaps others at his school, did not care about gays and lesbians attending the prom until school officials made Constance the enemy of the good--until school officials manipulated the situation, making it seem as if Constance and the ACLU were prioritizing gay rights over every high school student's right to a fun and memorable senior year. These elites make it seem as if the media, liberal politicians, and liberal organizations create problems where problems don't really exist. Unfortunately, the national media only adds insult to injury. The media's own need for simple narratives forced them to create a story about courageous Constance versus the homophobic hicks in her community. Part of that story is true: Constance is certainly courageous. But not all of her classmates and neighbors, as John informed me, are motivated by hate: "my closest friends really just want to have a good time without all of this controversy going around about our school 'hating gays, bisexuals, and lesbians."
This young PhD learned a lot from John. As much as progressives like to demean entire regions of the country, we must be careful. We fall into the same trap as those we demean. Conservative political elites who, either for ideological or political reasons, seek to preserve the status quo make the good the enemy of the people. They manipulate and lie so that honest, hard-working Americans who believe in fairness consider those things which we consider just unfair. They make Constance, health care reform, and cap and trade seem like unjust impositions on the lives of decent people. Unfortunately, they have fooled me too. Yet a fool I will be no longer be. Because of the boy from Itawamba, I will no longer make the people the enemy of the good.










