LisB's Blog

Two Articles Your Right-Leaning Friends Should Read

2010-09-11T20:15:21Z

While perusing the web today, I stumbled upon these two articles that really scared the hell out of me. I think every right-leaning Independent and every Republican should read these. So please share them with whomever you know:

http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2010_09/025622.php

Right around the time President Obama was presenting his vision for the economy at a White House press conference, Rep. Lynn Westmoreland (R-Ga.), the vice chairman of the National Republican Congressional Committee, spoke to disgraced lobbyist Ralph Reed's right-wing confab, and offered a vision of his own.

If Republicans take back the House, Westmoreland said, they would use their new majority to force a budget battle akin to the fight staged by former Speaker Newt Gingrich with President Clinton and shut down the federal government. Westmoreland cautioned that he was fully aware that such a move would close down hospitals for veterans and shut down National Parks. But, Westmoreland argued that taking down the government is worth "the pain" because health reform and government programs are like a "gangrene" that "need to be cleaned out."

I mention this for two reasons. The first is that the mainstream American electorate probably has no idea just how radical the Republican agenda would be next year. By one credible estimate, the GOP now has about a two-in-three chance of claiming a House majority, and it's very likely that much of the country will ask themselves, in early 2011, "Wait, we voted for what?"

http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2010_09/025619.php

.... At yesterday's White House press conference, Bloomberg reporter Hans Nichols asked President Obama about the likelihood of appointing Elizabeth Warren to the new consumer financial protection bureau. The president certainly seemed to be leaning in that direction. Nichols followed up, asking if Obama's concerned about the Senate confirmation process.

"I'm concerned about all Senate confirmations these days," the president responded. When the reporter chuckled, Obama added, "Hans, I wasn't trying to be funny. I am concerned about all Senate nominations these days."

What the heck - show these two stories to your left-leaning friends, your fellow Democrats, too. Be sure they all understand why it is to important we get out and vote this year. If you can volunteer for a local campaign, or make donations to one (or several), that's even better. But please, send these articles around so that everyone you know understands what we're up against.

Cross-posted at http://onceuponatpm.wordpress.com/

So, Um....

2010-09-11T06:51:36Z

...when the fuck does this place fall down, anyway?

Hee. Okay, my last post here, for now, I think....but we've been saying this for a week. All night. And we're still here.

Whether or not we are still here tomorrow, WE ARE STILL HERE in life beyond the Readers' Posts. And so many of your lives have touched mine, and I can't lose the dashboard and the Readers' Posts page without telling you so.

I am grateful to you all for letting me have a voice here, and for all the friendships formed. And for all the arguments and the posts that made me learn and think and question what I have learned and about how I think.

We'll all come back here, if Josh allows. Until then, we all know we have places to go, and people to follow.

And we all know we have work to do, come tomorrow.

Let's work on keeping Congress intact - mostly Dems. Let's work on keeping the important things on the front burner. Let's work on loving one another and helping our fellow man and his causes as well as our own causes.

Let's work on working on ourselves and helping others, and not so much on helping ourselves to whatever's next.

Let's work on love, peace, and understanding.

And VOTING, dammit!!

Vote!

Much love and peace to you all. Good night.

My Last Post for Now, Until Things Settle

2010-09-04T06:11:43Z

And, hell, if there was ever a God, I'm sure he's said the same thing too. I'm sure he'd say, "Chill, people. But write what you want until I take you away....for a short time, and then land you back on your feet again...when things settle."

The good news is that Josh is working to let us stay here, and that's what counts. This poem of mine, it's garbage. But, then again, it ain't.

So, um, here's a poem I wrote about two years ago, about two people, tending a garden:

]]> Naming Names

He was born of atoms, in the morning
I came later, as dusk turned to eve
He looked at me and felt complemented
I looked at him and felt love

We pass the days, walking the grounds
we pass the nights entwined
We see the flowers come to bloom
Forests, meadows, mountains, seas

With every tree, every raindrop
each cloud, we feel we're one
Nights and days roll into years
bringing others one by one

I stroke the back of a golden beast
lying stretched out in the grass
I scratch the ears amidst its mane
hear its blood rumble and purr under its skin

My man stands near a black-furred creature
who raises itself on hind legs
They hug each other, holding close
barely able to bear the weight
They walk to the river
to gaze down at the silver
slithering things under the surface
shining like a million suns

We stand together, later, in a clearing
eyeing great wings circling above
They cry out as if hawking their wares
before one swoops down to land on my shoulder

Centuries pass, we treasure each moment
new companions arriving in time
We name them all, every being
Even the winding, legless one
who hisses and sticks out its tongue

I can't understand its words
but I love the way it moves
as it winds itself around the trees
whispering, gossiping, imagining things

I wonder what it's seen

All of us here with room to spare
manna for food
love for comfort
learning, caring, naming names
in the language we all share

I wonder if anyone cares, sometimes
I wonder if anyone's there

Political Haiku

2010-09-01T03:41:04Z

We haven't done this in a while.

Remember the rules: Five syllables on the first line, seven on the second, and five on the third.

The right cannot hold
the right is in disarray
Boehner has no plan

That's my contribution. It's my hope you'll contribute too.

Oh Beautiful

2010-08-27T06:01:37Z

Till selfish gain no longer stain
The banner of the free!

From Wiki:

At various times in the more than 100 years that have elapsed since the song as we know it was born, particularly during the John F. Kennedy administration, there have been efforts to give "America the Beautiful" legal status either as a national hymn, or as a national anthem equal to, or in place of, "The Star-Spangled Banner", but so far this has not succeeded. Proponents prefer "America the Beautiful" for various reasons, saying it is easier to sing, more melodic, and more adaptable to new orchestrations while still remaining as easily recognizable as "The Star-Spangled Banner." Some prefer "America the Beautiful" over "The Star-Spangled Banner" due to the latter's war-oriented imagery. Others prefer "The Star-Spangled Banner" for the same reason, or for the reason that it does not directly invoke God. While that national dichotomy has stymied any effort at changing the tradition of the national anthem, "America the Beautiful" continues to be held in high esteem by a large number of Americans.
Popularity of the song increased greatly following the September 11, 2001 attacks; at some sporting events it was sung in addition to the traditional singing of the national anthem. During the first taping of the Late Show with David Letterman following the attacks, CBS newsman Dan Rather cried briefly as he quoted the fourth verse.
Ray Charles is credited with the song's most well known rendition in current times (although Elvis Presley had success with it in the 1970s). Charles' recording is very commonly played at major sporting events, such as the Super Bowl, and WrestleMania; Charles gave a live performance of the song prior to Super Bowl XXXV, the last Super Bowl played before the September 11 terrorist attacks. He places the third verse first, after which he sings the usual first verse. In the third verse, the author scolds the materialistic and self-serving robber barons of her day, and urges America to live up to its noble ideals and to honor, with both word and deed, the memory of those who died for their country.
Symbolically, Marian Anderson (a noted opera singer of her day) sang a rendition of America on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in 1939 after being refused use of Constitution Hall by the Daughters of the American Revolution because of her skin color.
The words of the Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution can be sung as verses of "America the Beautiful", an appropriate mnemonic for the amendment which in 1868 declared African Americans to be full citizens of the United States.
An all-star version of "America the Beautiful" performed by country music singers Trace Adkins, Billy Dean, Vince Gill, Carolyn Dawn Johnson, Toby Keith, Brenda Lee, Lonestar, Martina McBride, Jamie O'Neal, Kenny Rogers and Keith Urban reached #58 on the Billboard Hot Country Singles & Tracks chart in July 2001. The song re-entered the chart following the September 11 terrorist attacks.
When Richard Nixon visited the People's Republic of China in 1972, this song was played by Chinese as the welcome music. The Chinese characters for United States literally mean "Beautiful Country."
The song is often included in songbooks in a wide variety of religious congregations in the United States.

Just seems to me that our country has lost its bearings, and everything is getting fucked up. You feel the same?

I think the antidote is to keep talking sense to everyone we know. Keep trying to talk sense.

Because there's so much nonsense going around lately.

Our country, our people, our planet, our every stuff, was made for cooperation. And lately, we haven't been getting it. ..nor giving it. Only if we start trying to spread it, will we see it come around.

So please....try to do or be something beautiful.

Try to keep our every stuff healthy, and here.

Thanks.

TGIF Break

2010-08-14T01:01:23Z

Yay! It's Friday!! Time to let the hair down, relax some, and have a little fun with friends.

Come chat?

If you don't feel comfortable chatting, just say hi here in comments, and feel free to add your favorite new songs/videos (or old ones).

Also feel free to wish a lil chicken a happy birthday in comments as well.

One Nation, Under God......One Earth, Under WOT exactly?

2010-08-12T04:46:51Z

I had wanted to write my next post about the book I ordered from our fellow TPM writer Hesham Hassaballa.....I had wanted it to be a book review, as well as a thank you post. Hesham was kind enough to include a handwritten note to me in my copy of his book after I ordered it through his FaithPen.com site (although, he does that for anyone who buys the book, but still).

For me, religion has always been a deep mystery. A riddle. A fairy tale. A hope. A curse.

Something to avoid, and yet something that attracts. Kind of like a bad boy in leather, I suppose. But, I digress....

Religion, in my eyes, is unanswerable, unsolvable, and -- depending upon whom you speak to about it -- it's more malleable than my mother's new plastic knee (and Mom's new knee is doing great, thanks....she'll be climbing stairs again in about three weeks if she has her way about it).

Getting down to the nitty gritty, all of those who adhere to religious beliefs tend to agree that prophets came along and shared the message of one god. Now, just who that one god is, well, that gets kinda fuzzy.

Christians and Muslims actually believe in one God. Catholics, well, they believe in three, but they like to confuse everything else so I'm gonna discount them, for now. Native Americans believe in a Spirit (I like this belief the best, by the way) and Buddhists believe in a Middle Path (my second fave).

That's my understanding of world religions, so far, but I obviously have a long way to go. As most of you know, I'm not a college grad, so all that I've learned of religion so far is self-taught.

Seems to me, though, that all of religion is based upon one golden rule: Love One Another.

For me, that's usually an easy rule.

I love humankind, I love animals, I love our planet and try to do what's best for all whenever I can (unless I get angry, but even then, I feel like crap the next day and try to make amends). I believe that what goes around comes around. From what I understand most religions say that God or his angels keep a tally sheet of our good deeds as well as our bad deeds and, come Judgment Day, we get a wake up call kind of trial wherein we have to be reminded of all our crappiest moments as well as our best, and then accept our punishment or reward depending on what God has decided about us.

Wow, what a busy God. I hope he has a good Administrative Assistant. Not to mention a great IT Director. Shit, I thought Santa was busy keeping lists. Oy!

Anyway, here's my thoughts on Mosques and everything else under the sun.

A church is a church is a temple is a temple is a mosque is a mosque is a closet is a closet is a community center is a community center is a YMCA is a YMCA is a YWCA is a YWCA is a whatever.

Whatever you pray to, let you pray to it. Whatever you believe, believe!! If you want to wear a veil, if you want to wear a cross around your neck in 14K gold, if you want to be a Wiccan or you want to shave your head.....

.....it's your right.

It's YOUR faith, and my understanding of this here country I live in says that no one should mess with your faith or your religion.

If any state wants to suddenly declare that a mosque is a mosque and that's not the same as a church is a church, well......that state has some answering to do to me, let alone you.

We are all one people, on one earth, and until God declares that America (or any other country) is his and his alone, we are one species on this planet and we all should get along peaceably.

God dammit.

/gets off soap box

Not a Challenge, But an Opportunity

2010-07-31T05:51:54Z

When I was three, my parents divorced. This kind of upset my two older sisters and I. Well, it upset a lot of people, but, looking back from an adult's point of view into a child's, it just upset us kids the most.

We lost our foundation. All the grandparents, on both sides, rushed in to help, as did so many others. And, eventually, we got through it. But to say that there are no scars left would be ridiculous.

My ability to trust others, even loved ones, was shaken. My feeling of safety and security in daily routines was forever disrupted. My inner sense of worth was constantly questioned. And that's just me. My sisters have their issues as well. We each handle them differently, but we have our issues. My father's subsequent daughters do too.

Because of this, there was, in my family, throughout the years, a lot of talk.

]]>
In short, my sisters and I took it upon ourselves to teach ourselves how to deal with the conflicting stories told to us by all the various adults around us.

However, each of us children had different favorite adults that we liked to listen to.

And as we grew older, my sisters and I would now and then compare notes as to what we remembered and what we understood and how we felt. And, lo and behold, each of us had not only different feelings, but we had different memories. To this day, when I share my own recollections with my two oldest sisters, 50% of the time they remember the situation almost as I do, and the other half of the time they tell me I'm totally wrong.

And one will invariably tell me that "No, Lissie, it was DADDY who said that, not so and so." Or, "No, Elisabeth, what really happened was THIS....". And I take them at their word, because they have better recollections, or so I think.

The younger sisters that I have, well.....I can only hope they have their way of learning things from us and from each other too.

Long story short, the truth of my family is completely mangled, as it's remembered so differently just by us girls, let alone the adults involved....some gone, and the few still with us each having their own point of view and their own recollections of what was.

It's like the game called "Telephone", where you sit all these people down in a circle, and the first person whispers a sentence into the ear of the person to their right, and then that person whispers to the person on their right, and so on, and so on, and on and on and on.....and at the end of the game, the message is so garbled as to be laughable.

(Which is how I view the written versions of all religions, btw, but that's beside the point).

My ultimate point here is to say that, um....oh wait. First I have to keep talking about me. LOL.

At one point, my most immediate family decided to go through family therapy.

I was a teen at the time, and reluctant to show how upset I was, because I hated making waves. I could see each side to every story, and just wanted us all to get along. My eldest sister had no problem vocalizing for both of us, without realizing that sometimes her views and mine didn't agree. My mother was unhappily married again to a man she has since divorced and simply wanted to vent. And the soon-to-be-divorced husband, my first step-dad was there too, in family therapy, reluctantly, and just wanted to be listened to and agreed with, no matter what. Oh, poor therapist.

All three of them talked and talked and yelled and yelled, and the therapist sat there taking notes.

That was our first session.

All three of them talked and talked and yelled and yelled, and I sometimes piped up and shared my own thoughts now and then, and the therapist sat there taking notes.

That was our second session.

All three of them yelled and yelled and I sometimes piped up and shared my own thoughts now and then, and then the therapist yelled louder than them and said, "Hey!"

She said, "This is my diagnosis of your family. You all triangulate. And you don't communicate. And you don't listen to Lis at all, and she has a lot to say."

Well, today, my family listens to me more. But we still triangulate, to this day. All families do, I suppose.

For those of you unfamiliar with the term, "triangulate", it means that if my oldest sister is angry about something Mom said to her, she won't confront Mom about it, but instead she will come to me and talk it out. If I'm upset with something my middle sister did to me, I won't confront her, but go to my mother or my other sister instead.

We seek out the person who will be sympathetic to us and our plight, and we will turn the person with whom we are angry into the villain.

In this way, we avoid the conflict with said person we are angry with. At the same time, we try to form "sides", or "camps". And, eventually, given time, we create rifts.

Our family therapist tried to explain to my step-dad and mother and sister and I that, in the long run, it is far better to simply say to the person you have an issue with, "I'd like to sit down with you and talk about that situation that came up the other day. Will you please discuss it with me, one on one? Let's see if we can clear the air and come to an understanding."

And, of course, we had rules our therapist gave us. The main one being, "Don't accuse." Meaning, don't start the conversation out with, "Yo, what you said was wrong and hurtful and you made me feel like shit and I hate the way you interact with people."

Instead, we were told to say something like, "I respect the feelings behind what you said, and I understand you have an issue that is valid, but I think we need to clarify how we both feel about it."

You don't say, "You're wrong and you're mean." You say, "I felt defensive, based on the words you chose to use, while talking to me in anger. And part of that is based on how I choose to take certain words as 'flags'. But now that we are calm, and can put those words aside, let's forget about the emotions behind them and see if we can discuss the issue at hand rationally."

Long story short, though, all that family therapy didn't help and my mother ended up divorcing my step-dad and we've never seen him since.

However, the teachings of that therapist are slowly coming back to me.

And the training I received in my ten years at one of my jobs (win-win negotiations, customer service, etc.) are too.

I don't want to fight anymore. I don't want to triangulate I don't want to choose sides and camps.

I want to have mutual respect for differing points of view, and I want discourse that doesn't include derogatory statements nor name-calling.

There is a way to talk about things without getting nasty and personal, or siding with others above everyone else involved in a discussion.

For instance, instead of saying, "Ruta, you're a one-track minded ass and your followers are just like you, and I hate the venom you all spew and I hate you for belittling me and making me feel stupid even though you said I seem well educated......", I could say, "Ruta, I like a lot of your artwork and you and I see the wars the same way and let's talk about how you think Obama is so wrong while we also talk about what he's done RIGHT. And then let's take it from there and think of ways where we could encourage our government to do THIS or THAT, or improve upon THAT or THIS but let's also keep reminding ourselves of a president's limitations and remember that our congress and corporations are screwing you and me both over twice-fold.". And we could maybe open up a dialogue where Ruta and I could start a bunch of comments from others piping in, agreeing or disagreeing with us, but keeping it civil and respectful and full of ideas. And maybe those ideas could lead us to some solutions.

Can we all please try, this month of August when Congress is on vacation, to do it? To let go of all the past history and all the feelings we have about each other here at the Cafe, and try to have honest discourse without any hurtful things being said to one another? Can we try to come together and share ideas about what we want Congress to do between now and November?

I'll do my best to start us off. Starting now. I will keep a civil tone and keep discourse open instead of holding old resentments and hurts against those who never meant to hurt me personally but simply disagreed with what I had to say.

I'm not asking you to agree with my beliefs, btw. I'm just asking everyone at TPM Cafe Readers Posts to try to talk things out with a civil tone, for just one month, and to come up with some solutions to our real-life problems while hashing things out on a non-personal level.

Can we at least try?

Avalon

2010-07-25T04:59:55Z

Dick and I were just chatting tonight about Avalon. Not only the excellent Roxy Music song and album, but of course Avalon and the Arthurian legends. The Mists of Avalon (Orlando's favorite book). Viviane, Igraine, Morgause, Morgana, Guinevere, et. al. The apple orchard.

Excalibur the film, somewhat cheesy, was still a very heady and fun film, yes no?

And Roxy Music videos were just as cheesy, but beautiful.

Hey, it's Saturday night and TPM is quiet, just thought I'd toss a few apples out there, hee.

Y'all enjoy the links and have a great weekend.

And thank you, Mr. Day, for inspiring this.

A Message to TPMDC Members Who are Friends With Marinus, and a Message to Others Who are Not

2010-07-23T02:29:05Z

Chameleon, did he give you my email address like I asked him to? I told him you sound like someone I could definitely be friends with, and asked him to pass it on to you.

Hobbes, thank you for coming to Chat that night and letting us all get to know you. Good luck this coming year with your studies. As I said, I think you're going places.

Lars, I always appreciate your comments at DC and am now following you.

Rider, same to you but you comment so much I can't follow you because you clog up my dashboard.

Ruta, nowhere in Marinus' invitation to the bar in Malibu did he mention any ill intent towards you, as you are very well aware. He simply invited you to talk to him in person. Scream in his face, is how he put it. Seeing as how you are addicted to the Bold and Italic buttons in Movable Type, I can see where someone could read your posts in a screaming tone if read aloud.

Quinn and Gasket and others, you all read way too much into that interaction.

Wendy Davis, please don't psychoanalyze me and comment about my being in love with uniforms or anything else. You don't know me and never will.

Bwak, I apologize profusely for jumping into the thread without reading all the comments from the top. You were absolutely right to call me out on that. And I am sorry.

To those who were offended by Marinus' language, I'm not going to apologize for him, nor should I have to defend my friendship with him. I can be friends with whomever I damn please and don't need anyone at some internet website judging me for my heart.

Okay, I feel better now.

Lock Step

2010-07-10T05:27:20Z

A few weeks ago, maybe it was a month ago...another former Republican and I in the Cafe were told that perhaps we are too used to the Republican ways to be real Democrats.

We're too used to following our party lock step.

I cannot tell you how much that hurt me.

]]>
For me to walk away from my family's party just a few years ago, at my age, and move towards "yours", it was a huge step.

But now I'm left wondering just what is "your" party? What did I join?

Some of you act as though I have no right to be here. I never thought I'd find that, on the left. Ever. I thought this was the liberal, progressive party. I thought this was the big tent where I'd feel at home after coming to grips with my true beliefs (pro choice, pro LGBT, anti-war, anti-DADT, etc.).

I find resilience and anger and vitriol from a party I thought was all-encompassing, embracing and accepting of many different attitudes and beliefs. Simply for liking and being proud of my President who I helped vote into office, and standing up against the deepest of criticism towards him, I'm called an "Obama-bot". I've come to take pride in that, which just gets me laughed at further.

Well, please explain to me who you all would rather have in office? Laugh all you want but tell me who you would rather have in office come 2012? I've asked before, in not so mild terms, and was given two names out of over 200 comments.

And please tell me how you think your party of choice, whether it be Dem or Green, will win in November this year when the only "lock step" party around is banding together as usual with messages that make no sense to US but get played over and over again in the MSM and win in the polls? Please explain to me why the Dems can't start getting lock step too?

Please explain to me, again, how your big tent party who laughs at newcomers like me will win? Please explain to me, again, how your big tent party with no clearer message than the Tea Party can come up with, will win.

Please.

Do tell.

Anti Corporations. YES! I'm with you. ANTI War. YES! I am with you. PRO people. YES! I am with you. PRO unions. YES! I'm with you.

Lock freakin' step.

So why can't you be with me?

This Is a Public Service Announcement

2010-07-05T00:28:06Z

With guitar!!!!!!!

Marinus and anyone else awake and on the PC, come join us in Chat.

It's always fun to meet new people.

On God, Jobs, And Everything Else

2010-07-03T08:40:49Z

Okay, first, before God and Job, and jobs....there's cats.

Cats don't trust easily. I had a feral cat named Jupiter that used to jump into my lap every night when I got home from work, and stick his nose into mine, and demand kisses. My ex-BF used to be jealous. But then I found out that the ex-BF used to shoot rubber bands at Jupiter when I wasn't looking. For no reason at all, except for target practice, or kicks.

That's why the ex-BF is an ex-BF.

But that's beside the point.

]]>
But I took them home anyway. Two days after I got them home, Wallace allowed me to rub his belly. Any cat lover should know that cats don't usually let their bellies get rubbed. But Wallace let me do it right away. Two years later and finally his brother Willie lets me do it too. (But Willie, unlike Wallace, still won't let me pick him up for long, in my arms, and also won't sit in my lap - believe me, I'm workin' on it).

Friends of mine dismissed Jupiter as being feral (as did the Vet) and friends of mine say Willie and Wallace are also unfit for human company because they hide under the bed when people come over. Sure, it's taken Bwak and her daughter five visits, now, to get Willie and Wallace comfortable enough to come out from under my bed and sniff them, and sit in the same room. But....progress is progress, no?? I know that Wallace has trusted me enough to let me rub his belly since the second day he came home to me, from the shelter. And I know it took his brother Willie two years to do the same.

Which leads me to my next point. I lost my job last year. I've been unemployed since September of 2009. And I'm kinda lucky, because a lot of people have been out of work longer. And, up until near the end of June, I had unemployment benefit insurance giving me $400 a week. Of course it's not the same as what I used to take home per week, and it doesn't pay the rent and keep me fed all in one month, but, it was income. which is more than I've had these past two weeks.

Which leads me to my real point.

There are those that trust.

There are those, like me, who simply trust in all that life has to offer and who believe that life will turn out okay, no matter what. Even if we see the skies darken, and our fellow citizens scream and shout about skies darkening and falling down around us. Even when we see terrible things happen to our natural resources, our oceans, our coasts. Even when we see common folks like ourselves get raped by corporations, lose everything we love the most. Even when we see injustices day after day after freaking day. Even then.

It's not that I'm a blissfully ignorant Christian, and so can therefore be glad that God loves me and is punishing everyone else (ignorant in my so-called bliss). It's not that I'm an angry Muslim and want the US to be punished, because Muslims don't wish, nor pray, for anyone's downfall. It's not that I'm a happy Buddhist either, because I'm definitely too drawn to the web to be a Buddhist. (This last part, on religion, was for DugFMJul or whatever the hell his name is, btw - but then again, it goes for anyone).

I simply know that I've lasted this long, and I am happy.

And the earth has lasted far much longer than any one given religion ever could. And those of you still on this earth have lasted too. And, regardless what you hear in the news - we're gonna keep on lasting. Until the news get fucking tired of us lasting. Or they get tired of talking. I'm not sure which.

I didn't lay down right away, and show my belly to Obama. He didn't see my vulnerable belly until long after he got into the White House. THAT is when I lost my job. It had nothing to do with him, though, and more to do with me and the economy. Turns out, there's another girl in the office willing to do my job for less pay, and she's had better luck than me. When I helped push Obama in to the White House, I had a job and thought I always would have a job.

Now that I don't have a job, I still love my President and I have no regrets. Case closed.

But tummy open.

Always open. Always open to new beliefs, new viewpoints. New loves.

Closing ones' mind is like closing off your belly. You will miss so much love. So many new experiences. So many huge thoughts that overwhelm. So much beauty. Closing ones' mind and saying no is like denying love, denying growth. Closing ones' mind and not accepting any other viewpoints, any other trains of thought, is like denying sunshine, and becoming stagnant.

Of course I accept viewpoints other than my own. I have rec'd and commented at many of the ones I don't agree with, at heart. But this is July. November comes so soon. There is so much at stake.

I'm almost broke, and maybe by November I'll be living out of my car. Or maybe I'll be working. Or maybe I'll have enough income to get by thanks to Unemployment. Either way, I know I'm going to back each and every Democrat I can back.

The alternative, to me, is unthinkable.

And I'd rather show my belly and give my back, than turn my back and have my belly ripped wide open.

Srsly.

The Piece Party

2010-06-27T23:39:01Z

This weekend I drove up to PA to celebrate the birthdays of my mother and my 10-year-old niece. I got to visit with my two sisters and my mother and my niece - and for a brief time, my nephew. During the visit, we invariably got to discussing politics, because my family is pretty interested in politics. We don't always agree, of course, but we do love to talk.

We all came to the agreement that Washington is too deeply entrenched in special interests, money, and power. It was harder, however, to come up with any answers. My one sister made a great comment about how she wants to start her own party, perhaps calling it the Piece Party. She'd take pieces from the Dems here, pieces from the Libertarians there, pieces from the Green Party, pieces from the Republican party, that make sense. Everything else will be tossed.

We all found ourselves agreeing on which pieces to save, and what we want to see. Problem is, it ain't gonna happen.

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Like, I was telling someone in Chat recently that when I was a kid, I misunderstood Paul McCartney and thought Penny Lane's chorus went, "And Elaine is in my ears, and in my heart...". My mother had a best friend named Elaine and I truly thought, when I was little, that the song was about her.

My eldest niece used to get lyrics confused as a kid too. For some reason she'd sing along with Michael Jackson, "Billy Jean is not my chair!". There used to be a radio ad we'd hear on the car radio a lot about a store on Long Island called "The General". They had this jingle that went something like, "For tables and chairs, and household repairs, you can't beat The General." But my niece would sing instead, "You can't feed the jungle!". I heard her sing that and suddenly an entire song lyric/poem wound around in my head. I wrote it down the minute we got home from our road trip, back when I was in my late teens. Still have it here:

Can't Feed the Jungle

I'm waiting in the tall grass
for a dream to reappear
I've often tried to find it
perhaps it's waiting here

How suddenly we lose things
they never do return
You can wait a whole damn lifetime
but the candle just won't burn

You can't feed the jungle
it grows on its own
I'd never question a miracle
leave destiny alone

A hungry cat is waiting
I'll fall into her lair
and no one's here to save me
my cries lost on thin air

But somewhere someone's watching
I might be saved at last
an old reminder comes to me
from my long-forgotten past

You can't feed the jungle
it grows on its own
I'd never question a miracle
leave destiny alone

Neil Young was another dude who's lyrics I used to get confused. His song "Helpless", I used to sing "Help us, help us help us, help us."

In talking with my family over the weekend, I can't help but mistake those lyrics all over again. I feel somewhat helpless, and yet want someone to help us.

I want a Piece Party, I want a Peace Party, I want a piece of the pie. But no one can agree on which pieces to pull from each party, no one can agree anymore on what peace is, and everyone is eating from a different pie. It's sort of like those misheard lyrics. Everyone kinda hears something different. None of us can quite agree on things because we all have different filters that we process reality with.

I'm thinking campaign finance reform should be the piece we start with. I'm thinking it's time to focus all our energies and different opinions on the one thing that might help make a difference with so many other things.

I'd like to hear you all chime in on what campaign finance reform means to you, what it should look like, and what you know about it.

I'd really appreciate hearing everyone's thoughts on this topic. Please share your piece of the puzzle - please speak your piece. And here's hoping we can keep it peaceful. Thanks so much.

Bless You

2010-06-20T05:55:24Z

Went into Manhattan yesterday. Met a new and now beloved friend. Attended Paul Winter's Summer Solstice concert with my new friend at 4 fucking 30 in the morning, amen. ]]>
We sat together and waited for the lights to dim and the music to start. The lights did finally dim, and the music did finally start. The lone, lonely sound of a soprano saxophone. The gentle lilt of a Japanese flute adding voice. The timid beat of a drum, from somewhere in the front of the church. The tickling tease of a note or two playing on the ivories.

The total hush, the total dark, of a huge and slightly chilly church, at 4:45 AM. And then the mellow music growing, as the windows start glowing. And the audience, still still, and waiting, but breathing easier, somehow. Knowing that the light is coming, and that the music will build into the inevitable crescendo.

And it does, it does. Percussion, vocals, even a mad dash on the organ (which, given the fact that we're in a church, makes sense, but somehow the organ is SO mad at one point that I both feel oppressed by the sound of the church organ, and yet feel freed by its madness - as if the organist is defying the psalms and introducing the soulfulness of improvisational jazz to it's austere echo chamber...but, eventually it almost grates. I preferred the percussion instead - and so did my friend, and we decided later that that was the highlight of the concert - but, I digress).

At long last, the sun is blazing through the cathedral's windows and every stain of the stained glass is showing its true beauty, and the music has brought the audience to its feet.

My friend and I leave and discuss. We sleep. We awaken much later than we mean to, and talk over eggs and coffee at mid-day. We finally leave each other as the sun goes down, promising to stay in touch....knowing that we will. The good will and ease of talk and friendship has brought us both such joy.

And I go to the subway line intent on getting to Grand Central Station and an early train home. But the Metro Pass machine wants to fuck with my head. It demands cash only. I have no cash. I see a bank across the street, and make the $3 transaction to grab a $20 with my debit card. I head back to the subway station and feed my $20 bill in for a subway ride that costs under $5. The machine refuses me still. It doesn't have enough change.

I sort of feel so frustrated that I start to talk to strangers. They all seem to feel frustrated right back. But one nice man tells me there's a kiosk right around the corner where I can get change. I go outside to the kiosk and the man there tells me he has only singles at this point. I take them. I go back inside to the unfriendly little Metro Card machines and feed one of them singles, and get my long-awaited golden ticket to ride the subway.

Heading downtown towards Grand Central on the subway I'm surrounded by happy couples, clinging more to each other than to the bars and handles that most people hold to keep their balance. And I start to smile. The frustration leaves me as I see these people communicate with knowing glances, a stroke on the cheek, a kiss, a wink. Love abounds. It makes me think.

I get out at Times Square and decide to avoid the short shuttle to Grand Central. I decide to walk outside instead. 7th Ave, 6th Ave, walk, walk, walk....

When I'm in the city I put a face on. It's not my usual face. It's a blank stare, straight ahead, I'm a woman walking quickly with a purpose and she wants to help no one nor make friends. It's a face that doesn't come naturally but I wear it well because you just never know what the fuck might come up and you always kinda want to be prepared to just keep walking. I walk fast, my long legs loping, keeping my rhythm going by listening to my iPod Shuffle shuffle songs my way at will.

I get near Grand Central, just one short block to go, and I see this misshapen man sitting against a lamp post, just to the right of me. He's got the "I'm homeless and just ask for your help" cardboard sign sitting on his lap. He's staring straight ahead and shaking slightly. Only a few feet away from him is another man standing with the same kind of sign, staring down at the sidewalk. In front of me are people madly dashing towards the train station, and others determinedly walking out of it.

No one is paying either of these men any attention.

I stop, midtrack. Probably pissed off the people who were marching along behind me on my fast track towards GC. They suddenly have to move around me, as I suddenly stand there, looking at the man with legs far too short for his body, leaning against the lamppost. I walk over to him, my hand in my pocket, reaching for the singles I know I have there. He sees me, looks up into my face, and - without even knowing whether I'll just pass him a single dollar bill, or Willy Wonka's Golden Ticket, this man beams at me - BEAMS, with a smile that just touches my heart - and says, "God Bless you! God bless you, ma'am."

I find that I've dug up a single and a fiver. Being unemployed, I suppose I should put the fiver back. But, Jesus Christ, this man is beaming at me, and thanking me, and as I hand the six dollars to him, he's fervently wishing me a happy weekend and a happy LIFE. Telling me that the Lord's gonna remember what I just did.

I said, "Thank you."

He wished me a good weekend, and I told him,"It already is."

And then I had to walk by that other guy, with the sign, and I didn't reach into my pocket that time.

And then I looked up at the tops of the buildings there at Madison and 42nd and started to cry. Because I can't help them all, and I can't even help myself. But, my weekend has been blessed.

And I just want everyone to know what that means.

In all of its entirety.