HOMO-LOVING LEFT MUST BE STOPPED! Further ammunition to aid in our Crusade for Christ-Approved Marriages ONLY!
I had a vision (a disturbing one at that! let's just say I will never look at a size 28 wedding dress the same way again!) earlier today and it told me that we must re-visit Reverend Ezikeil's post http://tpmcafe.talkingpointsmemo.com/talk/blogs/crazedandconfused/2009/04/more-proof-we-must-never-let-t.php#comments
regarding those gay's trying to marry one another. Rev. Zeke posted a list (see below) and WE, THE CHRIST WARRIORS, MUST USE IT AS AMMUNITION TO FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT!
I have been adamantly against 'the gays' being permitted to marry their soul-mates since the issue was brought to my attention a few months back. Not until I read the list in Reverend Ezekiel's post (thank you again Rev!) was I able to truly understand why I felt so strongly against it. I just knew I hated it, I hated it a lot!
I spend the majority of my days calling into NPR, and posting/responding to blogs and message boards about this abomination. Since being put on SSI for chronic fatigue six years ago I have nothing but time! Time I spend trying to fight the good Lord's fight! Time I spend trying to get the message out that being different is wrong! Period! Now that the Lord has so graciously enlightened me (through the good Rev.'s post) the next time I'm confronted by some dirty liberal as to why my outlook seems so narrow I will be able to fire back with one of these gems! And now, thanks to me, you can too!
I can't tell you how many times a day I have some low-life big-city hipster try to debate me on this unnatural marriage issue! Prior to having this list in hand, my only argument has been that the bible says it's wrong and therefore it is! Granted, this SHOULD be THE ONLY argument that is EVER needed for ANYTHING, EVER! Shockingly, just as I am sure you have witnessed; unsaved, hell-bound souls just don't want to just accept this!
Nope, those left-wing, deviant, homos always want to argue! "Where does it say that?" they ask. "Doesn't it also say that if a woman has sex during her period she should be stoned to death? If God made us in his image does that mean that he is gay too? Aren't all sins created equal and isn't it a sin to judge others? Isn't that what YOU are doing right now? SINNING?! Is God angry that you are trying to take over his job of righteous/hateful/all-knowing/judge of humanity?'
Ridiculous arguments. Satan's arguments.
They say, "Kala, why are you so obnoxiously vocal about a subject you know nothing about? Kala, why have you done absolutely zero research prior to spewing your thought"? Oh they think they are so smart! They think they are better than me! Just because I grew up in a trailer with an alcoholic mom, absentee father, and had to bring government cheese to school for lunch. Guess what though butt-pirates?! I was saved! And you weren't! Who will be laughing on Judgement Day you communist fags?! Who will be laughing then?! Oh golly, I can't wait for Judgement Day!
I apologize for that rant. That was the devil trying to destroy all the good work that Jesus is doing in my life.
I will pray that everyone can be saved like I have been. That they too can know the peace and sheer joy this amazing gift has brought me!
My brothers and sisters, this all important fight to save OUR marriage continues! We are now freshly armed Warriors! Armed with an arsenal of righteous reasons as to why THE GAYS SHOULD NOT MARRY! Quote them often as I have begun to do. Next time the devil/'a liberal' puts you to the test quote any of them! I am especially fond of #3 - Gay marriage leads to pet marriage! OH PRAISE YE, THAT YE WILL SURE SHUT THOSE FILTHY CARPET MUNCHERS RIGHT UP!
I almost feel sorry for them! Those damned, dirty shameful, pathetic, sinners. ALMOST. OH, LOL! ;-)
Friends in Christ, USE THIS GIFT I HAVE BESTOWED ON YOU OFTEN AND FREELY!
I will pray that we complete our mission of never letting those twisted heathens know the total and complete bliss that is marriage! Never let them legally wed their beloved and then we can chastise them for living in sin! Oh the JOY!
Kala ✞
1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in the world.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.
Gay marriage leads to pet marriage!
So true, and you know it won't stop there and soon we will join the rest of the heathen world and sanction man/goat marriages, we must stop this moral descent now!
May 7, 2009 11:39 AM | Reply | Permalink
Oh - those pesky evangelicals. We know Evangelical Christians don't generally believe in science - but don't you just LOVE it how they IMMEDIATELY shifted the argument when it became clear that homosexuality is not a "phase", or some disease you get from listening to too much Cher. As soon as science was able to show that for the most part - you are either born gay or straight - they just said "Well, even if you are born that way - you just have to live celebite."
I'm a happily married straight man. I believe marriage should be nothing more than a 7 year contract (and ya - Austrailia - I said it WAY before you started saying it). I'm an atheist who has said some of the nastiest things about the church, religion, and Christians I could drum up in my sick mind. But I can get married?
Most homosexuals haven't done NEARLY as much - if anything to blemish the church or Christianity - but they are the abomination who can't marry the ones they love?
Ya - that makes great sense. Another BRILLIANT decision at the hands of Christians! (and those fucking mormons for that matter).
May 7, 2009 2:32 PM | Reply | Permalink
"Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning."
Um...really?
You can call me cool Poindexter.
May 7, 2009 5:24 PM | Reply | Permalink
Well I am really american... I don't know how you can account for the fact that I am not a christian nor do I think people need any books in their lives in order to be good fellow citizens. It's through our actions that our true character is revealed.
Homosexuality is not going anywhere. You can hate it, spit about it, and spend as much energy as you like disliking it. It's not going anywhere. If people want to be in a committed relationship with each other... well I think that's their business. It is no reflection on me. Again I have a very deep understanding of spirituality. I have met spiritual teachers from all over the world and attended integral spirituality conferences. I have a very deep spiritual understanding.
And I would say that to be honest with you. I feel it is very selfish and not what people seem to claim christianity is about, to deny people the right to marry each other or live a lifestyle that suits them. Selfish, bottom line. So maybe that's the lesson that may take millions of years to learn, not sure. But I respect your right to believe in all sorts of things as long as you don't infringe on my right to freedom or religion and you don't infringe on the rights of others.
To me it is just one of the current forms of bigotry justified by parts of the poplution joining together in shared bigotry. Go back and read what people used to say and do to black people... it might actually open your eyes.
By the way if you wanted to go with what is natural with regards to marriage... it would not exist because men are instinctively driven to have as many partners as possible and women are not... the 'natural' instincts of procreation are not in support of marriage period.
May 7, 2009 5:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
BTW if this was supposed to be snark... it was too real in the way I actually know of people who would seriously say all of this...so it failed fro my perspective... if...
May 7, 2009 10:15 PM | Reply | Permalink
You know some dumb ass people, friend. Dumb ass people.
May 8, 2009 2:22 AM | Reply | Permalink
Yes, it was intended as satire. Unfortunately, it seems I missed the mark.
These opinions are so antithetical to my own that it did not occur to me that it could possibly be taken seriously.
I am sickened by these opinions and this way of thinking. SICKENED!
I need to clarify and get it out into the Universe, that ALL remarks were made in an attempt to highlight their ignorant, nonsensical, bigoted/intolerant nature.
I apologize if I was unable to convey my intent.
May 8, 2009 5:40 AM | Reply | Permalink
Kala - you didn't miss the mark. Sometimes sarcasm is just lost on people. Continue mocking the douchebags of the World.
I don't think a day has gone by where I haven't laughed about your "vegarians killed Jesus" stuff.
Fucking Priceless!
May 9, 2009 1:27 AM | Reply | Permalink