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Week of November 9, 2008 - November 15, 2008

Buying a used car. Company. Or three.


In 1908, the Ford Motor Company introduced the exciting new Model A passenger car. This roomy, zoomy (up to 30 mph!) newfangled contraption was meant to put the horse out of work, and actually put the country to work. Henry Ford's 'Assembly Line' made it possible for an average of almost 600 per year to roll away from the plant, and the base price was $750. An optional rubber roof ($30) could be upgraded to the luxe leather roof for another $20. Children were still learning to read by Whale Oil Lamps. By about 1930, the Car was born. The second generation of Model A got 40 miles per gallon of fuel. The 1908 Model T got 25 mpg. (This is an editorial. Look here for a report)  Several colors were available too.  I won't spend time on it, but Oyster Grey may be the most important advance in the current era. Thank you, Audi.

In every year of my life, I have ridden in a car at least once a week. They come in all shapes and sizes, just like Americans.

We took 'one for the road', and we didn't wear seatbelts. In the 1970s, Ford reacted decisively to changes in production and design in Japan, whose little rice burners were starting to take market share by being interesting to look at, inexpensive to feed, and light on maintenance. They realized the world was changing when the Arab Oil Embargo made us jockey for position in the gas lines. Ford introduced the Pinto and the Mustang II, relabeling themselves 'the Small Car Company'. I have a Mustang II in my garage. It has a 302 cubic inch V8 engine and weights almost 4,000 pounds. THIS is what mine looks like, only waaaay cooler.

We can argue about accessories, safety features and emissions controls and their role in keeping that mileage down, but the Disco 'stang referenced above gets about 4 gallons to the mile without the AC on. It has cranks to open the windows, no rear defrost, acoustic side view mirrors and door locks. The NHTSA's CAFE standards were introduced in the mid-'70s:  18 miles per gallon. CAFE is meant to influence fuel economy, but like most regulatory constructs ends up in the hands of industry lawyers and their representatives in Congress, and turned to the advantage of Wall Street. These are the regulatory details turning a truck into an SUV when a station wagon is mounted on a truck chassis. 

Meanwhile, Japan and Europe continue to exist. Despite abysmal performance in the stock market, despite flagging demand, despite the second, third and fourth empty seat in every car surrounding you in the am traffic jam, US car companies promote the dozens of cup holders as competitive advantages. Despite 0% financing (yes, it happened) and employee discounts for the general public, they can't sell the number of cars they produce.

When I bought (leased) my first new car, I noted with shock the Volkswagen TDI engine, rated in excess of 50mpg of diesel. That was ten years ago.

In Japan, I fell in love with a weird little car called the Daihatsu. It looks similar to the Cooper Mini (introduced in 1959, kids), which gets about 30 mpg. The Mercedes 'Smart' gets about 30 here. Everybody is maxing out around 30 in the US. Why? They get 60 mpg in Europe.

Because the American Love Affair with the automobile now exists to consume gasoline, and keep voters working. Back to that traffic jam: Have you ever seen someone you know in parked traffic? Have you ever seen a full car? Does anybody turn off their engine?

I knew a guy who escaped from Croatia. He turned his car off at red lights. The socialists were taught to understand consumerism: You have to pay for resources, which are finite. Your tank holds Xgallons, those gallons cost X dollars, and they are only supplied by ... rotten precambrian vegetation, which has been discontinued by the Manufacturer.

What I'm getting at is this: $25,000,000,000 is too much to pay for a used car- any used car. And today's technology as practiced in the midwest is every bit as fossilized as the fuel infrastructure we depend on and suffer from. Even Bush said we're 'addicted' to oil, and he's clearly a somewhat trained chimp. I'm turning the page. I want the electric car. I want conservation. Bugs Bunny, famously, used to hold up signs saying,"Is this trip really necessary?" in the 1940s. Today, millions of excess functionaries commute an hour, consuming a few gallons of gasoline EACH, and produce nothing of value at work.

So now, while the economy is in dive mode, as we are all preparing for the shock of life after Wall Street's Frat Party and the decade of unbridled RNC libido, it is time for these towers to fall. Just like the IT and Biotech sectors, the big, inefficient and unproductive Big Three are ready to be cannibalized by their talented engineers, inventors, floor workers, sales people and strategists to give us something that comes next. Let's just do it. Ouch.

You think $25,000,000,000 will do it? Like the $300,000,000,000 fixed the banks? Pschaw!

I recommend we reserve fossil fuel for air, rail and hauler travel (jet engine particulate is buffering global warming). I recommend we work and spend closer to home, online, in our starving towns and states. I recognize, as you do, that we're on the edge of a big, big shakeout of redundants. But the only way that Wall Street mess will affect you is by reducing the supply of options at your local store. Wall Mart may be forced to pay cash to import boxcars of plasma televisions from Korea, and those Peruvian Yams might not make it to the ACME.

I'd rather increase local farming, production and retail than give the Big Three (read: Wall Street) another dime to waste on defending the status quo.


Thank you, Senator McCain.


The Republican Governors Association met in their annual get-together, and had the singular honor of being fronted by the governor of a state with less than a half-million voters, not counting the oil industry. Their 670,000 people put them at about the magnitude of a North Dakota. By contrast, Maine has 1.3 million residents. Alaska: 1.1 persons per square mile. Maine: 79.6. With so many people living together, ME had no delegate to the RGA meeting, but the relatively few encounters with American humans may explain Palin’s horrible small-town beauty queen demeanor.

The Repubs are already glum, but with Palin out in front they risk another crush in the mid-terms and in ‘12, as she outlines her intention to push back and impede the new administration’s agenda. They should look forward to some help, but she sounds like they expect to gain popularity by obstructing the Obama mandate. She drank the Kool-Aid- she thinks only the wings should vote Republican (I agree with her?), and that the RNC will accrue supporters by increasing exclusion.

But Sarah Palin was the coup d’grace, the last straw in McCain’s masterful plan to take a dive with honor. He effectively got the RNC out of the way, at a time when thoughtful people of all stripes need to come together to start a bucket brigade, everybody pitching in to haul the muck out of the Capitol as the “President” is led out of town, finally capping the decade-plus of RNC hegemony. Only McCain’s successful failure could ensure legislative opportunities for compromise, ensuring some opportunity for Republican influence, and he could only fail by succeeding. He acquiesced to the North Pole of his party in his VP choice as he would in his cabinet and everything else he’d do as president. Would have done- he’s not going to be President. Whew.

I choose to believe that the senator is now stumping for Chambliss, using the same base-only rhetoric he used to sink his campaign, because he knows the demographics simply do not favor that base, the fringe, the frontier. Somehow Georgia (9.5M, 79 people/mile2) is trending psychologically reverse (backward?). But Palin was perfect, snowmobiling all the way from that frontier. In case you missed it, she’s some kind of rugged woodsman, but smarmy, hostile, condescending, unintelligible, the human-interest prima donna with mooseburgers. And a hockey mom.

My dad used to yell at the Flyers so hard it kept us up at night. To see him at my little brother’s hockey games was to watch a man transform, from scalp to collar, into thirteen pounds of throbbing veins. But everyone involved in keeping youth hockey alive in the US and Canada is seriously very insane, even before they start demonizing Drosophila research and pushing teen parenthood. My mom will kick your ass.

No, Sarah, Fruit Flies don’t match the ‘Are Squirrels Gay’ research, although that was a valuable question too (the answer is,”sometimes”, by the way). It’s called molecular genetics and developmental biology, it represents hope, another way forward in health as we age and evolve, and it’s over your head. Things can’t be over the Executives’ heads any more, and they won’t be for at least the next four years, in part due to the heroic work of Senator McCain, who deserves to sleep soundly at night. His service to this country, taking a bullet for us all, even the party that treats him badly, makes him a good role model, and I hope our next President leverages his wisdom.

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