I cannot claim to be an expert in any field except the cab industry, and even then, my experience is limited to the industry as it is practiced in Madison, Wisconsin, although I've spoken to cabbies in other parts of the country as well.

Even with this limited experience, I can offer some tips (excuse the pun) to people who ride in taxicabs or ever want to get a taxicab to take them somewhere. Let us first start with the DON'Ts:

1. DON'T ever mention robbery or crime to a cabbie. It makes them nervous. Don't ask them if they've ever been robbed or if they worry about being robbed. The answer in both cases is likely to be "Yes" and they get jumpy when passengers bring the topic up because it makes them think YOU are going to rob them.

2. DON'T call a cab company to request a taxi if you don't have exact addresses of where you are and where you are going and how many people in your party. Every company is slightly different, but ALL of them need to know where you are exactly, where you are going exactly, and how many people. They will also need a working phone number and a name. Don't call them until you have all the proper information. Depending on the company, if you call up and start babbling to your friends: "How many of us are going?" while the taxi man/woman is on the phone, they may just hang up on you.

3. DON'T be an asshole. If you are drunk and obnoxious, the cabbie will kick your ass to the curb. If you are some privileged little shit from a wealthy family and you think you can treat a cab driver like your private little servant, he/she will pull over and kick your privileged little ass out of the car. Your money don't mean shit to cabbies if you're an asshole, got that?

4. DON'T ask a cabbie to do something illegal for you because you might be talking to an undercover cop.

5. DON'T touch a cab driver. Some cabbies have been robbed, and you might end up with a knife in your face if you put a hand on one. The only time you should have any physical contact with your cab driver is when you hand them a tip.

Which brings me to the DO part of this blog:

1. DO tip your cabbie. I suggest that if you happen to get a friendly, polite, clean, knowledgeable, safe and honest cabbie, tip generously. They are bucking the stereotype of cabbies everywhere and it's good karma to reward them.

2. DO feel free to ask your cabbie questions about the city you are in. If you are lucky enough to get a cabbie like the one mentioned above, you will get a little history lesson and tips on where you can get a good meal, among other lore. Some cabbies like to feel they are encyclopedias on wheels.

3. DO feel free to call a company and complain if you experience a bad driver. Safety is a big thing with many companies, since their insurance rates are based on such factors. I've had bad cab drivers myself, including one that was drunk, so I don't have any problem ratting out a bad one. They give the good ones like me and my co-workers a bad name.

4. DO feel free to call and compliment a driver if you get an exceptionally good one. In many companies, that helps toward a higher rate of commission for drivers.

Thanks for reading this, and I hope everyone had an enjoyable Halloween.