Yup! I meant to spell that with a "P" because I am fond of acronyms. Pig Oil stands for Petroleum Is God, Opposing Individual Liberty. I know it doesn't really have a ring to it, but it is certainly more then enough to start a post here!
What really stuck in my craw today originated in Louisiana, where's craw is always followed by dad, or, at least as long as we can keep the oil away from the places where crawdads live dad follows craw. Louisiana is also where the Governor has just sold out, not just rented out, SOLD OUT. Oh, I know the Jolly Jindal is using strong language and an irritated tone. It kind of surprised me to hear a Republican going rogue, I mean really, really rogue, and barking at BP, but then I listened a little closer and realized that he was being loyal to his corporate leige after all, as is all the rage for Republicans everywhere.
What the hell is Gregor talking about now, you ask? Bobby the Boy Wonder declared that he has approval from the US Government to build a sandy berm, and if BP wasn't going to do it, he would do it himself! Strong words, those. Let me translate. Jindal said, "BP, if it's okay with you and you're not interested in doing it yourself, we would like to build a berm?"
His remarks were an admission of surrender to Big Oil. If you did not know it, Louisiana, your Governor has abandoned the defenses of your state. But don't go feeling all lonely about it. The President did the same thing, damn Kenyan furner that he is. {Okay, that Kenyan furner part was sarcastic. I support Obama in most cases. I do not question his citizenship, but that does not mean I will not criticize him for not making the mystery dispersant, through the bicamerally [I think I just made up a word. Cool, huh?] democratic Congress illegal, and then confiscating everything BP has before they put any more of that lethal substance in the Gulf! But I digress.}
I have to assume something here. I assume the beach, or whereever he wants to build this berm, has no oil on it at this time, or at least, when Jindal jumped up and down with his adamant declaration of timidity, there was no oil in that location at that time. So, if there was no oil, he has forsaken any sovereignty to do whatever he likes with the unspoiled Earth in Louisiana, you know, as Chief Executive of the State. He need not ask BP whether he can build a berm from BP. I would agree he should check with the Army Corp of Engineers. But BP? Really? The Governor of the State of Louisianas needs to ask them if it's okay? You know, he did see the President kind of go like that, so maybe I should cut him some slack, but when did he start following the President's examples about anything? It also boggles my mind why he would even be waiting for their answer, waiting while the oil gets closer to ruining that area for decades to come, the area this berm supposed to protect.
There is a question of liability, which I see everyone dancing around to avoid. First, if there is oil, then NOT letting BP clean it up might prevent financial recovery from BP for any effort made to clean up their oil. Also, if there is oil, then getting in contact with that oil is like going out of your way to fabricate a claim against BP. You see, there's this thing called the Jones Act that states something to the effect that, unless one has property that has had physical contact with oil, there can be no claim. So, maybe, those people will not get any part of the $75 million liability limit. Good to know, too, cuz if I run someone over with my car, and my insurance only covers, say, up to $100,000, cuz I'm such a nice guy and all, and that's what my policy says, then the victim(s) cannot come after my house. It works something like that, right? What, they are an exception?
The contact thing is really a cool tool for BP, too, because it gives them all kinds of power. Like Monsanto's patented seed pollen crossing into a neighbor's field, wheverever it goes, Monsanto owns those folks to a degree. Check out how Canadian Courts gave a share of the neighbor's profits to Monsanto after that farmer had an exceptional crop! Darn it! I'm digressing again, but I think we should call this the Plague Phenomenon, or some such thing. It involves contact with oil. If anyone has contact, or knows where it is, they have to tell BP and then back away, far, far away. Like it has cooties or something. No one can even look at it, evidently. The more is spreads, the more control BP has over any and all property along the Gulf. It's kind of like, their oil touches you, they own you, except there is no Pottery Barn policy here. They break it, they buy it, except you still actually own it and you will pay taxes on it. Pig Oil will just control it and anyone who wants to get near it. Never happened before, but those Pig Oil people, they are exceptional.
As I get tired of writing all this depressing stuff, it occurs to me that I have rep[eatedly used the term exception, or some derivative of that word. {Sorry about the derivative reference. It's still painful, isn't it? How interesting that words are kidnapped by events sometimes. Too soon? Is it too soon to use that term, derivative? DANG! There I go again! Sorry. Back to my exceptional word now.} It seems that the cliches we have for ourselves and, you know, any person, really, do not apply to Pig Oil, which was recently anointed a person, an immigrant person even. Whoa! Good thing they didn't spill any oil in Arizona, huh? Things are bad for immigrants there these days. But are they bad for Pig Oil? Of course not! They are the exception. Get it? That goes for laws too. They are the exeption. Frankly, I think they do Exceptionalism better then the Americans, which, AGAIN, Pig Oil is not. They just use America when it suits them. One might even say, Pig Oil is not aware we are #1! Seriously! There were oil spills in the Gulf of Oman, when we went to war and, for some reason, there were Major oil spills all around then Gulf. Well, those Arabs said they did not want oil in their seas, so a boat was brought in that skimmed up the oil? If we were #1, wouldn't we get that kind of treatment? I mean, just how long does it take to get one of those boats to the Gulf of Mexico anyway? Can't get it cuz Arabs are #1 and every Pig Oil man knows that? Oh. I see.
I was also thinking about how people want to blame the government for this oil spill and I wondered, "How does that work? What if it were me?" I drive like mad through town because I own a cab and the faster I drive, the more money I make. See? Who should slow me down? We're talking making money here!!! Well, I run over 11 people and kill them. My car flips and skids and breaks into innumerable pieces fatally injuring many, many more. But they will not die instantly. The economic damage is immeasurable as well. Can I just say that, even though the speed limits are clearly posted, and I have been stopped many times for speeding, my little accident is the fault of the government? Can I beg for an exception? If I was killing people and destroying the environment all around me, that's how I would want it. It only makes sense now, you know, if it were me. Oh! There's one more thing! Anywhere there is so much as a shard of glass or the smallest chip of paint, any of those places, I want complete control over those areas. No one goes near them, and I get police and other authority figures {Oh, I think figureheads might be a better description of these "authorities"} I want a lot of them around those places to ensure no one gets near them. They are now my exceptional places. And those "government" people, they work for private industry now, because I am so exceptional. What a deal!?!?!? Can I get on that program?
There's another program I want for myself too. I may have another post about it soon, but it's still forming in my head, like a real French mousse, I have something sweet and chocolatey just chilling. It's about the deal we made with the devil. Did we make the terms, or were they forced on us? I mean, in response to the question, "You're buying the oil, aren't you?" Does admitting you are using oil indicate you agree with how Pig Oil does business and treats the environment? Was that something we signed when we filled up our cars? Because, I kind of thought we elected a govenrment to make laws that ensure those seeking oil did so safely. I thought that was how things worked when we had a government, "of the people, by the people, and for the people". I'm just not sure we have that anymore. Hey Bobby? Governor Jindal? What do you think? Louisiana? You got anything to say about that? I know Pig Oil does, and they disagree. Not even respectfully. After all, we just elect politicians, but Pig Oil BUYS them!