You may have heard about Glenn Beck's recent paranoid accusations, but if you are a drive-by voyeur of right-wing hysterics, you might not appreciate the method behind the madness. Relying on out-of-context quotes, tenuous associations, and giant leaps of speculation, Beck has meticulously pieced together the most elaborate, nefarious government conspiracy in the history of cable news. His argument consists of four primary elements:

Part 1: The Czars

"Czar" is not an official title in the Federal government, and it is not printed on anyone's business card. It is a label that journalists and politicians assign to appointed officials in the executive branch, a common practice of Democratic and Republican presidents since F.D.R. Last February, Democratic Senator Robert Byrd criticized President Obama for appointing too many "czars," whom he believed were not sufficiently accountable to Congress. Glenn Beck took up the issue in early June and added his own sinister spin, stating, "A shadow government is giving the Obama administration unprecedented power with virtually no oversight."

More recently, Beck began airing regular segments called "Know Your Czar" in which he digs up the most outrageous biographical details he can find about bureaucrats and advisors in the Obama administration. His favorite bête noir within the Administration has been a man named Van Jones, the Special Advisor for Green Jobs, Enterprise and Innovation at the White House Council on Environmental Quality. (If the length of the title were related to political power, Jones would indeed be a powerful czar.) In his youth, Jones had been a Marxist sympathizer and black activist, but he embraced eco-capitalism in 1990's. Beck, of course, focuses on Jones' Marxist roots, which he has mentioned in almost every broadcast lately. Presenting Jones along with a few more appointees with tenuous connections to socialism and right-to-die movements, Beck argues that the Obama administration is an angry hive of "anti-Capitalist nutjobs" with unchecked political power and radical plans, saying, "There is a revolution, and they think they can get away with it quietly."

In response to controversy over Jones' past statements, he has just resigned. So much for the revolution.

Part 2: The Secret Army

Malevolent Marxist bureaucrats are disturbing, but they're not quite scary enough for a potent conspiracy theory. The evil czars need some muscle to carry out their sinister plans. That muscle takes the form of the fearsome AmeriCorps. Yes, according to Beck's theory, an army of teachers and community activists will establish martial law and suppress dissent. Beck's ammunition comes from a July 2008 campaign speech in which Obama explained his plans to expand AmeriCorps and the Peace Corps, saying, "We cannot continue to rely only on our military in order to achieve the national security objectives that we've set. We've got to have a civilian national security force that's just as powerful, just as strong, just as well-funded." This statement is all the evidence that Beck requires to allege that Obama and his Marxist cohorts intend to use this new "security force" to suppress people like...well...Glenn Beck.

Mr. President, is your civilian national security force to protect us from things the Missouri State Police, your own Homeland Security and the liberal Southern Law Poverty Center have come out and said were a threat: militia groups; tea party goers; folks with "Don't Tread on Me" flags; me; Sarah Palin? Think about this: Is it unreasonable to think this government would ask you to spy on your neighbors, in light of these recent stories?

Beck doesn't offer any context to the quote. Here's Obama's next sentence:

We need to use technology to connect people to service. We'll expand USA Freedom Corps to create online networks where Americans can browse opportunities to volunteer. You'll be able to search by category, time commitment and skill sets. You'll be able to rate service opportunities, build service networks, and create your own service pages to track your hours and activities.

We can see why Beck left out the context; a browsable database of volunteer opportunities just isn't that scary.

Part 3: The Gag

To execute their plan quietly and efficiently, the conspirators need to silence those strident voices of dissent. Their mechanism, Beck charges, is a proposal by Mark Lloyd, chief diversity officer of the FCC, to promote local, minority, and public broadcasters by tightening FCC regulations and taxing media conglomerates:

Our diversity 'czar' has just proposed that radio companies pay 100 percent of their operating budget, yearly. A 100 percent tax which would then be transferred to the state-run radio of NPR. If you can't pay that, you'd lose your license and it would be sold to minority group.

This "proposal" was taken from Lloyd's 2006 book critiquing corporate control of the media. The "100 percent of their operating budget" canard was invented by Matt Cover of CNSNews.com ("The Right News. Right Now."), and it quickly circulated around the conservative end of the blogosphere before Beck added it to his arsenal. Beck fears that Lloyd will use his awesome powers as FCC "diversity officer" to enact legislation that would shut down FOX News and other conservative media outlets:

Speak without fear or more "harmless legislation" will be passed and you will not be able to speak and you will experience the kind of fear that no one in this country has experienced before. All it will take is an "emergency." God help us all.

Which brings us to part 4.

Part 4: The Emergency

Even with the czars and the civilian brownshirts, the Obama administration would need some kind of justification to execute its tyrannical agenda. Beck alleges that the conspirators are planning to manufacture some kind of emergency to provide the catalyst. For instance, discussing Sarah Palin's "death panels," Beck played the history scholar and theorized that economic crisis caused Nazi Germany to institute a eugenics program that murdered tens of thousands. (This theory is known as the Gross Oversimplication Hypothesis.) At the end of the program, Beck darkly mused:

"What are [Obama's health advisors] saying to the president behind closed doors when we aren't there to watch it? I guess we won't know, because we'll all be too focused on the emergency that starts the rationing and the czars don't have to answer to anyone."

In another program, Beck reconceived Joe Biden's infamous gaff: "It will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy." Beck wondered, "Is this civilian national security force just preparing for what Joe Biden predicted?"

Finally, Beck claims that the liberal media will be the mouthpiece through which Obama's czars manufacture the crisis.

"If you watch what could only be called the organizations -- or the administration's organ -- anything involved with GE or NBC; you've got now Jeffrey Immelt on the board of the Federal Reserve, you have in the Oval Office consulting not only on health care but the financial situation, and they are an organ. If you watch MSNBC, I contend that you will see the future, because they are laying the ground for a horrible event that will be... What they're laying the ground for, anything from the right some awful event -- and I fear this government, this administration, has so much framework already prepared that they will seize power overnight before anybody even gives it a second thought."

And there you have it, an easy-bake Fascho-Communist revolution in four simple steps: hire powerful Marxist czars, silence the dissenting voices, manufacture a crisis with the help of the liberal media, and deploy the civilian security force to round up Americans of conscious.

Beck's ratings are up, of course. There's nothing like a juicy end-of-times conspiracy for that exhilarating jitter in the gut and the lump-ditty-lump of pulsing indignation. Taking note of Beck's success, right wing commentators and politicians are jumping on the conspiracy bandwagon. Clear Channel's Jim Quinn praised Beck and decried the "Marxist takeover of the United States." Rush Limbaugh went on Beck's show and warned, "This is statism, totalitarianism versus freedom. And if these people are allowed to go where they want to go unchecked, then some people, a lot of people...will wake up one day and find, "My God, what the hell happened?" Putting her facebook page to good use, Sarah Palin wrote, "Glenn Beck is doing an extraordinary job this week walking America behind the scenes of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and outlining who is actually running the White House."

In the conservative echo chamber, paranoid voices have produced a feedback loop where each apocalyptic alarm bell facilitates another shriller peal of artificial terror. We can look forward to even more elaborate manifestations of the paranoid style from Beck and those he inspires in the days to come.

Update: Articleman offers a counterpoint to media obsession over Beck.

Genghis will speak live about Beck's paranoid theories on Tuesday 9/8 at noon EST / 9am PST with on KRXA 540 AM. [Cross-posted at dagblog.com]