Those who know my writing here are aware that I have little love for Hillary Clinton. Had she won the nomination, I would have voted for her but not happily. But whatever her flaws, Clinton is extremely intelligent. She has a better command of public and foreign policy than any other candidate who participated in the primaries. Barack Obama, of course, is brilliant in his own right, as is Joe Biden.

John McCain is not a complete idiot, but policy details are obviously not his strong suit. Not just economic issues, which he has famously confessed to not understanding, but also foreign affairs, an area in which he has made a number of public gaffes, most notably confusing the religious affiliation of Al Qaeda, repeatedly. Can any of you imagine Clinton or Obama or Biden making the same error? Repeatedly?

And now we have Sarah Palin, the Republican Hillary by virtue of her ovaries. If any Clinton supporters fall for this cynical gender play, then shame on them. For Sarah Palin is in truth the un-Hillary. As Clinton is knowledgable, Palin is ignorant. As Clinton is cerebral, Palin is superficial. As Clinton is brilliant, Palin is, I'm sorry to say, a dumbass.

I hope that as the McCain campaign is forced to let Governor Palin answer questions about something other than motherhood and oil pipleines, a taste of which we've received in the namby-pamby Charlie Gibson interview, her cluelessness will become as obvious as lipstick on a polar bear. Because Governor Palin, I don't know Hillary Clinton, and she's no friend of mine, but I can say with confidence, you're no Hillary Clinton.

with apologies to Sam Cooke

She don't know much about history
She don't believe in biology
She wants to change the science books
She wants to fire the White House cooks
But she does know how to speak on cue
And she knows if she makes fools of you
What a wonderful veep she would be

She don't know much about geography
She don't know much foreign policy
Don't know much about George Bush's war
Don't know what a VP is for
But she knows that one and one is two
And if McCain just tells her what to do
What a wonderful veep she would be

Now she don't claim to want any bridges
But she can sell you one
'Cuz maybe by pretending she never liked bridges
She can win your vote for John

She don't know much about history
She don't believe in biology
She wants to change the science books
She wants to fire the White House cooks
But she knows if she can hide the truth
Until we make it to the voting booth
What a wonderful veep she would be

with apologies to Sam Cooke

She don't know much about history
She don't believe in biology
She wants to change the science books
She wants to fire the White House cooks
But she does know how to speak on cue
And she knows if she makes fools of you
What a wonderful veep she would be

She don't know much about geography
She don't know much foreign policy
Don't know much about George Bush's war
Don't know what a VP is for
But she knows that one and one is two
And if McCain just tells her what to do
What a wonderful veep she would be

Now she don't claim to want any bridges
But she can sell you one
'Cuz maybe by pretending she never liked bridges
She can win your vote for John

She don't know much about history
She don't believe in biology
She wants to change the science books
She wants to fire the White House cooks
But she knows if she can hide the truth
Until we make it to the voting booth
What a wonderful veep she would be