In a moving ceremony today, John Walker Lindh, the "American Taliban" convicted of treason in the wake of the Sept. 11 disaster and resulting war with Afghanistan, handed off the "enemy combatant" t-shirt he has worn for the past eight years to Jake DeSantis, a former employee of AIG Corporation who has refused to return his negotiated compensation, controversially dubbed a "bonus," to American taxpayers, electing to donate the money instead.

"Man, it's weird," opined Lindh in his remarks prior to the presentation. "One day, you're just a feckless kid from Marin County, or an egghead from MIT in Jake's case, out in the world doing what you more or less believe in. The next day history catches up with you and you're in the bright lights with everybody calling you a traitor. I can't say the last eight years have been great for me or that I don't kind of want to scream 'Your turn, asshole!' to Jake. I mean, guys like him are exactly the guys I was trying to fight against. But wearing this Enemy Combatant t-shirt isn't easy, and on a human level I hope he doesn't end up dead or spending 20 years in prison. I'm pretty sure he has more friends in high places than I did, so it doesn't seem likely."

DeSantis, after accepting the Enemy Combatant t-shirt, said only "I bet all you Liberal freaks are thinking 'Hey, what goes around comes around.' I told you I'm giving the money to charity, just like Jesus would have. Now either crucify me or get off my effing back."

No elected officials have yet commented on the event.