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You Know I Never Carry Change


I just charge it
Where do I sign?
Charge it
Show me the dotted line
Charge it
I don’t have the time to waste

Credit-card industry may cut $2 trillion lines

(Reuters) - The U.S. credit-card industry may pull back well over $2 trillion of lines over the next 18 months due to risk aversion and regulatory changes, leading to sharp declines in consumer spending, prominent banking analyst Meredith Whitney said. …

Closing millions of accounts, cutting credit lines and raising interest rates are just some of the moves credit card issuers are using to try to inoculate themselves from a tsunami of expected consumer defaults.

My Astyk-influenced wife is now bugging me to cut back on the credit card. I use it for almost everything, then send off a huge payment every month, telling myself that’s OK, but she’s right of course. Or they’re right. I don’t think as hard about buying extra groceries when it all comes down to a swipe of plastic at the end. I’d gladly use the debit card, but reports of card number hijacking put me in fear of overdrafts and whatnot. For all their flaws, credit cards offer some protection against fraud. And carrying enough cash to pay for gasoline just worries me.

Astyk also noticed that McDonalds “food” has become the second most-charged purchase in the USA. Astyk-Hat also has my wife cutting out meat, replacing it with beans and rice.

Full lyrics to Charge It, by Tim Curry:

Well, you can Telex my accountant
Call up Tele-Credit, too
I know they send a monthly statement
But I’ve never read it through
You say you won’t accept my Visa
Or American Express
The computer is suspicious
‘Cause I’ve got no fixed address
Lady, that’s a valid document
Check out the way I’m dressed!
You know the way I’m feelin’ now,
I’d take a lie-detector test!

Paradise lost for capital gain
Traded for a ticket on the gravy train
I can amortize the cost,
With a minimum of pain
But I need it for a write off,
Can’t take another night off
You know I never carry change….

I just charge it
Where do I sign?
Charge it
Show me the dotted line
Charge it
I don’t have the time to waste
Charge it
Oh, don’t mess around
Charge it
I got to get downtown
‘Cause I promised to deliver
To live up to the letter of the Lord,
I’m in a state of grace
Yeah, Baby, Yeah
Oh! Oh!

Well, I’ve enjoyed us doing business
But I really must confess
This pompous attitute just isn’t calculated to impress
There’s a driver in my car outside
Who’s easily distressed
Lady, when he’s through with you
He’s gonna leave your face a mess!

Paradise lost for capital gain
Traded for a ticket on the gravy train
I can amortize the cost with a minimum of pain
But I need it for a write off
Can’t take another night off
You know I never carry change

I just Charge it
Where do I sign?
Charge it
Show me the dotted line
Charge it
I don’t have the time to waste
Charge it
Oh, don’t mess around
Charge it
I got to get downtown
‘Cause I promised to deliver
To live up to the letter of the Lord,
I’m in a state of grace
There goes that feelin’, Babe

Equal opportunity there!

Charge it
Where do I sign?
Charge it
Show me the dotted line
Charge it
I don’t have the time to waste

Oh, don’t mess around, Babe
Don’t mess around, Babe
Charge it
Where do I sign?
Charge it
Show me the dotted line
I don’t have the time to
Charge it
What is that?
A blue one? I don’t have a blue one!
A red one? I don’t have a red one!
Oh, just that gold one
I don’t know, do they come in platinum?
Oh !
Where do I sign?
I don’t know…
Maybe I can just make my mark…
I don’t know, do you read???
Are you literate, Babe???
Are you numerate, Babe???
Do you get laid, Babe???

I don’t carry green, it’s just…
It makes such a bulge in the pocket
You like the suit?
There’s…there’s something in the piping in the back
I wanted to have changed,
But my Spanish tailor didn’t fly in last week
You know him? He’s called Manuel
But he always makes the pocket so that if you put money in it, It looks so ugly
Oh, cash, Babe
…Cash
Oh, fine! Send for the manager!
You can’t be the manager!
Are you kidding? There’s a serious problem in personnel!


23 Comments

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My Astyk-influenced wife is now bugging me to cut back on the credit card. I use it for almost everything, then send off a huge payment every month, telling myself that’s OK, but she’s right of course. Or they’re right.

"They" are. The problem isn't the cards, it's the debt. Put down the excess groceries, pay the balance every month, and no prob Bob! A bit of extra security (as you noted), delayed-payment (think of all those extra pennies your hard earned $$$ accrue in your savings account while waiting for the payment due date), and throw in some reward points/miles to boot.

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P.S. - Can't help but find it amusing that (as of this writing) a big CapitalOne ad sits squarely on this page. It's almost as if they knew... hmm....

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Some of the ads are from Google. And yes 'they know.'

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Don't Panic. Big Brother, loooves you.

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What's in your eggshell?

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You don't want to know. It's rather old, so........

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Silly season is over. Credit card companies are equally to blame. Easy credit likely is one cause of prices creeping up over the years, as folks are proven to spend more and think less about prices when using credit cards. Companies know this and thus can get away with raising prices that they might not have gotten away with if folks sill used cash.

Buying on credit while a necessary evil, should only be used in emergencies or sparingly on big ticket items. Separating the payment from the purchase while a boon for retailers, gives shoppers the buyers high without the instant consequences of the payment. Also it increases the eventual payment "low" as the buyer has already used the item and it's lost it's luster to an extent. When you purchase with cash, there is the high of the purchase is offset with the "low" of the payment, and it's a pretty balanced transaction emotionally. When you have the higher highs and lower lows of buying with credit, it's an emotional rollercoaster of sorts and causes the depressed shopper wanting to buy their way out of their "payment due" low, by making their next purchase on credit.

It's quite the system the retailers have set-up.

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Can't disagree with most of what you write - except the part about plastic being useful only in emergencies and for big-ticket items. Particularly the latter, as it implies that those big-ticket items should be credit-financed in spite of the associated interest.

Rather than giving up on every-day C.C. usage altogether, I am thinking the better long-term solution might be to more directly attack the problem you describe: the emotional re-education of the consumer to avoid the immediate gratification/delayed consequences that credit cards might (though not necessarily) enable.

The plastic is just the plastic, and holds no inherent evil. It is the user of the plastic who makes it either a devastating weapon, or a useful tool.

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I only use a debit card, and I prefer it that way, but I rec'd this post simply for your use of Tim Curry.

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He's just a sweet transvestite, from Transsexual Transylvania.

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Don't dream it....be-e-e it!

I have to say, I am trying my damndest to find his version of Joni Mitchell's song from that album of his that I used to have....

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Cold Blue Steel and Sweet Fire?

(Down, down, down the dark ladder)

I liked his version too.

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Does that song mention the words "jelly roll"? If so, that's it. I will now google.

Or, as Johnny put it, I will use "teh google".

Donnie, I heart you.

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Dammit, I screwed up your link. I did, however, listen to Joni's version, which is sweet, but Tim's had an edge that I truly went crazy for, back in my teens when I heard it. iTunes does not offer it. Dammit, dammit, dammit.

Oh well.

Thank you very much, Donal, for trying.

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It was a live version, not too bad. I'll post it on my site and let you know.

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Lovely Sandburg....

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That was naked pandering on my part. :-)

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Okay, I did lie, up there. I do have one credit card with a catalog clothing company. About three times a year I splurge on clothes for work. I currently owe $500 in debt. I always pay about double the minimum payment per month, though, and I pay before the due date.

Hey, a chica's gots to have some clothes, ya know?

Oh, and did I mention they're tied to a home goods catalog and that I'm also paying off a rug and coffee table? A chica's got to have a place to put her feet up.

Other than that, I'm completely debt-free, other than my contract for my computer. Again, I pay on time and more than the minimum due.

Okay, carry on with the Tim Curry tunes...thanx.

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Oh, wait....I forgot to tell you, Donnie, that I love your new avatar. I sorta miss the guy in the toga, but the bicycle-riding bush is adorable too, in its own weird way.

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"Weird" being the operative word here?

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Yes. I love weird. Weird is its own wisdom, in a way, no? I mean, don't we all love to follow that one oddball marching to his or her own drumbeat?

Donnie marches quite well in either a toga, or whilst wearing a bush on a bicycle.

Lucky for me, the bush impedes his speed, and I'm able to march alongside him as he pedals along to his beat.

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Donal

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  • Website: www.donalfagan.com
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