... Alfred E. Newman would say, ... .wizarduniverse.com

The years pass. But time is different in one's mind than the tick tock of real time. I mean it seems like Ron Wood just joined the Stones sometimes. Half the Beatles are dead and gone but it does not seem that way as I watch an 'old' tape of the Fab Four doing a gig in a recording studio.

Yet the recording studio from a technological standpoint has changed in ways one never would have predicted. 

I get a kick out of our own David Seaton presenting his own late night show on his blog. Talk about power to the people!!!

Of course, we must remember that the first Beach Boy hit was a 'demo tape' performed in a suburban garage or some such that was really aired by accident when a DJ in California presented it on his radio show.

It is just that individuals will make use of technology on this world wide web without worrying about 'rules' or protocols. THEY JUST DO IT!!!

But my rant today is about Language. I have to really try to keep up and the only way to accomplish that is to read several different articles or essays from several different sources every day. But I keep my own biases just so that I can keep something unto myself. So that I do not lose 'me'.  Although that might not be the worst thing in the world, I sometimes think.

1.               Diss:  Did you know that there is a village called Diss in Norfolk, England? Wiki tells me that: Originated in Jamaican Vernacular English, perhaps originally short for disrespect or disparage. Does it really take that much more energy to simply note that a critic disparaged something written by Frank Rich? Or that some pundit has recently demonstrated disrespect for our new President?  It seems a stupid 'word'. Not stupid in Jamaica. Just stupid here.

2.               Transparency:  When I was growing up, transparency meant something pejorative. The Beatles wrote:  "I am looking through you. Where did you go. I thought I knew you what did I know. You don't look different but you have changed. I'm looking through you, your not the same." But, sometime in the last ten years, transparency has taken on a meaning that has something to do with the physical properties of Saran Wrap. Transparency is a good thing. When certain government leaders are working with a transparency, that is meant as a good omen. Things are being done 'in the open'.  However, every time I hear the word, I still harken back to the Fab Four.

3.               Tech:  There is 'high tech' and 'low tech'.  There is 'bio-tech' and 'tech support'.  There are 'techies' which I confuse with 'trekkies' from time to time.  It is supposedly short for technological. But it may also refer to technician or technology. I personally think it is used by some people pretending that they know things that they really do not know.  I know I have been guilty of this pretension myself from time to time.

4.               Rec:   This is a term which is short for recommend or recommendation. As in: "I have rec'd this blog."  Or I was rec'd several times for my post.  It does not work conversationally. I mean saying you rec'd a post sounds like you had some problems maneuvering in your car around some rural bend in the road.

5.               Googled:   I find myself relating that I 'googled' some name or concept. First of all, if the truth be told I might have 'yahooed' the particular item in order to discover further information on  some other web site.  I guess that 'yahooed' has so many pejorative connotations, that this is why we kind of stick to 'googled'. Although, read this silly paragraph out loud and tell me with a straight face that Googled is that much better than yahooed. From the beginning, all I think about when I hear this expression is Barney Google with the goo goo googley eyes.

6.               Spin:  I think that this term began somewhere with an old metaphor. She was 'spinning a web of deceit.'   I was always stuck on the metaphor that 'he seems to be spinning his wheels.'   Meaning that the individual is full of sound and fury but not getting anywhere. That is why, when I would first tuned into bill orally, I could not understand exactly what he meant when he referred to his show as a no-spin zone.  I thought that he was attempting to say that he was not full of sound and fury but immobile at the same time. Which brings me to another problem with language in a fast moving communications age. If someone tells you that they do not spin concepts or stories--which presumably means the narrator is claiming a level of honesty not found elsewhere--it usually means that that someone is in fact a lying sack of s....

7.               PC:  This always confuses me. I mean pc is a personal computer, is it not? I mean we called it that because prior to the entry of geniuses like Jobs and Gates, computers were something owned and used by the government or great big mfing corporate big wigs.  For the sole purpose of keeping the peasants down. But PC also means 'political correctness'.  And this is a concept I never understood. It has a pejorative context in that the user of this term is somehow sneering at those who call them out for using racial slurs or using terms that demean women or the handicapped....or whatever. So for me PC is a good thing whether you are discussing personal computers or political correctness. I always saw it as polite correctness anyway. To use PC in this context, you are simply looking out for some of your readers or listeners and what is so bad about that?

8.               Wiki'ed:  I say this all the time. Does the term not sound like to reference to light weight furniture made out of twigs? I probably Wiki'ed half the stuff in this blog. It is a wonderful tool though, is it not?  I mean it certainly is a tertiary source, but so is the Encyclopaedia Britannica.  Almost three million entries. And yet accessible. To more than a billion people. It just 'sounds' stupid. But I am guilty of that all the time. I mean sounding stupid.

9.               Progressive:  I am a liberal. If someone is a 'progressive' I probably will get along with him or her just fine. This pisses me off however because of the reason for the substitution. A liberal was someone who thought that all citizens are entitled to equal protection.  That states could not separate their inhabitants by race in a de jure manner. A liberal was someone who believes that children should have food regularly, that expectant mothers should have an opportunity to be examined by a doctor. Entire blogs, nay tomes, have been written about this subject. One of these days I will too.  BECAUSE IT PISSES ME OFF.

10.            Outsourced:   When the government outsources jobs why not use more appropriate terms?  I mean, when someone loses their job because of outsourcing that means that some corporate entity was awarded money for hiring people for less money with no benefits. Not because it would save taxpayers money.  But simply because some campaign contributor can make hundreds of millions of dollars by screwing his workers.  This term always confused me.  I kept thinking that it was applied during an essay contest.  The winner simply had found more information from different places and therefore had outsourced his competitors.

I would like to present my own candidates for new terms. I feel so old sometimes. Why not come up with my own euphemisms? 

Cheney'd:    If one is a new visitor to Rikers and finds himself as a multiple rape victim while awaiting trial on some drug charge, bereft of resources for posting bail, I think saying that this man was cheney'd would be more than appropriate.  Kind of like what the country went through over the last eight years.

Bushlike:   When a government worker takes seven or eight months off in vacation time every year and refuses to read briefings that run over three pages, we could just say that that worker is 'bushlike'.

Rummy'd:   When government workers lose their jobs because some activities have been 'outsourced', we should say that that worker was rummy'd.  Whatdoyathink?

Yoo'd:   When an attorney is asked to prepare a brief and  given the conclusion prior to any research, we could say that that attorney was being Yoo'd.  So that if you are asked to brief something about enhanced torture techniques, to research the current laws and come to some conclusions as to whether some enhanced technique is 'legal', you Yoo it.  You put a stick-em on the request that simply reads:  Your conclusion should read: It sure looks legal.

Gonzo'd:  When a Congressional Panel is faced with a government witness that refuses to answer any question in a straightforward manner, we could just say that that Congressional Panel has just been Gonzo'd.

Ashcroft'd:  Recall when Ashcroft was shocked by bare breasts on a statue of Justice. And he proceeded to cover up the offending 'objects' at a price of eight grand or so. All the while helping us become more patriotic by waiving our Constitutional Rights.  From now on when some official defaces a beautiful work of art while, at the same time, acting in a despicable manner, we could just say that the beautiful work of art has been ashcroft'd.

Coleman'd:  When you prevail upon rich bastards to keep a duly elected official out of government and in the courts system, you have successfully coleman'd the opposition.

These are just a few that I have come up with. Maybe you can come up with more. In the meantime, I shall end this post on a preposition, sort of.