Rarely does one find comedy in the Wall Street Journal. They saved all their punch lines for the end of the year.  In an article this morning entitled: "Gonzales Defends Role in Antiterrorist Policies",  EVAN PEREZ comes up with one punch line after another:

" Alberto Gonzales, who has kept a low profile since resigning as attorney general nearly 16 months ago, said he is writing a book to set the record straight about his controversial tenure as a senior official in the Bush administration."

You cannot make stuff like this up. The guy who could not remember what he had for breakfast while being grilled by Congress, is writing a book to set the record straight. I recall that almost two decades ago, there was a book entitled: The Wit & Wisdom of Dan Quail and it was basically a book cover and a bunch of blank pages. Later on WSJ records:

"Mr. Gonzales, 53 years old, doesn't have a publisher for his book. He said he is writing it if only 'for my sons, so at least they know the story.' The chapters on the Bush administration's surveillance program, which involved eavesdropping without court warrants, and other controversial aspects of his work, remain blank. That is in part because he remains under investigation regarding allegations of political meddling at the Justice Department."    

So basically, the book so far is blank and he cannot find anyone to publish it. I really do not know what I can ad to this.  I have five or six blank notebooks lying around and I do not have a publisher either. The article goes on to describe this mental giant as a Harvard graduate and one time Justice on the Texas Supreme Court. You are left with severe questions as to the standards at Harvard as far as admission policies and as to the standards for deciding state law in Texas.

Gonzo certainly has some boldness however as when he asks: "What is it that I did that is so fundamentally wrong, that deserves this kind of response to my service?"

This is definitely the wrong question because thousands of pages will be written in response to this query over the next decade.  A question that might take a great deal shorter time to answer might be: What the hell did Gonzo do that was fundamentally correct?

That might end up as a book with a cover and a lot of blank pages, also.

Another hilarious line from the former AG: "for some reason, I am portrayed as the one who is evil in formulating policies that people disagree with. I consider myself a casualty, one of the many casualties of the war on terror." Does not he even sound more stupid when he attempts to characterize himself as heroic?

Even when Gonzo thinks he is being candid, he has a humorous take on it although he has not a clue as to how stupid it makes him look:

"He says that while he bears responsibility as former Attorney General that 'doesn't absolve other individuals of responsibility.'  Now try and parse that statement. I think he is saying that he made some mistakes, but others fucked up too.  That is the only sense I can make out of this ridiculous remark.

Gonzo's present situation is funnier than his comments. He says that he is unable "... to land a job. He has delivered a few paid speeches, done some mediation work and plans to do some arbitration, but said law firms have been "skittish" about hiring him."

Skittish?  Would you buy a legal opinion from this butt head?  I told you, you cannot make this stuff up.  

The article goes on to discuss the famous meeting in the Hospital with Corney and Ashcroff.
If you recall Corney's side of it, Ashcroft appeared almost dead from surgery and drugs. Corney's testimony is somehow ignored by WSJ which is to be expected. But if you recall, Gonzo could not get Corney to sign off on some more illegal wiretaps, so Gonzo showed up in the hospital to get Ashcroft to sign off on it.  So what is Gonzo's take on the meeting?

"I found Ashcroft as lucid as I've seen him at meetings in the White House."

I really do not know what I can add to that statement. It stands on its own as one of the greatest depictions of w's cabinet over the last eight years.

But the best line of them all, was saved until last."In one of his final acts before leaving office, Mr. Gonzales denied he was planning to quit, even though he had told the president of his intention to resign. Asked about the misleading comment Tuesday, he said:

                                   "At that point, I didn't care."