You Too: How to Mantle Your Own Atomic Bomb
Everybody's gone nuking, nuking USA.
Yep, that's the savage trend our fine intelligence services and loyal Administrations are fighting against. Thanks to revelations by Daily Mail via Obsidian Wings/Hilzoy, we see the full extent of how close the perpetrators have gotten to our shores, creating a monstrous threat out of ordinary household materials that would put Iran and North Korea's efforts to shame. Here's but a brief glimpse of their modus operandi. For the squeamish, you may want to stop now - it ain't pretty. My guess is they plan on getting our children versed in these techniques via carefully relabled Madrassas, basically liberal-funded day care and alternative school programs a la William Ayers, this time promoted by the insidious and dastardly Barbara Ehrenreich posing as a "food editor":
"First transform the gas into a liquid by subjecting it to pressure. You can use a bicycle pump for this. Then make a simple home centrifuge. Fill a standard-size bucket one-quarter full of liquid uranium hexafluoride. Attach a six-foot rope to the bucket handle. Now swing the rope (and attached bucket) around your head as fast as possible. Keep this up for about 45 minutes. Slow down gradually, and very gently put the bucket on the floor. The U-235, which is lighter, will have risen to the top, where it can be skimmed off like cream. Repeat this step until you have the required 10 pounds of uranium. (Safety note: Don't put all your enriched uranium hexafluoride in one bucket. Use at least two or three buckets and keep them in separate corners of the room. This will prevent the premature build-up of a critical mass.)"
Rather shocking. Read the whole instructions page - it gets worse. Easier than most 3rd graders' homework assignments (presuming they can twirl a bucket for 45 minutes), this presents a threat to us all, in the most bi-partisan sense, which is why the Obama government has chose to continue its state secrets policy and privilege approach coherently pieced together by the previous DoJ, so it can countermand those who've read this brainwashing material in some of the only effective de-programming ways possible, such as slicing up their penises and pouring a hot stinging liquid into the wounds. Obviously the softies at the ACLU want to see this essential tool in the fight against terrorism dismantled, and go out of their way to equate it with methods like water boarding, which may or may not be torture anyway. And at the end of the day, this wasn't at Gitmo, it was in Morocco, so how could it be our fault?
Fortunately, our Democracy keeps on ticking and we find new and creative ways to counter the threats against America by the likes of Biryam Mohamed. At some point, foreign nationals shouldn't enjoy the compassion of our over-generous judicial system. Obama continues the tradition of tough love and the unpleasant covert tactics needed to keep our open system intact. When it comes to security, Americans know the importance of bi-partisanship, and will give the Administration the needed support to keep our intelligence services doing whatever it purportedly might be doing to defend our human rights home and abroad. While the courts try to legislate from the bench, our intelligence services are better prepared to legislate and execute from back rooms and basements, and for that we can sleep better at night. Remember, they're out there, somewhere. If not this one, one like him.
You'd seem 'em wearing their baggies
Huarachi sandals too
A bushy bushy blonde hairdo
Nukin' U.S.A.
They'll all be planning an escape route
They're gonna strike real soon
We'll be tapping the switchboards
We can't wait for June
We're on high alert for the summer (Inside outside USA)
We're on observance to stay (Inside outside USA)
Tell the public we're workin' (Inside outside USA)
Protectin' the U.S.A.
