That's a smart tactic.

Joe, go fuck yourself.

Dave

It's been a rocky week for me hahahaha.

I've been walking a fine line that might have ended with me in a bell tower clutching an oozie. (KIDDING)

But I am starting to feel better.

In June of 2006 I lost my partner, Nathan, to cancer. He was a dear, beautiful, special man and will always be the love of my life. We were together six years and they were truly the happiest years of my life.

My heart aches that I was never able to marry him. In the final weeks of his life when he was no longer able to come home and he was stuck at the hospital... I purchased two rings and as he rested uncomfortably in his hospital bed, Nathan and I exchanged our own vows. It was just him and me sharing our words of love to the sounds of all that medical machinery to which he was attached. Tears ran down both of our faces as we told each other how much we cherished our love. I remember it word for word...

"David, when I die people will talk about all of the things I have done in my life. But they will never understand that the thing I am most proud of is you and our relationship and our love."

He went on like that for a bit as I put my head down on his upper leg and sobbed. He stroked my hair and told me over and over it was going to be all right as tears streamed down his face. He knew he was lying to me. Nathan died less than three weeks later.

There was so much about that experienece that left me angry.

I am angry that Nathan and I never were married. I never got to kiss him in front of family and friends, in front of a justice of the peace, in front of God.....dressed in tuxes as we proclaimed our love. I am angry we never had a reception with rubbery chicken and a chocolate fountain (haha). I am angry we didn't get to dance to our song ("Someone Like You" from the musical JECKYL AND HYDE).

I am angry that every time Nathan went to a new hospital or got a new nursing staff, I had to defend my right to be there at his bedside. If Nathan's family hadn't defended me... there were multiple hospital staff members who would have forced me to leave as I was not Nathan's "immediate family".

I am angry that my Nathan is not here and a major reason is because he didn't have insurance and his healthcare was questionable, at best. He eventually found his way to Barnes Jewish Hospital where he received the best care for no cost... but we wasted months at terrible hospitals where he got wretched care that did more damage than good. Don't even get me started on the doctor who gave him the wrong chemotherapy and destroyed multiple paths of treatment.

I am angry that I have the best insurance in the world, and my Nathan could not be covered by it because we were not married in the eyes of the government. I worked so hard to have a good job with good insurance, and my "husband" could not benefit from it.

For all of these reasons I am angry.

In the last days before Nathan passed, he left me a phone message in the middle of the night. I still listen to that message when I miss so much I can't function. He told me he would always love me. Sadly, love wasn't enough. I know in my heart things would have been different if he had truly been my husband in the eyes of the government.

I lost Nathan on June 27th 2006. In his last gesture of love, Nathan waited in a coma for two days for me to leave the room. I went for a quick walk on the third day of his coma and he let out his last breath five minutes after I stepped out. Because of Nathan's love and generosity, I get to remember his living and not his dying. For that, I will always be grateful to my dear, sweet, precious Nathan.

Tuesday's vote will always feel like a repudiation of my love for Nathan and his love for me. That love was deep and real and intense and had no boundary. I would have died for him, and he would have done the same for me.

For all of those reasons, Nathan deserved to be my husband. And I deserved to be his.

The most touching scene at my polling place? A younger African American woman showing her elderly Grandmother how to fill in the circles on her ballot. My heart was full.

I couldn't help but think of Barack's grandmother who missed election day by just a handful of hours. I can't help but think Toots went to heaven a day early to make sure this was all a done deal.

God Bless Her. God Bless Barack Obama. God Bless Every One of Us. God Bless America

My partner and I will be thinking of you as we stand in Grant Park in Chicago tomorrow evening for the Barack Obama Celebration.

When it is finally called for Obama, tears will run down my face, and I hope to grab and hug as many Obama supporters as I possibly can.

This will be my first political gathering of this magnitude. I am so excited. I wish you could be there to whoop it up with me. Thank goodness I managed to swing a ticket!

Obama '08

And could the news stop shoving those outlier mason Dixon polls down our throats when ALL other polls show strong Obama leads?

Yikes!

And just so everyone knows....I managed to snag a ticket to the Obama celebration in Chicago's Grant Park. I will be thinking of all of you as I stand there with my Obama sign. I wish TENA could be right by my side!

:)

Do you think Obama still needs money in these final days? Tomorrow is payday and I had planned to donate my last $50.00 of the campaign. It would put me over $800.00 since I began donating in the primaries.

Does he need more money? Should I send it?

Thoughts?

No Class? No Dignity? No Honor? NO PROBLEM!

A Haiku...

Republican rule.
Ends not a moment too soon.
Carcass smells like poop.

Another Haiku...

McCain's fun campaign.
A joy for your eyes and ears.
They feast on themselves.

Another Another Haiku...

Palin goes out rogue.
Flops like flailing bird.
Alaska's deep shame.

Thank you.

I am a broke teacher who is barely able to pay the mortgage on my small 1940's house.

But I donated another $25.00 today (second time this week). Since the primary began, I have given around $750.00. That is so huge for me... but it will be worth it to have President Obama.

I am also traveling to Indiana to volunteer with other Obama supporters to canvass the area. It will be my first time to ever volunteer for a candidate.

Obama/Biden 2008 & 2012

Are you mother fucking kidding me?

So typical.

"Ohhhhh the big scary black man is took something that belongs to me!"

Wait...that sounds like John McCain's campaign slogan

My thougths are with you and your mom. Sometimes the greatest dignity a person can achieve is making the decision to "own" the end of their life.

I remember when my partner, Nathan was diagnosed with an aggressive form of Lymphoma in August of 2005. He only lived 10 months after his diagnosis. Six weeks before he died, I remember Nathan looked into my eyes and said "I am done with all this". And he was. He was resolute. No more chemo. No more radiation. No more fighting. He chose to go out on his own terms. Nathan was a beautiful man, and I miss him. But when he made the decision to stop treatment I saw a peace in him that I hadn't seen in him in months and months. It broke my heart, because a 28 year old man shouldn't die of cancer. But he owned it. It was his life and and it was his death.

Reading about you and your mom brought tears to my eyes today.

I'm a Democrat for a lot of reasons. But dignity in life and dignity in death is one of them. The hypocrisy of Republicans makes me so angry. They scream "personal freedoms! personal freedoms!" But then they want to legislate what we do with our bodies. It makes my head want to explode.

Anyway, God Bless you and your Mom.

"There is no chance that Bracak Obama will win this All-American state. There is no doubt I will be victorious in Montana on November 4th. Oopsie I poopied my pants."

Good God it was an awkward press conference!

I kinda want to be "with" this gang when the results come in.

I thought for a moment about what I will do when Obama is elected as the next President of the United States. This is what I came up with...

Weep.

Weep that after eight years of having the Republicans use gay people as a wedge issue, that we will have a President who believes I deserve to be an American, and deserve to live my life any way I choose.

Weep that after eight years of "no child left behind", we will have a leader who understands the challenges of being a public school teacher and understands that failing good schools over ridiculous standards ruins education.

Weep that after eight years of a leader who was born rich and never had to put in a day of hard work in his life, we will have a President again who watched his mother struggle to pay bills and help him make his dreams come true.

Weep that after eight years of "Texan-Big Hat Shoot Em Up" diplomacy we will have a President who understands our place in the world order and will heal bad feelings and reinstate the USA as more than just a superpower, but as the central force in world-wide diplomacy.

Weep that we will be able to bring our soldiers home from Iraq and end an unjust war that was started with no truthful justification.

Weep that Martin Luther King's dream for our country will be finally realized. President Barack Obama means anything is possible.

Weep that we will once again be inspired by the potential of our nation and by what we CAN do...instead of focusing on what we have done in the past.

Weep that alternative fuel will become a priority in our nation... helping to heal our economy, helping to heal our environment, and helping to descrease our dependence on the Middle East.

Weep that, once and for all, divisive political action is proven to be a losing strategy and positive campaigns run by level headed candidates who focus on issues can prevail.

I will weep on the night of November 4th... and they'll be the best tears I have ever shed.

Obama/Biden '08/'12

Apparently it's $150,000 worth of foreign designed clothes from Neiman Marcus.

Wow, I guess that joke isn't as good with the real punch line. :(

Apparently it's $150,000 worth of foreign designed clothes from Neiman Marcus.

Wow, I guess that joke isn't as good with the real punch line. :(

It's a tough call!

Todd Palin, however.... with that goatee and dapper sense of northwestern style gives me pause. He's just a bit too GROOMED to be a straight Alaskan.

Perhaps that's why Sarah has all that wonderful "tolerance".

Brokeback Igloo, anyone?

I own a short sleeved white Obama tshirt that I wore to the Taste of Chicago.

I own a short sleeved black Obama tshirt that I wore to Market Days.

I own a black zip up Obama sweatshirt that I wear over almost everything I put on for work.

BUT most importantly, I have a brand new long sleeved black Obama/Biden tshirt waiting for ELECTION DAY.

I love my Obama

However, there is NO way theey can admit they are scrapping Iowa, Colorado, and New Mexico.

I think they know this thing is over, but they have to give the appearance they are competing in order to not destroy their down-ticketraces. What republicans would come out and vote if they knew that McCain's electoral college plan was to give up on Michigan, Minnesota, Iowa, New Mexico, and Colorado with the hopes to swipe Pennsylvania (where Obama is polling 10 to 12 points ahead at this point)? I can just see Republicans on election day....

"McCain doesn't even think he's in this thing. Why should I even bother voting?"

It's ALLLLLLLL talk and no action from McCain and the RNC. They have thrown NM, IA, and CO under the bus in desperation. Ignore the man talking behind the curtain....because reality is reality.

And coincidentally, this is probably the first ballot I will ever cast that I was 100% confident and proud of the person I am choosing. There is no "lesser of two evils" in my 2008 ballot. I will proudly declare my vote for Barack Obama for decades to come.

Obama/Biden '08
Obama/Biden '12
Sebelius/Kaine '16