I Have Changed
Nothing is the same. That's for damn sure. Of course, we all know that. The country is never going to be the same again. And we've all, all of us, said this to ourselves, our friends, our neighbors, our families. But what is not discussed so much, really, is how we as individuals have been changed, shaped, molded and formed as a result of this historic election. For my part, there are many things.
I look at life differently. It's no longer such a stark contrast. There are no longer such clearly defined lines of good and evil, black and white... Over the course of this election, my ideology has been shaped into something that is more of a pragmatic liberalism, than an ideological one.
This, of course, has been so greatly as a result of my involvement here at TPM. Of the openness of opinions here. But also in the decisions that Obama made over the course of the election, and my evaluation and reevaluation of such things. And then, of course, my last month in rural Missouri, speaking with and hearing from the numerous people who often had opinions and ideas very different from my own.
I now feel I have a personal interest and investment in this country, in its future, and in its shaping. Yes, Obama is the President, and yes, he will be shaping things for years to come. But as he always said, the election was not about him. It was about us. It was about me and you. And my personal and direct involvement in his movement has given me, I feel, a responsibility to do more than I had been doing previously. I feel that I owe it to our country, to which I feel so proud, to give back, and to contribute. I can't just sit on my ass anymore. I can't feel satisfied just talking about things. I have a personal stake in everything that happens from here on out. I can't ever forget that.
I spent my last month of the election in the most unlikely of places. Rural, southwest Missouri. A town called Joplin. Red as red can be, believe me. And yet, in a place where I had people openly tell me they would not vote for a black man, I found some of the best and most wonderful friends that a person can find. All as a result of my involvement in the campaign. I met the most amazing girl, too. Just showed up on her doorstep (literally) one day when I was out canvassing, got her to volunteer, and... Well, the rest is history, as they say?
My educational path has also changed. I love the theater, and was majoring in it. But now, I truly want to continue to be involved in politics. Involved in movements like Obama's. I think Constitutional Law is the thing I was to pursue. No, it's not because Obama taught it. I've always had a fire in me for Constitutional Law. But in revent years, that fire had dwindled. If anything, Obama has reignited it.
Yet these are just some of the small ways that I have changed. Some of the small things that I know will never be the same about me. I know I'm not the only one. We've all changed. In big and small ways. And by us, I mean not just the United States. I mean the entire world.
On election night, after the initial party and excitement was over and after the tears had been shed (and many of them from yours truly, for sure), I received a text from a friend. As some of you may know, I spent a period of time in France, in 2007, during their Presidential Election. I met many people there and made friends, one of whom was quite interested in American politics. He texted me, and thanked me, and the United States, for electing Barack Obama.
It's amazing that stories like these are no longer a rarity for me. I have so many in my mind. It is, in a word, inspiring. The pride I feel in my country, and in myself, have never been so great. When Obama said he wanted to bring "change", I had an idea of what he meant, especially politically. Yet I never knew that he would bring such direct change to this average individual. Thank you, Barack. Thank you.
I look at life differently. It's no longer such a stark contrast. There are no longer such clearly defined lines of good and evil, black and white... Over the course of this election, my ideology has been shaped into something that is more of a pragmatic liberalism, than an ideological one.
This, of course, has been so greatly as a result of my involvement here at TPM. Of the openness of opinions here. But also in the decisions that Obama made over the course of the election, and my evaluation and reevaluation of such things. And then, of course, my last month in rural Missouri, speaking with and hearing from the numerous people who often had opinions and ideas very different from my own.
I now feel I have a personal interest and investment in this country, in its future, and in its shaping. Yes, Obama is the President, and yes, he will be shaping things for years to come. But as he always said, the election was not about him. It was about us. It was about me and you. And my personal and direct involvement in his movement has given me, I feel, a responsibility to do more than I had been doing previously. I feel that I owe it to our country, to which I feel so proud, to give back, and to contribute. I can't just sit on my ass anymore. I can't feel satisfied just talking about things. I have a personal stake in everything that happens from here on out. I can't ever forget that.
I spent my last month of the election in the most unlikely of places. Rural, southwest Missouri. A town called Joplin. Red as red can be, believe me. And yet, in a place where I had people openly tell me they would not vote for a black man, I found some of the best and most wonderful friends that a person can find. All as a result of my involvement in the campaign. I met the most amazing girl, too. Just showed up on her doorstep (literally) one day when I was out canvassing, got her to volunteer, and... Well, the rest is history, as they say?
My educational path has also changed. I love the theater, and was majoring in it. But now, I truly want to continue to be involved in politics. Involved in movements like Obama's. I think Constitutional Law is the thing I was to pursue. No, it's not because Obama taught it. I've always had a fire in me for Constitutional Law. But in revent years, that fire had dwindled. If anything, Obama has reignited it.
Yet these are just some of the small ways that I have changed. Some of the small things that I know will never be the same about me. I know I'm not the only one. We've all changed. In big and small ways. And by us, I mean not just the United States. I mean the entire world.
On election night, after the initial party and excitement was over and after the tears had been shed (and many of them from yours truly, for sure), I received a text from a friend. As some of you may know, I spent a period of time in France, in 2007, during their Presidential Election. I met many people there and made friends, one of whom was quite interested in American politics. He texted me, and thanked me, and the United States, for electing Barack Obama.
It's amazing that stories like these are no longer a rarity for me. I have so many in my mind. It is, in a word, inspiring. The pride I feel in my country, and in myself, have never been so great. When Obama said he wanted to bring "change", I had an idea of what he meant, especially politically. Yet I never knew that he would bring such direct change to this average individual. Thank you, Barack. Thank you.
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Welcome back, Nathan. You've been missed.
Constitutional law? Why not Georgetown? Or GW? Or American? So that you can finish school AND go for an internship at the White House. Please send in your apps; send your resume to the transition team. Ask Jill Biden for a rec? If not, take your pick here of people who will write one.
Thank you for all that you did during the campaign. Thank you for telling us about it. Thank you for the hope you bring us about tomorrow. Cheers.
November 10, 2008 3:06 PM | Reply | Permalink
ww:
Off-topic, but under this screwy system (getting better mind you), I'm not sure if you got to see that I replied to you on that post about labor union yesterday. I can't find it or I would link to it.
Now back to our regularly-scheduled programming.
November 10, 2008 4:15 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks, Bslev, I will look for it.
November 10, 2008 5:16 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nathan,
If you go to to Law School to pursue ConLaw, then you may get discouraged by the atmosphere. May I recommend Political Science as a route where you can learn (and write about!) the law and its impacts on our society as much as you like and not be forced to sit through some very existentially dreary subjects like Administrative Law or Civil Procedure surrounded by equally demoralized sufferers.
Other than that, follow your enthusiasm.
November 10, 2008 3:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
I watched the conduct of Michelle and Barack. The effect on my own conduct goes deep. Now when I face a difficult situation or potentially nasty one, I ask myself, how would they act? I admire them both so much. I teach college history and I always ask my students, who is your hero? Never before now has it ever been a politician.
November 10, 2008 3:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nathan,
Congratulations and thank you for sharing your journey with us. A couple of words of advice and you can take them for what they are worth. First, don't be afraid to change and then change again and again. Second, don't rush to law school until you are really sure that's where you want to go. You can study the constitution even without law school. I know all too many people who I went to law school with, and many more who I have since practiced with in my more than 20 years as a lawyer, who rushed into law school and regretted it.
Seems to me that a guy like you has all kinds of opportunities. And, fwiw, there's nothing wrong with a little theatrical training, particularly if you want to end up in DC! Nice work Nathan; I'm sure your family must be very proud of you. Seems like many of us around here sure are.
Bruce
P.S. By the way, this passage from your piece is like reading my mind and I just need to repeat it for good measure:
"I look at life differently. It's no longer such a stark contrast. There are no longer such clearly defined lines of good and evil, black and white... Over the course of this election, my ideology has been shaped into something that is more of a pragmatic liberalism, than an ideological one".
I could not have said it better myself.
November 10, 2008 4:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nathan,
I'm very moved by this entry. And what Bruce said about law school. If you want to do it, do it, but think hard, very hard, first.
Here's the thing about law school. In a famous scened in "The Paper Chase," Prof. Kingsfield tells the class that they have come to school "with a mind of mush" and that its the job of the law school is not to teach you the law, but to reshape that mush so that you think like a lawyer. This is absolutely, true--as close to literally true as a statement containing a metaphor can be. There is a fundemental reshaping of the way you approach problems--all problems--that, at a certain point during your first year, becomes irreversible. It's not a coincidence that almost all voluntary law school dropouts occur after the end of the first semester. After that, they tend to be temporary, due to illness or pregnancy, or due to psychological problems. It's like there's a point at which you're brain has been messed with to the point that you're not really fit to do anything else.
Some people are very happy as lawyers. However, the ratio of miserable to content is, in my experience, about 8:1.
On the other hand, I have to admit that, based on my poli sci and history background, I thought I really understood both Abraham Lincoln and the U.S. Constitution before I went to law school. I was wrong on both counts.
November 10, 2008 4:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thank you everyone so much for your positive feedback and advice.
I certainly don't know if I want to be a lawyer. I do, though, know that I love the Constitution. Let me put it this way: many people I met and talked to in Missouri brought up the false claim that Barack doesn't put his hand over his heart for the Pledge of Allegiance. I eventually got to the point where I thought, "Why are we even pledging allegiance to the flag? We should be pledging allegiance to the Constitution, if anything at all." Now, don't get me wrong. The Pledge of Allegiance itself says, "...and to the Republic for which it stands..." Yet that is not the same to me. The Republic is founded upon the Constitution.
I hope that makes sense. What I mean is that I want to study our Constitution. And I want to understand it. I want to understand the intricacies of the law as it is directly prescribed to the Constitution.
Political Science? Certainly would be fun. But I couldn't do that without also studying History. Theory without real-world examples, backing and understanding is useless. That's why I've been put off by studying simply Poli. Sci.
We shall see, certainly, where I go from here. My main concern is a) finding enough money to keep myself afloat for the next couple months, and b) finding a way to get back into school for next Semester. I'm working on both, and both are difficult. But as with everything else in my past, it will work out.
November 10, 2008 5:16 PM | Reply | Permalink
You're doing great, kid!
November 10, 2008 5:27 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nathan: Congratulations and thanks on so many levels! You are an inspiration. There are many roads that will take you where you want to go. My background is in genetics, and who would have thought I could use that working for Congress for many years, and then two Administrations? As an old baby boomer, I feel like I finally found my voice in Obama. He touched people at all levels with his modern version of "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country." Those words were my initial inspiration. If you come to DC as a lawyer, be prepared for the onslaught of bad lawyer jokes. But do come to DC somehow. Wendy above is right that Georgetown, GW, and American are great places to study constitutional or administrative law. As for how you have changed, I feel it too. I am more inclined these days to be kinder to people, to move a little slower, to look people in the eye, to appreciate my world. Better angels indeed. Good luck with your choices, whatever they are. I hope your road takes many interesting turns.
November 10, 2008 5:29 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hmmmmm.......Chief Justice Donarum....has a nice ring to it!
November 10, 2008 6:51 PM | Reply | Permalink
Haha! Hmm... Maybe one day. ;)
November 10, 2008 7:43 PM | Reply | Permalink
I'm starting a joint MBA/JD program at Duquesne University next fall. When you make SCOTUS, can I clerk for you? :)
It's people like you that this election was aimed at. For American politics (and the Democratic Party in particular) to thrive, the best and brightest of our twenty-somethings have to have the fire lit under them early. You represent that idea and that ideal.
Political science is like guarding the president: days of boredom (classes, reading assignments) punctuated by moments of sheer terror (the paper that's half your grade). You might consider minoring in theater (or even doubling up) if you find yourself with extra time.
Thanks for your work this election season. Now send the Obama campaign an invoice for new shoes. :)
November 11, 2008 9:35 AM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks for the post.
Your text from your European friend reminds me of the internet happening from the previous GE when there was the outpouring of US citizens posting images of themselves apologizing
http://www.sorryeverybody.com/gallery/1/
The expressions on the faces of these people are polar opposites of those we saw on Tuesday night and since then.
Then the world responded with the apology accepted.
http://www.apologiesaccepted.com/gallery_00065.html
And I want to just want to posit that the theater and the arts in general are just as critical to our success as a humane and peaceful nation.
November 10, 2008 9:32 PM | Reply | Permalink
And I want to just want to posit that the theater and the arts in general are just as critical to our success as a humane and peaceful nation.
Yes, and I won't ever stop loving and being a part of the theater. I just don't want to use my education studying theater. I'd rather study something like politics, history, the constitution, etc.
November 10, 2008 10:19 PM | Reply | Permalink
Law school, Nathan, isn't any fun but if you want to learn to think, it's a great place for that. I know the first day I walked in I almost right back out. I had been hanging out with artists and all those 2d years with part time jobs wearing lawyer suits and lawyer shoes freaked me out for awhile.
But by the 2d year I settled down and took what they were offering, which was to reshape the way I see and though about things and I'm glad I went because it was the first time I was challenged.
It's a good place for that - being a lawyer is ok. I liked law school better.
You can do whatever you want, Nathan - you're smart and motivated and you'll make it successful, whatever it is.
November 11, 2008 9:29 AM | Reply | Permalink
You seem like a nice guy, why the heck would you want to go to law school? I say this with tongue in cheek, of course, as a Law School graduate.
As Tena correctly points out, Law School, while a huge pain in the ass, is great for learning to think and argue. As NC Steve points out, it changes your wiring foreever, making you think critically and ruthlessly, "like lawyer". This is a tremendous asset in professional life and can lead to great success.
But, with great knowledge, comes great responsibility! Your newfound powers will tend to annoy the hell out of almost every non-lawyer you know, particularly your closest family members. To confront this, it is usually necessary to develop separate styles of "inter-lawyer" and "non-lawyer" communications, to keep from being a total boor and a seeming know-it-all when not around other lawyers.
I also have to say, actually being a lawyer is a hit or miss proposition...Most of the lawyers I know (me included) don't much like their jobs, and the ones I know that do truly love their work? They will be paying off their loans for the next 300 years.
Just think long and hard about it, because you spend 3 years there, and much of it isn't Con Law.
If you can keep your open mind, your ability to listen, your kindness and your generosity after three years of law school, then it was worth it. Unfortunately it seems law school often beats these qualities out of people, or attracts those without those qualities to begin with.
Sorry for being a bummer! Loved your post though.
November 11, 2008 10:20 AM | Reply | Permalink
basically you seem like exactly the type of person Law Schools need more of.
Good luck. You'll be fine whatever you decide. That much is obvious.
November 11, 2008 10:22 AM | Reply | Permalink