By now you've probably heard the big news - destor23's preferential candidate microchip
has finally been activated by the Obama campaign. Where and when the
Obama campaign was able to surgically implant the chip into destor23's
brain is still a mystery, but sadly his story is not unique. The
lifeless, unthinking, hopeful automatons are growing in numbers. Like
heat-seeking missiles, they travel in packs to Costco, purchase bulk
cases of Kool-Aid and then transport them to local Obama campaign field
offices. Following instructions beamed to them through their chips,
they are ordered to purchase Obama's books and donate weekly to his
campaign. Before long destor23 will personally be fighting poverty by
trying to keep his own finances above the national line. Like a shell
of a human, his lifeless eyes will blink slowly and from his mouth will
come empty platitudes, and he will speak of "community involvement" and
"a new dialogue" and "a fresh direction."
It's interesting, because his activation comes just as my chip is
getting weaker and more infrequent signals. Why, just last week I went
an entire day with baaahing like a sheep, as RaeK so often accurately
depicts. Long an Obama supporter, reader of his first book, and close
follower of his campaign, I'm simply waiting patiently for Obama to
kick it into the next gear. And, even more surprisingly, I'm starting
to admire the ruthlessness of Clinton.
Now, before the goon squad comes in here and compliments me for seeing
the light, and calling Obama and his supporters all sorts of names, let
it be known that I still support Obama, I do not think Clinton has a
chance in Hell of winning the nomination or the general, and that at
the end of the day, I largely despise Clinton's tactics and the
meanness and cynicism that she brings out in people. In addition, I
recoil at the thought of 4 years of a Clinton White House, the constant
soap opera drama that she and Bill seem unable to live without, the
gridlock between a slight majority Dem House and Senate and the rabid
defiance of Clinton-hating Republicans. No, that is not a pretty
picture. That is not what I want. But I do want the young Jedi to
learn from this fight.
First of all, Clinton is out-hustling him. She does more campaign
events, more one-on-one meet and greets, and in general looks like she
works harder than he does. Of course it helps their campaign that they
have two strong advocates and that Bill Clinton is out-hustling the
both of them, but Obama would do well to learn from these two. Even if
he is working as hard as them, it doesn't come across. Let us see you
sweat a little, Barack. Loosen your tie at the end of a long day and
look a little exhausted. It'll seem like you've been going 150 all
day, and that's a good thing. We want to see you put in the elbow
grease for this nomination.
Second of all, Clinton doesn't give a shit about looking mean. She's
in it to win it. You can say that hurts the party (personally I don't
think it does), but I do want someone who's going to kick and
thrash about a bit before giving up. Shows me that they really want
the job. Now, Obama's personality is not well-suited to this kind of
behavior, and he's exhibited a calm, even, cool demeanor throughout
this process. But at some point, I'd love to see him get his blood
up. Not in a "SHAME ON YOU, BARACK OBAMA!!" kind of a way, but perhaps
he could show a little, teensy bit of anger at McCain's idea of
continued war in Iraq. Or a little anger at the fact that this economy
has been destroyed by this administration. And because of his demeanor
so far in the campaign, all it would take is one press conference with
a clenched jaw and an icy stare. I want to see the eye of the tiger,
Barack. The "I'm coming after you, muthafucka" stare that will show us
that you're going to fight your way to the White House, not hope your
way there.
Lastly, the Clintons are just better at playing the press. Earlier in
the campaign, they strong-armed them into going after Obama. They
showed their effectiveness again by demoting Penn without actually
firing him. Releasing their taxes on a Friday at 4PM. And besides the
Bosnia mishap, she's gotten away with a series of exaggerations and
misstatements. Most importantly, we see now that they and their
surrogates are aggressively pushing to frame the last part of this race
as a matter of civil rights - the counting of the popular vote in FL
and MI. Obama could certainly learn from this endless assault of press
that spews forth from the Clinton camp.
Ultimately, the Clintons are ruthless, strategic, selfish, and they
really, really, really want to get back to the White House. Those may
not be admirable qualities, but they certainly don't hurt an aspiring
Presidential candidate. Obama's chip is still firmly implanted in my
brain, but the signal is getting fuzzier. He needs to increase the
volume a little bit if he wants the instructions to keep getting
through. I often thought he would turn up the heat in the general
election, but maybe now is the time.