I should be sleeping.  Yet things are on my mind, and tossing while turning doesn't help.  If he was awake I'd be talking to the man who loves me.  If he was here - or there, but awake.  Much of what's bothering me revolves around his absence; but that's none of your business and not the point of this particular rant.  Or non-rant since I don't do them well.  Consider it a thought in the middle of the night.  Just a moment in time ... okay!  Relax, will ya?  I'm getting to it.  Patience, people!

I'm just so tired of the shit.  I'm just so tired of the shit.  For emphasis:  I'm just so tired of the shit.

And just for good measure, I'd like to see all the Republicans who aren't willing to come up with an idea of their own to just go fuck themselves.  Right now.  Do not pass "Go", do not collect $200.00.  You had over eight years to do something, anything.  You suck.

People who are on Medicare and crying foul: get a grip, will you?  It's a government run, "socialist" program.  Want to give it up?  Crickets.  Goddamn crickets.  My 78-year-old mother would like to tear what's left of your hair out.  Stand still, bastards.

Can't even bother to consider single-payer because it's too expensive??  Screw you and the horse you rode in on.  Think about the money that could be saved, the hours that are now spent pouring over private insurance paperwork.  Ask a doctor with a private practice.  Ask a hospital.  Ask any freaking body with a clue - the easiest paperwork with the most immediate results is Medicare Insurance.

Let's not forget the "death panel".  During Medicare reform in 2003, many of the same who declare that end-of-life decisions now mean that Granny will be slipped some pills were all for a "living will".  Fuck them.  They were all about money - even then.  The only reason they thought it was a fantastic idea was because it would save Medicare (government) money.  If they've decided that they don't want prolonged care ... yeah!!  Now?  Death Panel = Obama will kill anyone over 65.  Please tell me that means I can kill those Republicans if I'm on the panel.  I have a list.  They're not all old, and they're not all dying.  Yet.

I need sleep, and need to be at work at eight in the morning.  I'm also uninsured.  My small business employer offers no healthcare - but better wages than most.  Enough to pay for my own?  No.  I don't blame my employer.  I just don't understand why the fuck I pay taxes and still can't be covered by the very plan that every provider prefers, and everyone close to 65 waits to receive.

Forgive me.  I'm sorry for being politically incorrect.  Did I mention fuck that, too?

I'm just so tired of the shit.

We can not win when going in and out again.

We do not succeed when the flower fights the weed.

We will not exalt when the victor is at fault.

We are the future.

You can not be The One; a daughter or a son. 

You do not eat the sour with it's bitter taste of power.

You will not kill the beast while they enjoy the feast.

You are the future.

I can not begin to know the hatred some dare show.

I do not cater to those who must wait until later. 

I will not hesitate to borrow the hopes of our tomorrow.

I am the future.

My name is Michelle.  You may have heard of me, but likely only because of my husband.  While I am a strong and independent woman, a good mother and a loving wife - I don't mind taking a step back tonight.  Letting him be the subject.  Because I love him.

He is the man of my dreams, the man I fell in love with so many years ago.  Before he was worth the world's admiration ... before he felt the wrath of his job.  When his hair was still black and his thoughts were multi-colored.  When ideallistic dreams filled his silly young head and the future of this country consumed him.  When his laughter filled a room and his smile lit my heart.  Forgive me for going on, it's just because I love him.

These days, the man I knew before is still there.  He is trying so hard to do everything he can for these United States he now leads.  He stumbles, he falls and he makes huge mistakes - all enough to make him wonder sometimes if he's really good enough.  If anyone is.  I try to assure him, to tell him that he is a good man and that's what this country needs.  And not just because I love him.  Because it's my country too, and I need him.

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