Not Recommended
I had a minor "incident" while doing doorhangers today in suburban northern Virginia.
A mid-40s male was doing yardwork out front as I approached the driveway in the early evening darkness. The mid-40s female listed as also living at the address--previously identified as at least a "gettable" voter--was the person to whom the doorhanger was addressed. She was nowhere in sight.
Upon his recognizing the Obama/Biden sticker on my chest we had the following exchange:
Him, very non-jocularly, tight-lipped, no trace of a smile: So are you going to reimburse me for the $20,000 tax increase I'm going to have?
Me: (not thinking clearly): Not gonna happen.
Him (seeing the doorhanger I was walking up his driveway to deliver, again very non-jocularly): Don't deliver trash on my property.
Me (opting to forego trying to deliver the doorhanger): Do you speak for your wife, sir?
Suffice it to say we were not enamored of one another as we parted ways.
I hadn't known either the guy or his (presumably) SO. They live half a mile away from us. We didn't get far enough for me to inform him that I am a neighbor.
He was dressed casually as one would expect someone doing yardwork would be. With my unthinking reply to his tax comment I was being presumptuous, for indeed he might have earned enough money to have a $20K tax hike looking at him if Obama does win and succeeds in getting through Congress the tax policy he's been saying he'll push.
I would have done far better had I responded to his question simply: "No." (someone feeling as strongly as he appeared to is not someone it was going to be productive for me to try to engage in a discussion.)
When I got back to our precinct captain's home to drop off the sheets recording the houses I'd done, I let the coordinator know that it was an uneventful shift, except for this one incident. I explained what had happened, verbally reinforcing the notation I'd made on my sheet for the next person this time around not to engage the male of the house. I also vented that I hate it when men speak for their SO female partners.
There were three middle-aged and over women taking this in. One of them, her face lit up, said "We need more men who think like you!" One of the other women, also smiling, said, "Yeah, well, it's getting tense." (Obama leads narrowly as Dems seek to win Virginia in the presidential race for the first time since 1964.) Indeed I did feel royally cheesed off at the guy for denying me permission to deliver the doorhanger intended for his SO. But my hasty, careless reply on the tax comment may have (inadvertently--I was just stupid and careless, not intentionally mean-spirited) insulted or irritated him.
I am wondering for those denizens still reading this who went door-to-door for Kerry and/or Gore as well: how does your experience this time compare with the earlier ones in terms of the level of civility of exchanges with members of the public with whom you've interacted FTF or on the phone?
I would have done far better had I responded to his question simply: "No." (someone feeling as strongly as he appeared to is not someone it was going to be productive for me to try to engage in a discussion.)
Agree, from your description. Seems to me the type of person that will never vote to give Democrats power. You wouldn't get anywhere arguing that Obama is a centrist on economics, which would be the truth. He might even know that about Obama. He sounds like the type that doesn't want a Democratic president in power expediting a Democratic Congress' bills, doesn't care how centrist, just doesn't want a Democrat, because he thinks it means higher taxes on higher income groups and more federal programs.
I think the only way to possibly get anywhere with someone like that is to point to the poor stewardship record of fiscal policy of Republican administrations (and I mean keeping it narrowed to the Treasury Sec. and Fed Reserve Bank), and even better, to point out that he will probably end up paying the same amount in taxes, only in state and local, to make up for what Feds don't take. It's actually usually the case unless you live in Mississippi or Alaska or something. The services have to be paid for, they just get paid for by the state or local. If he's an educated person who is aware of globalization, he'll know that the oldie about sending money to Washington wasting in handling and transit is just a canard. If he thinks along the lines of "state's rights" as to providing basic governmental services, he's truly a lost cause.
November 2, 2008 7:55 PM | Reply | Permalink
Oh, my quick gut read (which could of course have been wrong) based on the pugnacious greeting was that he was definitely non-gettable. I found myself feeling it was cowardly, fearful, domineering, or maybe some combination for him to invoke his (legit, I assumed--but who knows, his female SO might have been sole owner of the property for all I knew) property rights to muscle me out of delivering something intended solely for his wife.
When he happens to pick up the mail before his SO and comes across something he doesn't want her to see, I wonder if he tosses it? None of my business, to be sure. And I just wrote a comment in another thread the other day offering my observation that couples have their own unique understandings and ways of doing things which are often inscrutable to others and which are therefore hazardous to judge for those so inclined or tempted.
My wife and I have a real clear understanding that we do not intercept, filter, etc. mail (same for phone calls or any other communications, for that matter) addressed to the other--even if we might feel sure they'll consider it junk mail and toss it. I'm sure that lots of other couples give one another leave to toss stuff that looks like junk without giving it a second thought.
I've done quite a bit of campaign work over the years. The experiences are unfailingly interesting. And sometimes memorable!
November 2, 2008 10:29 PM | Reply | Permalink
Relax. Judging by the sarcastic tone of his question, he was gunning for a fight before you said a word.
He is a low information knucklehead not worth the time that you are expending on him.
November 2, 2008 7:56 PM | Reply | Permalink
American Dreamer:
You played it just right. You never could have convinced that man of anything. My bet is that his wife is used to him, she'll listen to what he'll have to say, or she'll pretend to do so, and on Tuesday, if she has not done so already, she'll proudly cast her ballot for Senator Obama. :)
Nice work.
Bruce
November 2, 2008 8:55 PM | Reply | Permalink
Your comment makes me smile, Bslev.
I can imagine the woman in question doing just that. And for the rest of the day and into the evening, particularly if they have family or friends over to watch the returns, she'll be especially considerate of everyone, refilling drinks, being "the perfect wife." Someone may comment that she seems to be in a good mood. And she'll say something like: "Oh, I just love it when we all get together, no matter what is happening..." And her husband will probably make an unkind remark about her lack of understanding about what's really happening. And she will be try to look concerned or unhappy, but internally she will be unphased, smiling to herself, feeling that pride we all feel when we have voted.
What symbolizes both independence and adulthood more than that? Do you remember how you felt the first time you voted? What it meant to you, standing there in that booth, being treated as a grown-up whose opinion counted? I remember it, as I remember the particulars of each time I've voted.
Maybe that is why I have been so obsessed about voter fraud issues. It's not just that it can subvert an election result, although obviously that is the more important issue. It's that it robs people of that certain joy that they have done their part to make the future better.
November 3, 2008 12:36 AM | Reply | Permalink