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BIKERS MAY LOVE McCAIN BUT VETERANS DO NOT
Guys, I wrote about this same topic back in May, but over at HuffingtonPost.com, I've been so annoyed at a trend I've seen of a blogger-who-shall-not-be-named, who keeps getting caught up in veteran's groups' enthusiasm when McCain speaks to them, and then assumes that they all support and will vote for him.
So I decided to speak out and explain that just because a veteran admires and respects John McCain's SERVICE; that does not mean he or she also respects and admires the man's RECORD, and that support for Obama is much stronger in the military sector than most civilians grasp.
Here is the link to my HuffPo:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/deanie-mills/bikers-may-love-mccain-bu_b_117225.html
if you'd like to get into the mix over there.
And here's the post, if you'd rather stay put:
If you follow the general storyline put forth by a mainstream media star-struck by a war hero, or simply observe the reception John McCain often receives at rallies held at veteran's organizations, it's very easy to accept and believe that all veterans everywhere practically worship John McCain. I've noticed this especially true of people who do not have a military background -- they often confuse enthusiastic support for McCain's SERVICE as support for his RECORD.
Troops cheer the man, the story goes, therefore they must want to vote for him. Veterans get teary-eyed and salute the flag when he appears, therefore they must be McCain supporters.
McCain's a war hero; he's got the military vote sewn up. Obama didn't serve, so he can kiss the military good-bye.
I have read this assumption in op-ed after op-ed, in blogpost after blogpost, even in commentary posted on blogs. It was especially glaring after Gen. Wesley Clark tangled with Bob Shieffer on CBS's, "Face the Nation," and Shieffer expressed dismay that, because Clark was critical of McCain's position on such things as the new G.I. Bill, that he was "denigrating McCain's service."
My husband, brother, father, brother-in-law are all Vietnam vets, and another brother-in-law recently retired at the rank of brigadier general of the U.S. Army special forces. (My dad retired from the Marine Corps at the rank of Master Gunnery Sgt.) My step-dad was retired Air Force and my sister did a hitch in the Air Force.
My son did two Marine Corps combat deployments to Iraq, (including the grueling Battle of Fallujah in Nov. of '04); my nephew did three combat deployments to Iraq with the Marines, and another nephew recently returned from a 15-month Iraq combat tour with an army Stryker Brigade -- part of Bush's troop escalation last year. Yet another nephew has done one deployment to Afghanistan with army special forces and is currently deployed in another part of the world.
For the first three years of the war, we had five Mills family members on active duty, and until my nephew's return from Iraq last month, we had a close Mills family member deployed to Iraq every year since it began in 2003 -- sometimes two at once.
I have spoken out against the Iraq war from the beginning and started blogging on it during my son's second deployment to Iraq, with his full support. Though I don't get paid for it, I've made it pretty much my full-time job, writing about "the troops" and the effects of repeat deployments on their health, sanity, and family life, and trying to end this godforsaken war.
I am often surprised at how little the civilian world truly understands the military mind. After virtually an entire generation at peace (not counting the Gulf War, which ended practically before it began), there are people in their 20's and 30's who have no concept of military life beyond what they see in the movies or on the news.
For one thing, military types don't all march in lockstep anywhere except on the drill field. Some are conservative, some liberal, some in-between, and some don't care either way -- pretty much like the rest of us.
Military men and women everywhere appreciate courage under fire, period. I'd say that most all active-duty military and veterans greatly admire John McCain's service and the sacrifices he made as a POW. So if he comes to speak to them, they are going to leap to their feet and applaud him, cheer him, and listen respectfully to him speak. They might even try and get a photograph with him.
They are not, however, all going to vote for him.
For one thing, every single Iraq vet with whom I have spoken tells me that the one thing they want in a new president is an end to the war. Period. Whichever candidate comes closest to pledging to end that war, that is who has their support. And right now, that's Obama.
Even during the primaries, no other candidate, with the exception of Ron Paul, received as many active-duty campaign donations as Barack Obama. Paul, you may recall, also wanted to end the war.
Now, there are some active-duty and veterans who support McCain, of course, and would like to see him elected, and will vote for him and donate to his campaign.
But not nearly as many as you might think.
As Jon Soltz at VoteVets pointed out once: There is a difference between supporting a veteran's service and supporting his Senate voting record. And a large majority of veterans DO NOT support McCain's record.
But don't take it from me. Let's start by reviewing percentage-point ratings given by veterans groups of both presidential candidates, based on a minimum of 14 senatorial votes cast on issues ranging from additional inpatient and outpatient care of veterans to safety equipment for the troops deployed to Iraq to increased funds for improvements to veterans' health care facilities.
(It should be noted that the most junior senator, Barack Obama, was not in the senate yet during some of the votes counted, and yet still scored higher than McCain on veteran's issues.)
Disabled American Veterans
Key Votes--McCain 28%
Key Votes--Obama 92%
Vietnam Veterans of America
Key Votes--McCain 37%
Key Votes--Obama 92%
Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America
Overall Grade: McCain D
Overall Grade: Obama B
My thanks to T Partier, who posted this at Talking Points MemoMarch 26 of this year
More damning is a piece put together by VoteVets.org, "Senator McCain's Real Record on the War in Iraq," on February 8, 2008.
This is a compilation of quotes given by McCain over the course of the war in which he not only insists that it will be over quickly, but praises Bush and Rumsfeld for the fine job they're doing, and quotes year after year after year in which he insists things like, "We're going to win this thing or lose this thing within the next several months." (November 2006)
It's fascinating reading, in light of his recent reversals from maintaining that our troops can remain in Iraq a hundred years or more to his sounds-better-to-voters idea that the war will be "won" by 2013--just in time for his reelection. (Sounds suspiciously like Richard Nixon's promise that he had a "secret plan" to end the war in Vietnam by the end of his first term.) -- even though he's quoted on September 16, 2007, saying that "I believe to set a date for withdrawal is to set a date for surrender."
In other words, if a Democrat pulls out troops, it's SURRENDER. If McCain pulls out troops, it's VICTORY.
Got it?
But what caught my attention about the VoteVets piece -- is that, not only did McCain vote against adequate rest time for troops who've served multiple 15-month deployments, but that he was one of only 13 senators who voted AGAINST adding $430 million for inpatient and outpatient care for veterans.
Even as he has consistently voted to prolong this war year after year after year at tens of billions of dollars every week, putting unimaginable strain on the troops, who are returning with terrible injuries that require all kinds of care, including traumatic brain injury -- the war's "signature injury" -- which has overtaxed a system completely unprepared to handle the overload of patients from a prolonged war... even so, he begrudges them a measly $430 million bucks, which would be about one day of war-costs.
The most thorough analysis of McCain's war and veteran's votes that I've found so far was posted at DailyKos on February 28 of this year.
Along with voting against adequate troop rest or any end to the war whatsoever, McCain also
** voted against an amendment that would provide $20 million to the Department of Veterans Affairs (the VA) for health care facilities.
** voted against $430 million (mentioned above) for outpatient care and treatment of veterans
** voted against increasing veterans' medical services funding by $1.5 billion
** voted against creating a reserve fund to allow for an increase in veterans' medical care by eliminating abusive tax loopholes
** voted to TABLE an amendment by Senator Dodd that called for an additional $322 million for safety equipment for forces in Iraq and to reduce the amount provided for reconstruction in Iraq by that same amount
** urged other senators to TABLE a vote (which never passed) to provide more than $1 billion for National Guard and Reserve quipment in Iraq related to SHORTAGES in helmets, tents, bullet-proof inserts, and tactical vests
** voted against increasing the amount available for medical care for veterans by $650 million
And of course, even though an overwhelming majority of senators approved Jim Webb and Chuck Hagel's landmark update of the G.I. Bill, John McCain not only opposed it, but he also refused to cast a vote at all. He was one of only three senators who did not vote that day. (One of the others was Ted Kennedy, who'd just got out of the hospital after being diagnosed with a brain tumor.)
McCain's excuse? Fund-raiser.
Attitudes of troops toward the Iraq war has most notably been cataloged in a powerful survey taken by the Center for a New American Security of 3,400 active-duty officers from all branches of the military service, and published in the March/April of '08 issue of Foreign Policy.
Here are a few quotes:
These officers see a military apparatus severely strained by the grinding demands of war. Sixty percent say the U.S. military is weaker today than it was five years ago. Asked why, more than half cite the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and the pace of troop deployments those conflicts require. More than half the officers say the military is weaker than it was either 10 or 15 years ago. But asked whether "the demands of the war in Iraq have broken the U.S. military," 56 percent of the officers say they disagree. That is not to say, however, that they are without concern. Nearly 90 percent say that they believe the demands of the war in Iraq have "stretched the U.S. military dangerously thin.
A full 80 percent of the officers surveyed did not think that the U.S. was in a position right now to handle another war. When they were asked to rate their confidence in the U.S. presidency on a scale of one to ten, the officers gave Bush a rating of 5.5 -- higher than the civilian world rates him but hardly a ringing endorsement.
One of the biggest misperceptions I've seen of civilians toward military is that they assume that military-types are always gung-ho for war.
I can tell you right now that the only troops I've ever seen "gung-ho" are young teenagers on their first deployments who have not yet been asked to fight. I have never, ever spoken to a combat vet who WANTS to go to war or wants to return to fight. Yes, there are some, but the vast majority, those who know the true costs of war first-hand, have no desire to glamorize it.
The survey bears that out. In spite of the fact that Republicans love to paint Barack Obama's emphasis on diplomacy as well as political solutions over military as weak or soft or inexperienced or naive, the truth is that, quote:
Nearly three quarters of the officers say the United States must improve its intelligence capabilities--the highest percentage of any of the choices offered. Active-duty officers and those who have retired within the past year give a much higher priority to nonmilitary tools, including more robust diplomacy, developing a force of deployable civilian experts, and increasing foreign-aid programs.
Again -- in line with Obama's positions -- military officers surveyed repeated that modern warfare is, by its very nature, guerilla warfare and cannot be won by conventional warfare methods. Time and again those surveyed emphasized the importance of increasing our special forces, who are trained in a much different kind of skill-set than the average infantry troop.
Special forces troops go into a hot situation in groups of no more than a dozen. They are usually bearded and dressed in local garb. At least one of them speaks the language fluently and the rest have a rudimentary grasp of it. It is their job to get close to the power-broker of the area, be it a warlord, sheik, or gang leader -- and broker a trade of some kind that will, essentially, rat out the true terrorists.
This has been done successfully with regular ground troops in the Anbar province of Iraq, and is very similar to what SF does all the time. My brother-in-law did much of this kind of brokering with Bosnian warlords, and before he retired, was flown into Afghanistan to repeat the success he'd known in the Balkans.
Repeated deployments have damn near ruined the junior officer corps of the military, with even a historic high of 58 percent of West Point officers quitting the military as soon as their commitment ends, rather than staying to make a career of it.
In other surveys, military families have also soured on the Iraq war an want it to end -- something like 60 percent of them.
These are all issues that concern the military. Do they leap to their feet and cheer a man who held up under five years of enemy torture in a war? Absolutely.
But do they vote for him?
It depends upon how well they know his record. Those who understand that he has voted against veteran's issues far more frequently than for them, will not vote for him.
Cheer for him? Yes.
Vote for Barack Obama?
Probably.











Comments (20)
Awesome post!
Those numbers are shocking.
August 6, 2008 11:34 AM | Reply | Permalink
Yep, very nice post. I've seen some of those statistics before, but tie 'em all up together and it's powerful. If this were shorter (which I'm glad it's not) it'd make a great e-mail forward.
August 6, 2008 12:12 PM | Reply | Permalink
Great authoritative post. I'm impressed!
Thanks!
August 6, 2008 1:40 PM | Reply | Permalink
Deanie
Thank You for sharing. I was somewhat familiar with the percentage of military families that no longer support the Iraq war/occupation, however, it has increased considerably.
Aside from the battlefield death toll, suicides and missing limbs PTSD is the "hidden" cost to families. The numbers are soaring. These are human beings who really need medical assistance, but most aren't getting it. What the families are expected to bear is too much in terms of stress monetarily and psychologically and too often end in suicide and divorce, etc... as a result thereof. It is really sad.
One would think McCain, having been in the navy and a POW, would be, at the very least, somewhat empathetic toward the soldiers' needs thus willing to supply them with whatever they need.
I get the distinct impression that McCain has forgotten and/or just cannot relate to what the soldiers are going through. I don't get it. Surely he is not that calloused?
August 6, 2008 1:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
Well, first of all serena1313, he's a Republican, and they think any govt. program is a "giveaway." But I think TheraP hit it on the head when I first wrote about this back in May. She said she thought that McCain kinda had this idea that, Hey, suck it up like I had to!
August 6, 2008 1:51 PM | Reply | Permalink
Wow. Excellent post. Thanks much.
August 6, 2008 4:01 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks for that post. The number speak for themselves.
August 6, 2008 5:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hi Deanie,
Good effort, however, I take exception to many things in your post.
First, people don't join the service for political reasons, and therefore you are correct that a majority really aren't politically invested in who wins. Maybe that's your experience being in a military family. You don't tell us what anyone in your family thinks of either candidate, though you seem to imply that every one of them wants to end the war
By the Way, my personal feeling - feeling only - is that as a group we would have been more likely to support Hillary over both Obama and McCain; there's not the germ of Clinton hatred among the younger troops
You don't link to these "op-eds after op-eds, blogposts after blogposts" that present McCain as a champion of the troops. I do not read many blogs or opinion columnists so I have no idea what you are referring to - and don't say "it's obvious" without citing a source, because to me it's not!
Also, I take exception to the summary of that study you cite - "dangerously stretched thin"
I beg to differ - and do you really believe that 90% of servicemembers would express their thoughts in that way? Do 90% of your family members say that? I doubt it. Ask them.
There are other points too - I'd be happy to engage.
Thanks
August 6, 2008 6:31 PM | Reply | Permalink
McCain's main achievement in life is to have gotten himself shot down.
His identity: loser flyboy, flyboy who blew it.
He got horribly injured. This is normal in bailing out of a jet, particularly when you do it fast at low altitude, as this ancient mariner did. You hit your knees on the instrument panel as the explosives blast you up out the window, or you hit part of the fuselage or the tail assembly on your way back in the slipstream.
In McCain's case, he was wrecked before he landed in that lake. The Vietnamese had the good grace to save him from drowning, despite the fact that he had been bombing them just minutes earlier.
As for his torture, most of it was two things -- getting the same lousy health care everybody else in Hanoi got -- we were bombing their hospitals among other things, remember -- and ing interrogated in a way that seems to have been merciful compared to what America does to its enemies today.
Who waterboarded McCain? Nobody.
August 6, 2008 6:56 PM | Reply | Permalink
That 90% figure was not mine; it was a quote from the poll taken from 3,400 active-duty officers by a nonpartisan organization. The link to the poll write-up I cited is provided in the post.
August 6, 2008 8:22 PM | Reply | Permalink
Sorry, DavidLJ; in spite of the fact that McCain's record does not support veterans; I take nothing whatsoever away from what he suffered.
In Hanoi they have a statue of a pilot being tortured by being hanged for hours on end by a pole suspended beneath his two broken arms. That statue is of John McCain.
No doubt he was seriously injured in the bail-out, but he was also beaten many times and tortured in ways that I pray we never do to our own captives.
Waterboarding is torture, no doubt about it, but I will not compare which is worse unless I, myself, have undergone all of the above. Only then can I truly judge which is worse.
August 6, 2008 8:25 PM | Reply | Permalink
Deanie: I have sworn off posting on TPM but your blog brought out the Irish in me. Thanks for yet another great post. This is a tough one. McCain was taken prisoner--and yes, we could dispute whether he irresponsibly put himself in harm's way--but he did suffer. And, he most likely suffers from PTSD, in fact, I'm sure he does. So, yes, we must and do honor his service. Yet I have worked in and around veterans health and military health issues for the past 15 years and it is remarkable to me where the brass diverge from their commander in chief (especially this one) when it comes to seeing what we owe our troops and returning wounded warriors. And McCain seems just as callous as Bush/Cheney (the chicken hawks) when it comes to helping our soldiers. I don't get it. My husband is a Viet Nam vet and I have said in other places on TPM that he detests McCain because McCain seems to have learned nothing from war and his confinement. My stepson, his son, is in Afghanistan right now--first tour out of West Point. As you know Deanie, this is a gut wrenching experience, having your child fighting a crazy war knowing that he doesn't have the equipment or resources he needs. If I could fly over there right this minute and cover his body with my own I would. There is nothing that these soldiers want more than is to do the job right in Afghanistan that they need to do, but Iraq is sucking the blood and bodies away from them.
So, I have very little patience with "progressives" fussing over whether Obama is running the right ads, or responding to McCain's celebrity attacks with enough force, or taking the perfect stance on offshore drilling, or voting right on FISA. We are at fucking war, for Christsake, let's bring these people home. And let's vote for the guy who is likely to do it sooner, rather than later.
For anyone reading this, my eternal plea, if you don't have family over there and want to do something real time, is to go to www.soldiersangels.com and sign up to send booty boxes to soldiers or help returning soldiers with the horrendous shit they have to deal with when they come back wounded--like not being able to pay their radiology bill or their phone bill.
Shame on McCain. Shame on him for not supporting benefits for returning troops. Sorry, I get emotional and angry.
Thanks again Deanie, for being there for our troops and for putting your loved ones on the line. Peace to you and yours.
August 6, 2008 9:56 PM | Reply | Permalink
Good posts. I often overreact when I hear people politicizing the war, even when they're not. I will leave it at that.
It's true what you originally said - very few in the military (at least of the lower enlisted) are enthusiastic about McCain like they were Bush.
August 6, 2008 11:19 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thank you for a great post and God Bless the troops who courageously and with much honor do their duty, day in and day out. but let no one forget: being against the policy is not anti-troops. if anyone thinks they are is just wrong, and always will be. the policy was wrong and always will be wrong. the Iraq war should never have been waged. the troops always do their duty no matter what, and always do it for the right reasons: following orders. the orders were were wrong here. the troops expect that the civilian leaders have their best interests at heart, and the countrys interests at heart when they set out on a course of war. well, Bush and Cheney let our troops down, and in a big way. they made an ill-advised, ill-considered, and ill-planned decision to invade and occupy a country that had nothing to do with 9/11 and Al-Qaeda. Bush has shown that he romanticizes war, even wanting to be their with the troops, when he has no concept at all what war really is. i dont either, as i wasnt in the military. but i dont presume to know either. bush and cheney and rumsfeld did, and they were wrong. may they be eternally ashamed of their reckless decisions about iraq. i doubt they will. but im not surprised. god bless the usa.
August 6, 2008 10:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
Found this 2000 article and thought it might interest those reading this thread.
Why Vietnam Vets Split on McCain
Insight on the News, March 27, 2000 by Kelly Patricia O'Meara
http://tinyurl.com/6ouy8y
"....Thomas Burch is a Washington attorney and chairman of the National Vietnam and Gulf War Veterans Coalition, a federation of 102 veterans' groups. Burch tells Insight, "McCain forgot the veterans, and you don't have to search too hard to see where he's dropped the ball." For instance, "McCain would not cosponsor the 1984 Agent Orange Bill, the 1992 Senate Select Committee on POW/MIA Affairs, the 1996 Missing Persons Personnel Act, the 1998 Persian Gulf Health Care Act or the 1999 Bring Them Home Alive Bill. He did cosponsor the 1991 Omnibus Agent Orange Bill, but at that point there was no struggle, it was a done deal. Back in the 1980s when we really needed him he wasn't there."....
August 7, 2008 9:12 AM | Reply | Permalink
Deanie:
One of the best posts I've read on TPM. We're a Blue Star family, and our soldier has experienced Bush's disasters in Iraq and Afghanistan first hand. He's an enthusiastic supporter of Barack Obama, and is dead-set against McCain being president, for all of the reasons you've articulated. I respect McCain for his service. Right or wrong, he put his ass on the line in the service of his country, and he paid a heavy price for it. But my respect ends there. Whatever McCain might have been, he's become cynical, craven, and no friend of service members and their families. God bless and protect you and yours.
August 7, 2008 9:46 AM | Reply | Permalink
tk, I understand COMPLETELY. I hope you do realize by now that this is not an attempt to "politicize" the war--nothing I have ever written has been--but to expose truth that will help voters make up their minds in this most important election in at least 40 years.
Bush and his admin have done nothing but use this war--and these troops--as political chess-pieces. He's used the troops as photo-op backdrops for speeches while, at the same time, refusing to allow journalists to photograph the true costs of war, such as the thousands of flag-draped coffins or even memorial services at Arlington, with family permission.
He and his enablers, most of whom are out of office now, have deliberately manipulated how this war has been fought for no other reason than to grant him and other Reps favor at the ballot, then viciously attacked anyone who objects as unpatriotic. Look what they did to a war hero like Max Cleland. Tell me how "Purple Heart Band-Aids" at a political convention, mocking a man's heroic service, is not politicizing a war.
I don't mean to sound as if I'm picking on you--please don't think I am. I can tell you either have served or are serving now, and I thank you for that service. I guess in my clumsy way I'm trying to say that I think we're more alike than unalike in what sets us off when it comes to this war.
As for myself, I decided to post this after seeing yet another blogpost at another site, describe in detail the apparent adoration of veterans (who happened to be largely drunk or stoned, and at a biker convention)--and the political poster then extrapolated that Obama must be in big trouble with the military vote. I've seen similar in mainstream newspapers and A LOT of this from talking heads on TV.
As you pointed out (or somebody did) the higher up you go in rank, the more of a politician you are anyway, so the more in line you'll be with the admin. But the junior officer corps who've earned their stripes in Iraq and Afghanistan, have practically mutinied against the higher ranks, and enlisted men, well, that's where you'll find truth.
You asked earlier--my son, the Marine Iraq vet, is a solid Obama supporter. Last time I talked to my nephew who did three Marine deployments, he was leaning toward Obama. My husband, a moderate Rep who hasn't voted Dem in our entire 34-year marriage, is a solid Obama supporter, as is my sister, a recovering right-winger. (I haven't asked the other nephews because they've either been deployed or just home and have other things on their minds.)
I will say I've spent many hours discussing these wars with my brother-in-law, the retired BG, and he found none of my concerns to be either unreasonable or partisan. But then, both of his boys are at stake, too.
Thank you for your interest.
August 7, 2008 10:52 AM | Reply | Permalink
God bless you, KateO (and that goes for you too, ADad)--KateO, you expressed perfectly how it feels to have a loved one fight in one of these terrible wars:
"My stepson, his son, is in Afghanistan right now--first tour out of West Point. As you know Deanie, this is a gut wrenching experience, having your child fighting a crazy war knowing that he doesn't have the equipment or resources he needs. If I could fly over there right this minute and cover his body with my own I would. There is nothing that these soldiers want more than is to do the job right in Afghanistan that they need to do, but Iraq is sucking the blood and bodies away from them.
"So, I have very little patience with "progressives" fussing over whether Obama is running the right ads, or responding to McCain's celebrity attacks with enough force, or taking the perfect stance on offshore drilling, or voting right on FISA. We are at fucking war, for Christsake, let's bring these people home. And let's vote for the guy who is likely to do it sooner, rather than later."
I could not have said that better, in any way. This describes what I was trying to explain in a clumsier way, to tk, that when you have a loved one in a conflict you KNOW is being mis-managed (when my son fought in Fallujah in '04 they did not have up-armored Humvees, good body armor, or firearms near as good as that sported by the private contractors)--your anxiety and fear for your child gets all mixed up with a growing FRANTIC sense that he will not have what he needs and that he could die for it and WHAT THE HELL CAN YOU DO???
All I could do (other than countless care packages and cards and letters to them) was speak out--SHOUT OUT--scream and holler and yell and do everything in my own little tiny power to draw attention to these matters while other people obsessed about such heroes as Anna Nicole Smith and Britney Spears.
When people want to argue politics with me and I know they're not really listening, they just like to provoke and start arguments, I say, LISTEN, this is LIFE OR DEATH to me! DO YOU GET THAT? If the wrong person takes a seat in the Oval Office and continues these miserable policies, ONE OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS COULD DIE. My son could be called back into active duty, as could my nephew, and my two who are already on active duty could be sent back easily.
Only one-half of one-percent of this nation's population has been asked to make ANY sacrifice for this miserable war, and we have had enough.
You and ADad both--I will remember you in my prayers, and your precious sons, that they will return safe, in one piece, and of relatively sound mind. And that they never have to go back.
August 7, 2008 11:02 AM | Reply | Permalink
It's an invisible war, except to a very few. And those few are being asked to bear an impossible and unforgivable burden, while others carp about nonsense. There are days when I can't think straight because of my anxiety. The gift boxes are more for me than him. I take comfort that he will soon touch what I just touched, even if it's as silly as a Rice Krispie cake or a tube of toothpaste..it's a connection. And he's only my stepson, but he's been like my own for almost 20 years. I can't imagine how you have survived. I take comfort in communicating with other military families, my work, which focuses on veteran's health issues, and my other two sons, safely at home. Fear that McCain might win just sends me into another spiral of distress. You are right, to some people this election is just a game. To military families it's life and death. And of course the working military knows that more than anyone, so I'm not surprised and I'm reassured that they are not blindly following McCain. In general, they can sniff out a rat better than anyone, and he sure as hell is one.
KateO
August 7, 2008 11:33 AM | Reply | Permalink
KateO, why don't you e-mail me at deaniemills@yahoo.com? We can exchange phone numbers and I can hold your hand on bad days.
It's a grim little fraternity, we combat moms. There are so few people who have even a single NOTION of what it means to go through each and every day utterly terrified. Your child is on your mind every single moment, and you dream of them at night. The only relief are the infrequent phone calls when, for that blessed few minutes, we know for sure they are safe.
I'm a good hand-holder. God knows I've needed my share in recent years.
August 7, 2008 12:20 PM | Reply | Permalink
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