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Are You Cynical?

This morning, a good friend asked me if I was cynical and I’ve been thinking about it all day.

I didn’t start out cynical. When I was young and just forming my opinions about the world, I was full of idealism and purpose. I wanted to live my life in a way that gave back to the world what I had gotten from it. For many years, I tried my best. I worked for nonprofits, I volunteered for causes that were important to me, and I donated money to political candidates who I thought stood for something other than their own self-interest. Then, I stopped.

Maybe it was burn out or maybe it was a shift in priorities but I suddenly felt that I wasn’t making any difference at all. I was getting paid very little to work very hard and I was tired. I left the city, moved home, got reacquainted with my family, and started living a life where I made no difference to anyone except those closest to me. Most days, it didn’t feel all that different, to tell you the truth. And it was nice to not worry about all the bad stuff in the world.

I’m not suggesting that I didn’t care or that I didn’t stay engaged in current events. I just didn’t feel responsible any more. It wasn’t my problem. I could let people in their twenties deal with the heartbreak of incremental change. I was older, wiser, jaded. I knew one person couldn’t make a difference.

I started to think that Washington would never change and that we would never solve the great problems of our time. I started to believe that politicians had no incentive to stop lying because it got them what they wanted with seemingly very little cost to themselves. Those are pretty depressing realizations. And I think they did, in fact, make me cynical in a way that I’d never been before.

Then, along comes this guy with a funny name who holds a pretty high public office. And in his books and his speeches, he made me take a fresh look at the world. The way he tells it, one person doesn’t have to make a difference all by themselves. We can let what unifies us be stronger than what divides us and we can make a difference together.

When I hear Barack Obama speak, I often feel like I might start crying. I get that feeling in my chest and my eyes well up. I’ve explained to people that he makes me want to weep with relief that after eight long years, we can have a smart, articulate, president with sound (and sane) policy ideas. But I think it’s more than that. I think he makes me weep because somewhere inside, I’m still my 22-year-old self, that young woman who was ready to take on the world and make a difference. He makes me hope again that I can.

And suddenly, I don’t feel so cynical. How about you?


Comments (31)

Niiiice, Orlando. You're speaking for me 100% here. Yes, I've been cynical. And at the age of 48, my cynicism has been challenged to believe once again that the world can be made better, that our freefall from grace can be halted and even reversed, given truth, common purpose and hard work.

I'm with you on this. FAN_EFFING_TASTIC post! Highly Rec'd.

Also agree 100%... it's like finally there is someone who is making sense. Finally there is someone who doesn't confuse or conflate negotiation and diplomacy with capitulation and coercion. Someone who is willing to bust through the partisanship, us against them mentality to get things done. So I get your feeling of relief, and pride, and -- i'm going to say it -- hope. Instead of thinking that another four or eight years will go by and nothing gets done, I am hopeful, and energized and forward looking.

Great post! Double Highly rec'd.!!!!

Thanks.

Orlando, you've posted a very though provoking piece - thank you. I've certainly been cynical at times, but more often consider myself a realist. With regard to change (which will be a recurring theme in later posts), I think the advice attributed to Ghandi should be followed first:

"be the change you wish to see in the world."

So if you "left the city, moved home, got reacquainted with my family, and started living a life where I made no difference to anyone except those closest to me,"

perhaps this was a better gift to the world than struggling with Sisyphean tasks, particularly if you brought values with you that you shared with your family and community.

As a realist, I think it pays to remember that the key issue is power, and I like to think we would both be equally disgusted with the state of the government in 1968 as 2008. Power is a tremendously corrupting influence; not many have the strength of character like Washington, who chose to stop after two terms. Or did he? Was he afraid of the political ramifications of a new imperial position in America, when the US was fresh from the freedom from England?

Speeches are great, but actions matter more.I think we've already seen what Obama and his campaign was willing to do to defeat Clinton; they did not engage in mudslinging and there was no mention of Bill Clinton's travails. McCain and his campaign, on the other hand, is an entirely different matter.

Finally, a little pragmatism. The conventional wisdom is that the nation is upset at congress for failing to end the war, amongst other things. But as Pelosi has pointed out, they don't have the votes to do so yet.

In order for Obama to accomplish major changes, the democrats will need 60 votes in the senate, perhaps 61 if Lieberman continues his current course of action. Based on the data I have in www.pollster.com, www.fivethirtyeight.com, and www.electoral-vote.com, it doesn't look likely.

The races that appear within striking distance are Minnesota, Mississippi, Maine, North Carolina (surprise), and there has been talk on TPM about the Oregon senate race as the republican incumbent furiously distances himself from McCain and Bush in a blue state.

To accomplish big changes soon, we'll need help from those states. In the meantime, I'm working on some small changes, including walking to our farmer's market tomorrow for some locally grown and produced fresh food, direct from some of my neighbors. It's a start...


Great post. A lot of us here at TPM I believe are holding up masks of cynicism but are more than willing to put them down and let our hopeful hearts shine out if given half the chance.

Thanks for providing such a chance.

When I hear Barack Obama speak, I often feel like I might start crying. I get that feeling in my chest and my eyes well up. I’ve explained to people that he makes me want to weep with relief that after eight long years, we can have a smart, articulate, president with sound (and sane) policy ideas. But I think it’s more than that. I think he makes me weep because somewhere inside, I’m still my 22-year-old self, that young woman who was ready to take on the world and make a difference. He makes me hope again that I can.

Exactly! Orlando, you've captured precisely why I signed on to support Obama. I wasn't interested until I heard him speak for the first time and I thought, "Wow, this guy is different." I have the same response. He makes me feel hopeful - like maybe, just maybe, we could have a government that I could actually believe in. It's why I love to listen to his speeches with my teenaged son. I make a point of saving the transcripts when I can. And after I get home, we watch them together on the computer. And sometimes we discuss some of the finer points over dinner. Or not. But I always get the sense that we're sharing in a moment that we'll look back on as a turning point in our history. Like it really means something. Hope. Change. They're not just buzzwords this time around.

Thanks for this post - great way to start the weekend. :)

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Beautifully said, and I really think---well history shows---mountains can be moved when people unite for a common purpose.

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At heart, every cynic is an optimist.

I don't know where I got that idea or who said it, but I think it's true. There's nothing really wrong with cynicism. It's a rational response to a world that lets you down. The goal is to not let go of the optimism. Hope, but don't expect anything.

I used to think about this a lot, when I was a 22-year-old cynic. Actually, I owe a lot to a conversation I had one new-year's eve with one of the smartest people I've ever met. I was claiming (with pride) the mantle of cynicism, and she warned me that the natural next step was bitterness, which might be funny in a cabaret show, but not a pleasant way to live. Instead, she recommended skepticism, which has served me well ever since.

While I appreciate your candor and the depth of feeling which which you've expressed yourself, I can't help but feel some concern that you've found yourself a hero. And like all heroes, he'll let you down and leave you cynical once again. Every compromise he makes will sting and every mistaken notion will burn.

So, I'll recommend to you what has helped me: skepticism. At this point I should say that Obama is by far the best candidate for President for whom I will have had the opportunity to vote. But it's not because he makes every good thing possible. Of course he doesn't. I can't deny that he inspires in me an enthusiasm I thought was gone, but my good friend skepticism reminds me not to get carried away.

Instead, I recognize several things about Obama that I feel cannot be products of my own idealism: by all accounts of his time at the University of Chicago, he's a natural-born teacher, a critical skill in an effective executive; he talks about issues as if the electorate is comprised of adults, not petulant children (I'm looking at you McCain campaign); and he's generally on the right side of most important issues; oh yeah, and he's really smart.

So, I don't mean to splash cold water on your bubbling passion, but you shared, and I felt like sharing in return. So, if what you're feeling now works for you, run with it; nearly anything's better than cynicism.

Ah, but with age comes a certain amount of wisdom, which you might also call skepticism.

I understand now, better than I ever could have at 22, that life is filled with compromise. Obama understands it too, and he articulates his willingness to compromise as well as he articulates anything.

He is not my hero. Nor is he my sherpa, my teacher, my crush, or my Rasputin. He is, ultimately, just a man. But he is a man that I have chosen as my leader because he inspires me to be a better version of myself. To be, as Ghandi said and AlaskaSense mentioned above "the change I want to see in the world."

I fervently hope that more than 50% of the electorate makes the same choice. If not, I might find myself cynical again. And that would be a shame.

Apologies if I came off as lecturing. Cheers.

Pickabone, you didn't come off as lecturing at all. You were just making a few assumptions that I don't think apply to me, that's all. Acutally, his willingness to compromise is one of the things I like best about Obama.

shhhhhhhh...(spoken very quietly) I don't think you're supposed to say the "c" word (compromise) here. It makes people crazy!

Then, along comes this guy . . . . Orlando

Well, Charlie Brown, as P.T. Barnum said, "There's a sucker born every minute."

Ellen, you could do with a healthy dose of hope and a lot less cynicism. Might make you nicer.

Orlando...Obviously, I feel EXACTlY the same way you do, hence the name..."stillidealistic." Amzazing how the words of this man can evoke the same feelings in so many people. At the ripe old age of 56, he's made me remember the teenager that worked for Bobby Kennedy... Feels good, doesn't it?

Your words are descriptive of your chosen avatar, an eclipse; a shadow cast upon the light yet the light is not diminished and the darkness in time is transcended.

The above comment was in response to Lux Umbra Dei but reply link missed.

I'm still cynical. I spent 20+ years in the construction industry. I developed a fairly well-tuned BS detector. I think I can often recognize when someone is blowing smoke.

I have also sat by and watched for many years as Republicans and Democrats alike have repeatedly, with zeal and with negligence, violated their oaths of office to protect and defend the Constitution.

I listened to Speaker Pelosi "take impeachment off the table."

Obama wasn't my first choice, because I knew a lot more about other candidates. The one who seems most dedicated to upholding his oath got tagged with the loony label because of some cockamamie UFO story. Lo and behold, the one I then decided to support got caught messing around on his cancer-afflicted wife! (Newt's in the back, going "Damn, that's one stupid Democrat.")

Now here's Obama, saying "have hope." But the problems our nation faces have been so obvious, yet so ignored, that hope isn't getting me very far. I'm still gonna vote for the guy because he is head-and-shoulders above his competition, even if all he brings are empty words. They're at least the rightwords, and that's a start.

Great post, Orlando.

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What do you think Obama is going to change, Orlando?

BevD,

From what I've read and seen from Obama, he seems to have a fundamentally different approach to problems. He's always framing things in a broad context. For example, on the abortion issue, he's solidly pro-choice. But he doesn't just say that we need to preserve a woman's access to safe and legal abortion. He says that, and then he goes on to ask why women are having abortions in the first place and whether there is anything more that can be done to prevent unwanted pregnancies. That's a change.

His idea for transparency in goverment, with a variety of searchable public databases for legislation, fundraising, and lobbying is a change.

I think he's committed to ending gridlock and fighting over stupid stuff and that is a HUGE change.

I think we've already seen a change, because of his campaign. Young people are involved in the process in a way we haven't seen in a while. Two million people have donated to his campaign. Yes, he gets the big donations too, just like every other candidate. But his grassroots support is unprecedented. His fifty state strategy (for which part of the credit has to go to Clinton for staying in the race so freaking long that he had to campaign in every state) is going to change the Democratic party at every level, right down to school boards.

I can never think of everything that I like about Obama and anyway if I made a list, it would be too long to read. But one of the things from his book that struck me the most was when he talked about how America was suffering from an empathy deficit. He wasn't just speaking about Washington, and I think we can see that bearing out right here at TPM. People just don't listen to the other side anymore. We all just scream about how we are right and we refuse to accept anything but total agreement with our own points of view. Anyone who doesn't tow that line is dismissed, sometimes with not very nice lanaguage. I think that a leader who looks at every point of view and works to forge solutions that, while not perfect for everyone and maybe therefore permanently imperfect, will at least move us forward as a country. That is a fundamental change from the past 20 years.

About that last part, I should add that whether we think we do or not, we look to our leaders as models. So, if the yahoos in Washington are making zero effort to understand the opposing points of view, why the hell should we?

When we have a leader who is willing to acknowledge that there may be more than one "real" path, that attitude will hopefully infuse the entire country again.

By the way, I don't think Obama is going to wave some magic wand, and *poof* all better. That's John McCain's gig. Remember what he said: by 2013, the war will be over, we won't need foreign oil anymore and monkeys will fly out of his ass. (Okay, I made that last part up, but I think it's equally plausible.)

However, I do believe that with some hard work, sacrifice, and persistence, we can solve these enormous problems that we face. We need a leader who believes that too.

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I'm cynical about politicians and hopeful about people who aren't politicians.

I'm still cynical a little bit. It must be because there are too many jackasses in the world. :)

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Maybe it's more skepticism than cynicism.

RTBAG, I must apologize. I misread your comment and based on some things I've seen you say in the past, I replied not very nicely (even though I was half-way teasing).

I read your comment as "I'm cynical aobut politicians and hopeful people who aren't politicians."

I missed "about" which changes the whole thing. My bad. Sorry.

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Perhaps you misread me once or twice in the past as well.

Excuse Me!

But the sentimental, self-indulgent, contentless posturing evident on this thread is enough to make anyone reading it "cynical."

Sentimental: yes. Self-indulgent: probably. Contentless: arguably. Posturing: not really.

Thanks for the Charlie Brown link though. Funny.

All those times, and still he believed. Poor sap. Still, there's something so sweet about his lack of guile and his refusal to give up hope. He is a truly uncynical archetype.

I'm not afraid of criticism, Ellen. And certainly you're entitled to your own opinion. I just happen to think that maybe sometimes you're a little bit too much like Lucy, at least here at TPM. She made people laugh, but did anybody really like her?

I'm a New Yorker, so in kindergarden we learned the ABC's: A is for Apple, B is for Brooklyn, C is for cynicism. But cynical isn't necessarily a bad thing as long as it is tempered by other things.

In my case, I am also very much an idealist that believes in core, progressive values like universal healthcare, economic fairness, etc. That for me was why I supported Hillary Clinton. I wanted proof, not words. I wanted excruciating policy detail, not rhetoric. And I wanted evidence that she would be a fighter to champion those progressive ideals once she was president, not water down her principles to compromise with the opposition.

The democratic party chose Obama as the nominee and while I would have made a different choice, I support him despite the lack of firm evidence of his dedication to my core progressive values. This support is not based is not based on a blind trust though. What I know about Obama is that he is infinitely better than McCain for sure. I trust that his core values will guide him when elected. I hope to elect a more progressive Congress that will make us have to compromise much, much less often and push Obama to the left (rather than having him pushed to the right by the GOP). And I am cynical enough to believe that Obama, should he want a second term, will make good on the hope that he has inspired and cater to the progressive, liberal base that put him in office.

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