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This Bud's for You, Belgians
Dear InBev,
This Bud's for you. Don't gloat about it.
So it turns out that America's premiere brewing company, Anheuser-Busch, will soon become Anheuser-Busch InBev, thanks to your generous buyout offer to A-B stockholders. Apparently, most of them sobered up when your offer reached $70 a share.
Here in my native St. Louis, the birthplace and headquarters of the King of Beers, many workers are worried that you plan to cut costs by cutting jobs. But this would not be wise, since they account for nearly half of A-B sales anyway.
On a personal note, I will miss the times when I drank myself silly on A-B products. Of course, I would miss those times even more if I could recall any specifics. Surely, you at InBev understand, as you have been brewing beer in Europe longer than you can probably remember, either.
Please remember to thank our president for doing a heckuva job on the economy and lowering the dollar's value so much that the takeover of A-B became a no-brainer for you. Next time, don't be shy. Just come on in and look around. You might see something else you like. Watch for the Yard Sale sign on the Statue of Liberty.
Well, Belgians, guess I'll close for now. Like I said, this Bud's you. Please take our Bush, too.
Comments (34)
July 14, 2008 9:08 PM | Reply | Permalink
damn tags!
July 14, 2008 9:09 PM | Reply | Permalink
when that happens to me, I just pop the top on a brewski
July 14, 2008 9:10 PM | Reply | Permalink
Good idea. Only I don't like beer. ;(
I know. Heresy!
Margarita but only on weekends. ;)
July 14, 2008 9:28 PM | Reply | Permalink
They can move the Cards to Brussels and call them the Belgian Fries (or Brussel Sprouts?). Hope the fans get used to the multiple flavored mayonnaise. After monk's ale, I'm not sure what they see in rice beer anyway, but good luck.
July 15, 2008 7:37 AM | Reply | Permalink
We Cards fans don't care what flavor the mayo is.
Deep fried Cubbie tastes great with anything.
July 15, 2008 12:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
Quinn, I never liked you.
July 15, 2008 2:22 PM | Reply | Permalink
Post a list of major world events since the Cubs last won a World Series. Please. :-D
July 15, 2008 5:26 PM | Reply | Permalink
Moses parting Red Sea...
Destruction of Carthage....
Invention of moveable type....
Budweiser (Europe) developed....
Budweiser (US) developed...
Harry Caray born....
May have been a coupla Cubbie wins in there somewhere. Wasn't paying attention. Must've been something on tv/radio/victrola.
July 15, 2008 7:46 PM | Reply | Permalink
Bite your tongue. :) Actually, the Busch family hasn't owned the Redbirds in a while, so that's at least one entity they can't sell out.
July 15, 2008 5:25 PM | Reply | Permalink
As a fellow St. Louis resident, I'm officially in mourning. I agree that the weak dollar and Bush's economy helped to make this possible. However, I think some of the blame lies with the higher powers at A-B. My feeling is that they got a little too comfortable in their position, and allowed the company to become stagnant (and as a result, the stock price became stagnant).
I think we all know that InBev is going to cut jobs (mostly white collar, but probably some blue collar, too...). Rumor has it that apart from renaming themselves A-B InBev, they're moving their world headquarters to our wonderful city.
Some of my fondest memories of St. Louis involve me taking first-time visitors on the brewery tour, then heading over to Soulard to drink some more in the shadow of that historic building. Here's to hoping (raising my beer glass) the Belgians reaize that any major changes will cause even more resentment toward them here in the U.S., particularly in St. Louis.
July 15, 2008 8:40 AM | Reply | Permalink
Let's have a beer together. Email me at eddiestinkypants@att.net
July 15, 2008 8:54 AM | Reply | Permalink
Sounds like a plan. Do you work at AT&T, or are they just your ISP?
July 15, 2008 9:11 AM | Reply | Permalink
ISP
July 15, 2008 2:18 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hm, I had not heard anything about making St Louis the world headquarters. Were that the case, the whole thing would not be so sad. That said, I have little hope of that. We will be the "north American headquarters" (which equals nothing at all), just like we became the "midwest headquarters" for SBC after they moved the world headquarters to San Antonio, and the "American headquarters" of Purina (equally worthless) after they were bought out by Nestle, and the "American headquarters" of Panera after they were bought out by that French company whose name escapes me (etc). Basically, we have Monsanto and ExpressScripts left by now (and God only knows how much longer we will have even those two at this rate). My only hope for St Louis' future is that when global warming raises the sea levels so far that Manhattan, Miami and Los Angeles are all submerged, those folks will have to move inland and we will have a lot of cheap real estate sitting there available at that point.
July 15, 2008 10:31 AM | Reply | Permalink
Triple Brewed Abbey Style Bud. It has a certain ring.
July 15, 2008 9:40 AM | Reply | Permalink
Do these Belgians understand that they're not really buying a beer company, but rather a place that sells colored water?
July 15, 2008 11:15 AM | Reply | Permalink
Holy Shiiiiit! Anheuser Busch makes BEER??? Well that little fact certainly puts things in a different light! God, there's enormous potential I this buy-out, I think. Imagine it:
New Bud - This Time With FLAVOR!
Bud Plus - With HOPS!
Beer From Europe - 0% French Content!
July 15, 2008 12:30 PM | Reply | Permalink
And if Toyota would buy Ford....
And the BBC buy Fox....
The French to buy-out Wonderbread....
The Norwegians to buy-out Exxon....
And Venezuela to buy-out our.... President.
"Quality. Job One."
July 15, 2008 1:21 PM | Reply | Permalink
(This for AdAb - below.)
July 15, 2008 1:45 PM | Reply | Permalink
Ah oui, le Wonderbread!
July 15, 2008 4:16 PM | Reply | Permalink
Those French, if they it had their way, would force us to buy bread at a local bakery rather than at the bread aisle. Quel horreur.
July 15, 2008 5:48 PM | Reply | Permalink
I'd be more concerned that In-Bev management may decide that "Americans are GOING to drink decent beer, whether they like it or not" and institute major changes to the product line.
I for one welcome our Trappist Ale overlords!
July 15, 2008 12:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
Great news. If only now the Belgians would also purchase Herscheys. We may then also have to suffer real chocolate rather than the pukey throat burning stuff we all cherish and love.
July 15, 2008 1:08 PM | Reply | Permalink
Don't like American companies selling stuff to Americans?
July 15, 2008 2:21 PM | Reply | Permalink
Belgians do not mind American products, and I doubt Americans mind Belgian products, with the obvioius exception of Jean-Claude Van Damme.
July 15, 2008 4:43 PM | Reply | Permalink
LOL!
July 15, 2008 4:56 PM | Reply | Permalink
All the best to St. Louis.
July 15, 2008 5:58 PM | Reply | Permalink
CHOCOLATE!
Damn you. Now I have cravings.
July 15, 2008 5:45 PM | Reply | Permalink
Bon appétit, ma chérie.
July 15, 2008 5:57 PM | Reply | Permalink
This is part of some nefarious Belgian/Flemish/Walloon plot:
I'm supposed to believe it's coincidence that in same week InBev buys AB, the Prime Minster of Begium Resigns? It's as if they're saying, now that we have AB, we don't need to pretend we're a real country any more!
See Obama! This is what happens when a country goes all bi-lingually!
July 15, 2008 1:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
Dude's a Walloon. Whaddya expect?
I'm joining the Ultra-Walloons.
July 15, 2008 1:46 PM | Reply | Permalink
Guess what I just deduced...
Anheuser-Busch owns Rolling Rock.
InBev owns Anheuser-Busch.
Ergo, by the transitive property of ownership, InBev owns Rolling Rock.
Ponder the implications amongst yourselves.
July 15, 2008 2:09 PM | Reply | Permalink
That the King of Belgium = The King of Beers = The King of Rock'n'Roll?
July 15, 2008 5:49 PM | Reply | Permalink
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