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Know Your Cuts of Meat: Ryan Lizza
Well, I can't read minds, and none of me choice friends in high places are returning my phone calls, so I can't tell for sure Ryan Lizza was intentionally dropped from that flight or it was just overbooked (funny, he seemed to have been everywhere for the first 6 months of the year - with McCain, Clinton & Obama..). And whether it was retribution for that tacky cover? Don't know that either.
But what I do know is that buried beneath the hooplah surrounding the cover, the article Lizza wrote on Obama's time in Chicago is well worth reading whatever your persuasion. Please click the Rec button if you agree.
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Comments (58)
Yeah..... And please click Rec'd on all my future posts if you think Thomas Wolfe and Tom Robbins are worth reading.
Damn fine scam. Wish I'd thought of it.
Hey! If you cried when Bambi's Mother died, please rec. That's for my next one.
July 22, 2008 9:04 AM | Reply | Permalink
Quinny, Stop trying to be me. I'm tired of talking to myself. And Des, didn't we agree not to mind share until the universe stops expanding, reconstitutes itself, string theory and black matter fuse into nothing-matters which makes the History Channel find Stephen Hawking and see if he has anything to say? Christ, chimp.
An agreement is an agreement.
July 22, 2008 9:40 AM | Reply | Permalink
Oh oh, the trifecta has appeared, now only needing Billy Glad for a collective mindfuck.
Say it loud, say it clear:
Des=Q=Blueguy=a work in 3 parts, by Billy's sinister mind.
E=MC5 Albert Einstein Kicks out the Jams.
Thermonuclear meltdown! Abort! Abort!
Back to the Monolith! Back to the mothership!
July 22, 2008 9:47 AM | Reply | Permalink
Ya see, here's the proof that the pseudo nazis can't follow this shit at all. We sit here laughing at all this, because these nitwits have nothing better to talk about than us.
They still can't see the distinctness of ourselves. And really, all you nit-nauts, can you really suppose that the chimp is Old Guy ! Come on. And you newer nit-nauts, I've said who I was so many times it's tedious to recount.
Quite the funny, eh chimp? Of should I talk in total crap speak and say :
Wot u dooing, des, I weally weally wish that u waz here, yez, dez
i'm a wittle wittle baby...at TPM-aholics
Christ, what kind of grownup talks like that? And they think Cypher is infantile?
I'll have to include "nit-naut" in my upcoming guide to crap-speak under "elevated C-Speak: how C-slang takes on a literary
airs."
Are u guys laughing yet :) :) :) :)
July 22, 2008 10:02 AM | Reply | Permalink
This is so great, I speak a l'il crap speak and a li'l chimp speak and a l'il Canuck speak and then people think ah'm 3 diffn't critters! Howsya lahk dem apples??!! Oh wait, better straighten out my wrinkles, gotta come back as the stern Billy Glad. "Ho ho ho, who's been eating *MY* porridge???" Har har har, that were a good wun. Mah mah, hey hey. Mah diffrunt mahnds r heah 2 stay. It's better to blog mob than diffurenshi-ayte... Mah mah, hey hey.
July 22, 2008 10:21 AM | Reply | Permalink
Billy, that lost soul. Takes himself a bit too seriously these days for his own good. He just needs a good fight, and without one, he's just fighting himself. Lost talent, there.
Chimpela, you seem happy and content. Aber kein geil at TPM, gel?
July 22, 2008 10:55 AM | Reply | Permalink
Es ist Sommer, zuviel Ferien usw., mann muss etwas tun, aber schade dass hier ist so müdlich.
July 22, 2008 11:03 AM | Reply | Permalink
du hasst recht, Des, aber Ich habe alles vergessen--and wasn't good at it anyway. Das, die, der....Dem .....DES !
July 22, 2008 11:56 AM | Reply | Permalink
That's right, I'm just a genitive article searching for a place to lay my hat.
July 22, 2008 9:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
Glad's not gonna appear. He understands rules. Discipline. Can't have the four travelling on one ship. Risk of decapitation. Though Blue-dude may have some prior experience with this, so I defer.
Actually, no. Fuck deferring. And De Fuhrer.
July 22, 2008 10:09 AM | Reply | Permalink
I thought I might draw Billy out by claiming that I coined "nauts"
without mentioning its derivation from the original Gladism "Obamanauts.."
Maybe he'll come out and play, or fight, or something. Someone ought to go and get that old pic of billy, and come on with it...
I would, but I hold to some sense of loyalty here...
more than others at times
July 22, 2008 12:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
"Thermonuclear meltdown! Abort! Abort!
Back to the Monolith! Back to the mothership!"
Does this mean that we can ad Pirate Pete to your alleged repetoire?
July 22, 2008 10:40 AM | Reply | Permalink
Damn, kat's out of the bagg, gonna have to ki... here kitty kitty kitty, here kitty, now get back in there, that's right, here purr purr purr....
July 22, 2008 11:05 AM | Reply | Permalink
Repetoire, not abbatoir, ya idjit!
(Lady..... read the title of his "post." Violence inherent in his system. Please. Think of the kitties.)
July 22, 2008 11:22 AM | Reply | Permalink
Oh, sorry, guess I need to brush on my French. Tasted durn good though.
July 22, 2008 11:29 AM | Reply | Permalink
Tell me about the rabbits again, Quinn, tell me, okay? Will ya?
July 22, 2008 11:30 AM | Reply | Permalink
wabbits wabbits did u say wabbits
i'm so vewry vewry happy if dats wot u said
i'm just a wittle baby :)
July 22, 2008 11:58 AM | Reply | Permalink
The rabbits were HUGE. The size of barnacles. OLD barnacles. And teeth? Teeth like rats. With knives. Hundreds of 'em. The rabbits, not the teeth. Bloody hell, NO MAN could count the teeth.
So there was I. Me. Both of us. Just me and my trusty Mujahideen. That's our name for a toque. It's French. Mujahideen, not toque. They were all talkin' shite to me. No no, Shiite. It's a type of talk, son.
They were everywhere. I faked to the left, no dice. I leapt to the right, surrounded. So then I just killed the fuckers with my bare hands and ate their hearts. Go to sleep. Kids of today. I donno.
Hit me.
July 22, 2008 4:00 PM | Reply | Permalink
Guess we ain't gonna have that rabbit farm with alfalfa after all, eh George?
July 22, 2008 9:25 PM | Reply | Permalink
You actually think that Pirate Pete is Des ? No one told you that I'm Pirate Pete. Geezzz.. and our styles are so similar.
July 22, 2008 12:11 PM | Reply | Permalink
That's the "Killer Bambies" for my favorite Canadophile, and next post will be "do it for Ashlie - or she buys one". Actually I was threatening to pull Tinker Bell's wings off a few days ago and that didn't get your glands in a knot. Selectively offended. But I'll be careful not to say "Des=Q" in the near future - I know it would be impossible to tell us apart without autopsy forensics, and I'm certainly not looking forward to that little ritual.
July 22, 2008 9:42 AM | Reply | Permalink
Tinker Bell was muscling in on my action. Besides, those fairies have been getting a little too aggressive lately, even coming into McDonalds.
As the site says, "I am a christianand God says they are an Abolition and God will deal with them. joyce”
'Nuff said. Tear it's wings off? Fuck that. Go for the heart & you got yourself a rec.
July 22, 2008 10:17 AM | Reply | Permalink
Jugular, I learned juguling in high school and people always called me a jogular fella...
July 22, 2008 10:23 AM | Reply | Permalink
Jitterbug Perfume is great, but after that I always felt that if you'd read one Robbins book, you'd read them all.
July 22, 2008 5:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
Yep.
July 22, 2008 6:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
Still Life, Cowgirls count. But yeah, after that, pretty much the death. Although, we got Matt Ruff now. Sewer/Gas/Electric. Fool on a Hill. Those worked for me.
And as Code said, Neal Stephenson. He liked Cryptonomicon, I'm more Snow Crash. Taste, eh? Crypto.... bah.
July 22, 2008 8:28 PM | Reply | Permalink
Another Roadside Attraction. Once again I find myself in a travelling circus.
July 22, 2008 9:27 PM | Reply | Permalink
And BTW, I don't believe that this post was rec'd by real people.
July 22, 2008 10:04 AM | Reply | Permalink
I tried to disable it. Got no nails, so I tried my teeth.
Seems I got none of them either. Monitor's clean now though.
July 22, 2008 10:12 AM | Reply | Permalink
Wow, you ruined your caps - that's gonna cost a fortune in dental bills.
July 22, 2008 10:13 AM | Reply | Permalink
Tinker Bell was muscling in on my action. Besides, those fairies have been getting a little too aggressive lately, even coming into McDonalds.
As the site says, "I am a christianand God says they are an Abolition and God will deal with them. joyce”
'Nuff said. Tear it's wings off? Fuck that. Go for the heart & you got yourself a rec.
July 22, 2008 10:18 AM | Reply | Permalink
Jugular if fairies have jugulars.
Next post will have "Recommend if you love puppies". Just to show I have a soft side.
July 22, 2008 10:34 AM | Reply | Permalink
How about "if I kiss your ass enough and pretend I'm your avatar friend and say I'll always rec your piece no matter how vapid it strikes me, will you please rec mine? Nothing lower than begging.
July 22, 2008 10:50 AM | Reply | Permalink
For a guy with no legs you don't have to get down on your knees to slide across the floor. "I'll come running to tie your shoes, I'll come running to tie your shoes...."
July 22, 2008 10:54 AM | Reply | Permalink
A legless head and a chimp walk into a bar......
July 22, 2008 10:56 AM | Reply | Permalink
And say to the good-lookin', intelligent bartender (avec tubes)....
July 22, 2008 10:59 AM | Reply | Permalink
"I can see what you're thinking - the butt of another amputee on the monkey bars joke"
July 22, 2008 11:11 AM | Reply | Permalink
I was thinkin' more along the lines of "That'll be two Rye & 7's. Please."
More potential. Though monkey bars are always good.
July 22, 2008 11:19 AM | Reply | Permalink
Take two: And the barkeep says, "Hey you big ape, no resting your head on the bar"
July 22, 2008 11:20 AM | Reply | Permalink
Take 3: And say to the barkeep, "one coffee and a double bourbon". The bartender starts to hand the chimp the bourbon, but he declines, saying "no thanks, not for me - it goes straight to my head".
July 22, 2008 11:38 AM | Reply | Permalink
I'm just the set -up guy for the quinn/des vaudeville show. I'd say that I was the straight man, but that would be a stretch.
July 22, 2008 11:52 AM | Reply | Permalink
Being set up with bourbons ain't bad. Better than being a sidekick.
July 22, 2008 11:58 AM | Reply | Permalink
anything sideways is bad for me....quite the headache really.
I'm still trying to stretch.
And stop taking me down from the bar and putting me on the stool. Are you embarrassed to be with me ? Didn't we have this discussion with the head-shrinker?
July 22, 2008 12:08 PM | Reply | Permalink
Answered in Take Two above - not my decision.
July 22, 2008 10:08 PM | Reply | Permalink
Winner. Your 3rd take's always the best Des. Which reminds me of a song. No no, no need to applaud. "The thirrrrrrrrd cut is the deepest, baby." Makes me teary, that. Rod. Lost so young.
July 22, 2008 12:00 PM | Reply | Permalink
We could really use crick-crick about now, this blue-blue-orange thing is really tedious.
Calling avatars with interesting colors and shapes. Just show up and relieve all this boring chit chat among the same personages !
At some point, I admit, talking endlessly to myself is quite a problem.
Are you boys laughing yet?
July 22, 2008 12:14 PM | Reply | Permalink
I've got a side humor thing going over there. Everything's funny in its own way. As George Thoroughgood said, "Now you funny too".
July 22, 2008 9:31 PM | Reply | Permalink
Gotta run. Be back later. You guys need some more company.
July 22, 2008 2:03 PM | Reply | Permalink
Although, you seem to be doing quite nicely just the three or one of you. :)
July 22, 2008 2:04 PM | Reply | Permalink
My feelings precisely, GFTB. ;)
July 22, 2008 2:24 PM | Reply | Permalink
Let's hear it for the ladies. Really, we need a ladies thread, us dudes will just shut up (except for a bit of Blue murmuring crap speak, the boy can't help it...)
July 22, 2008 9:29 PM | Reply | Permalink
these are the only two ladies around, des
July 22, 2008 9:34 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nonsense, Viv'll show up and Cricket and MonicaL and Worker Bee & CPaige & Dij & the other party girls of TPM. Maybe wet blogging, won't that make the blogosphere stand up and take notice? Woops, scratch that.
July 22, 2008 9:55 PM | Reply | Permalink
Pathetic attempts at playing men. Pathetic attempts at playing human. Pathetic attempts in a room.
July 23, 2008 3:00 AM | Reply | Permalink
And a fat lot of good you two did me today, eh?! Let's wind 'em all up with our colourful expressions & pretty-boy avatars and leave 'em to Beaver-boy. Cheers on that, eh? Billy, pulls an economist & hikes to the exit as soon as the doors open... Blue comes in long enough to fuck things around like a Bull in a nunnery... Hey! Nice "Fuck Off" you got off there Blue! And you. Mr. Des. Luncheon in Siena? Nice? Sun? Stays just long enough to start hitting on the hostess, then he's off like a fuckin' Ferrari.
While I get to be Mr Sincere AND Mr Hothead, same day. Oh well. Had to happen. Once a Goon, always a goon. My bad.
Nonetheless. Revenge - dish best served, then reserved. then sandwiches. Maybe soup. Oh.... you'll pay, my pretties. Wakened in the night to the sounds of your fine little brightly-cloloured selves choking on... what's that?..... what ever could it BE?.... why dear, it looks like.... yes. That's right, Bingo Bango and Bluto. Little blue pipes wrapped round yer neckstal tissue, one end pumping bile into those wine-engorged bellies.
Sorry Blue, I know this won't work for you. I'll come up with summat.
Hell, I think I collected 13 apologies today, and made 14. About par. And yadda yadda, take no prisoners, make no apologies, don't be so earnest, the fight must go on... where's the bathroom. Thanks for all the fish. Bastards. The lot of ya.
Tra la, tra la......
I want my sandwich back.
July 23, 2008 3:04 AM | Reply | Permalink
Except, when you joined them in their game, then all was well and you ambushed just like they did. Now the awakened will do what? Ark Ark Ark! Mars Attacks!
Better go back to sleep.
July 23, 2008 3:19 AM | Reply | Permalink
Didn't quite grok all that powdered wig apologizing stuff. Sorry, oh, so sorry, no I'm sorry, no I'm sorrier, may I cut in to say I'm sorry too? Too much groveling, not enough growling.
July 23, 2008 6:15 AM | Reply | Permalink
Just for the record, Sir Duds - on the "ambush" as you call it. Check the time-clocks. Yva's post was up, and I was well into the commenting, hours before this even appeared. I believe the Mssrs Orange & Blue also showed up there 1st, as well. So just in case you might have been under the misapprehension that this was some sort of place where an "ambush" might have been planned, you have your watch on upside down. In addition, this is a damned poor place to do that, in a post with 35 Rec's - with a half-dozen brave/foolish souls dropping in to comment.
And please do re-read my 1st para which you commented on. Four got painted with one brush - one of the four, essentially "run off." Wasn't surprising that they felt somewhat drawn to a discussion on the virtues of the paint job. Or rather, as I was saying - 3 got drawn to it... then 2 buggered off for brighter climes when the shouting got too loud and the apologies began running down the cheeks... and that left Little Mr Over-Earnest In His Short Pants here to wade through.
"Ambush?" In short, yer Honorable, NFW. Nuff said.
July 23, 2008 7:11 PM | Reply | Permalink
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