RIP JESSE HELMS

I always wonder what it is that makes someone do harm to people who've
done nothing to them; where does that hate come from? In other words,
what was it inside of Jesse Helms that made him spend so much energy
trying to hurt gay people?

I
asked the same about Rick Santorum, all those guys who seem to have
enough intelligence that evolution is a possible outcome. I don't mean
big "E" evolution. I mean the kind of evolution that comes from
humility and an ability to examine one's prejudices and see them for
the bigotry they are.

I have to say that, in my four-plus
decades of life, I've yet to find anyone who's desire to harm others is
anything but a misplaced desire to kill something inside themselves.

I
remember watching "B-1" Bob Dornan attack with a violent demeanor a gay
activist he was debating on one of the networks. I watched him react to
the activist's calm statements with "vein in the forehead" screaming.
And I realized: Bob Dornan is gay. He can't stand it and he has to
attack all those who ARE gay to help kill it inside himself.

I
remember when I was in high school, all the guys who announced most
loudly their conquests with women, in every case, they wound up coming
out of the closet later on down the road.

It's pretty much a
spiritual axiom that any time one is bothered by someone else...that
person has to look inside him or herself to see what's REALLY bothering
him or her. It's such a simple truth.

So back to Senator
Helms. What was it inside of him that he was able to express not only
satisfaction, but genuine glee at hurting gay people? He always seemed
happiest when he was hurting people. It was painful to watch and think
of all the pain inside of him that made him so happy to spend energy on
hurting gay people.

And all that energy spent by people to
hurt gay people, who have never been anything, but, ahem, Christian to
them, has an effect. It does the trick it's asked to do; it means that
gay people grow up and come of age wondering about their own existence.
Then they hide and, in their hiding, they come to loathe themselves,
and in their self-loathing, they discover a gnawing need to do harm to
others in order to kill that part of themselves.

In other words, I've just outlined how we wind up with Gay Republicans.

I
hope Senator Helms has found his inner peace. I have to figure that God
welcomed him and said, "It's OK Jesse; all is forgiven."