Dear Gotalife:

Whoever you are, wherever you are, toight is the night that I would have asked you to sign an autograph for my children. If I had children. You are an awe-inspiring fighting figure who has spent day and night laboring for free speech and, as a positive externality to the rest of us, some midnight laughs. The reason I would have asked for an autograph would not be to excite the hypothetical child (as any child of mine, bearing the genetic burden of a family of kooks, would be too used to eccentricities to be impressed by you) but more to humor you, lest you forsake this site. I want you here!

And I believe I am not alone here in coveting your polite, reasoned comments. There is a big fan club out there in the big big world, and all those fans, your fans, dance around in the streets and shout your name (or would if they knew your real name). I only rue that you stopped posting and for some time have been only commenting. The balance of your views in those posts was sweet, yet sour, almost like that crispy fried chicken I ate the other day (and still remember fondly).

But I digress, let's come to tonight's topic. Senator Clinton has finally lost and while I am sure that you will not congratulate Senator Obama if the life you got depended on it. And this is fine, as long as you stay and keep us amused.

Please, everyone, join me in my humble plea to keep gotalife with us and not banish that titan of thought to the annals of history!

Kind regards,

The Lunatic

P.S. Apologies for taking a mickey here (you seem like the kind of guy who needs those things pointed out, or else they might not register), but you have worked hard toward the goal of making yourself a sitting duck and you have exceeded all expectations.

P.P.S. Go ahead, make fun of the name I used to sign this; I hear it is a popular tactic in kindergarten.