« previous | TPM CAFÉ READER POSTS HOME | next »
John McCain Literally Is Your Man!
Well it looks like we have a decision. You all have decided to put this young Irish whippersnapper, Bartalk O’Bomber, up against my best friend of 847 years, John Sidney McCain.
And what’s your message? Change?
Good luck with that.
Nobody can change like John McCain. John McCain can change so quickly that he can become Bartalk O’Bomber before you can even pull the lever to vote for the guy. It will be like one of thoe episodes of Star Trek where there’s two Kirks and Spock doesn’t know who to shoot. You’ll be Spock.
If O’Bomber’s slogan is “Change We Can Believe In,” then John can just change his slogan to that. Or he can mess around with it a little and go with “A Leader We Can Believe In.” And then, everytime O’Bomber says “That’s change we can believe in,” John can just say, “That isn’t change we can believe in.” It also works to do this: “That’s change we can’t believe in,” or even this: “That’s change we can believe in. (Pause) Not.”
If O’Bomber has a Web site, John can just make his Web site look like O’Bomber’s.
John McCain can change anything at any time. He can be for telecom immunity one day and against it the next. He can be pro-choice one day and pro-life the next. He can want tax cuts for the rich or not. He doesn’t hold any of these opinions so deeply that he can’t change them on a whim. That’s why he’s going to win. This is a race for the presidency, not an opinion contest. If your opinions are so important to you that you won’t change them to get the presidency then run to be an opinioner. I want a president who wants to be president. Like John McCain.





Comments (13)
John McCain will meet them with fire and shoes and golf gear! And they will be defeated. And he will tee off on their rotting corpses!
June 5, 2008 7:20 PM | Reply | Permalink
John McCain can change his gaze from one tele-prompter to another, while changing his statement mid-sentence.
John McCain can change from being a straight-talking maverick who carried himself with pride, into a right-wing blathering robot who smiles at his audience in the hopes that they will clap their hands, maybe hold up a rally sign now and then.
A sad, sad year for McCain. A sad, sad year for Republicans.
I really liked him once.
And then Iraq happened.
I really liked him once.
And then Barack happened.
June 5, 2008 7:39 PM | Reply | Permalink
Highly recommended this post of yours, Pal.
June 5, 2008 7:41 PM | Reply | Permalink
Here you go folks. From the mouth of a Republican -
From: Henry Lenoir
I have a theory about John McCain based on my twelve years in line fighter squadrons.
McCain is insane. The unimaginable sufferings he endured in Communist prisons unhinged him permanently.
Flying fighters in the 1980s and 90s, I got to know several Vietnam POWs including some who had been captive even longer than McCain’s five and a half years.
All were unbalanced. The ones I knew who were long-time POWs—with one exception and that exception I knew only very slightly—were high-functioning lunatics. Common denominators were trouble with alcohol, cars, divorces, tempers and aggressive flying verging on recklessness—a very unwelcome trait in a fighter pilot.
Bear in mind that they were all in good enough shape after prison to get back into line fighter squadrons. But while McCain was able to get flight orders after Hanoi, he was never assigned to a line attack squadron or a carrier air wing again.
Arizona Senator John McCain III went to the U.S. Naval Academy because he was the grandson and son of Admirals John McCain Sr. & Jr., both Annapolis graduates.
McCain Senior was a distinguished fleet commander in the Pacific War who rotated command of the fast carrier task force with Admiral Marc Andrew Mitscher. The only reason Mitscher didn’t get his fourth star was that he died, totally worn-out, a few months after V-J Day.
Junior McCain rose to be Commander-in-Chief of the Pacific during Vietnam. Because of the bizarre chain of authority, he was nominally General William Westmoreland’s commander.
McCain III, however, was a mediocre midshipman (894 of 899 in his class) who became an average attack pilot with a history of foolish mishaps in the training command and the fleet. Without the admirals in his family tree, I doubt his career would have survived his crashes.
McCain’s getting shot down might have been as much a tactical blunder as an act of God. He was badly injured in his ejection, and the North Vietnamese Army – as was typical – gave him no real medical attention. That he was tough in captivity is beyond dispute.
McCain also – again as was typical of the long-time POWs – spent at least two years in solitary. Once he got out McCain stayed in the Navy but was not promoted to flag rank, retiring as a Captain in 1981. With his POW service, probably the only thing that could have kept him from promotion to Captain would have been raping the Chief of Naval Operation’s daughter at high noon on the Mall.
Should the fact that the Navy passed on a third consecutive Admiral John McCain tell us something? Maybe – in 1980 anyway – the collective wisdom of the Navy was greater than that of Arizona’s voters a few years later.
The combination of the moral, mental and physical injuries of years of captivity deranged McCain. Like many of the other POWs I know, McCain has a sense of superiority to those who haven’t suffered what he has.
McCain doesn’t listen. He likes to stir things up---like his “Banana Bill”--- but I don’t see any principled pattern to his outbursts. Compounding his problem, McCain must be in chronic pain from injuries that never healed properly. He may be medicated.
Anyway, although he is a Republican, I think it would be a disaster – as bad as Bush – if John McCain were to become President.
McCain does far too much harm already, right where he is.
June 5, 2008 8:28 PM | Reply | Permalink
Comparison of McCain to his father and grandfather via a simple Google search reveals the following worries:
1) Of the three, Grandfather the highest achiever, but totally "duty, honor"obsessed (where have we heard those words?);
2) Father, like McCain, graduated near the bottom of his class at Annapolis; and
3) without POW experience, Father's behavior demonstrated poor impulse control, early on: a)went AWOL to elope when there were rules in place to automatically grant leave for that purpose; and b) as submarine commander, hit one early target, then missed all the rest for the duration of the war.
It is interesting to note that McCain looks, not like his high achieving grandfather, but almost exactly like his father, indicating high levels of DNA similarities. My question: If his Dad went AWOl because following procedure was just too much trouble, would McCain decide to bomb Iran in a moment of impulse, just because checking with Congress would be too much trouble?
Also of marginal interest (and a little spooky) to note in passing is that McCain's dad married a woman who looked remarkably like his estimable father (tall, skinny, beaky, as compared to short and compact). And McCain's current wife, Cindy, is in the same tall, skinny,beaky mold. Hmmm.
Is this stuff petty and mean-spirited, or worthy of real concern?
June 5, 2008 10:21 PM | Reply | Permalink
Truly, haven't we had enough of questionable, ambitious sons of achieving fathers? I'm no shrink, but isn't there something at work here that should give us all pause. Yes, he wants to be President, but really, for what? Like President Pinocchio he is showing signs of being a casual liar if the truth doesn't fit him.
June 6, 2008 6:38 AM | Reply | Permalink
From watching over the last couple weeks, I think he is going for the pity vote. His performance recently has been pitiful.
June 6, 2008 9:01 AM | Reply | Permalink
McCain is basically a decent guy, but he's way out of his league up against Obama. Obama has charisma, McCain has anti-charisma. To top it off, he has an anger problem that his campaign has trained him to handle by pasting a phony smile on his face when he feels rage coming on.
McCain is going to get buried with the rest of the Republicans in November.
June 6, 2008 9:29 AM | Reply | Permalink
Methinks I smell a wrestler herein.
Recom-ed.
June 6, 2008 9:53 AM | Reply | Permalink
John McCain's speaking style... it's s if he is reading a story, he doesn't know the story, so it's news to him...and he talks as if he is reading it to a six year old. Thay may be how he relates to himself. Seriously, I can't stand it... I can't pay attention to what he says because I feel as though he is talking to his puppy dog and not the me or the american people.
June 6, 2008 10:06 AM | Reply | Permalink
Sorry, I really could use an edit option...
June 6, 2008 10:12 AM | Reply | Permalink
Ah, you have said the magic words, Star Trek.
There are deep forces at work here against McCain, and they haven't yet been sufficiently considered.
"Obama, Spock, and the New Start Trek Nation"
http://msa4.wordpress.com/
June 6, 2008 5:44 PM | Reply | Permalink
P.S. That's Star Trek, without the t.....
June 6, 2008 5:45 PM | Reply | Permalink
Post a Comment