Reader Posts

« previous | TPM CAFÉ READER POSTS HOME | next »

Avatar Time

avatar

I am a luddite.  I have no idea how where avatars come from and then made part of a person's identity.  So I don't have one, and to hide my ignorance, I have pretended that I don't have one because I'm much too groovy for such insignia.

But, now that my champion is out of the race for good (even though I did write that she was toast after Indiana), and now that we have nothing to fight about (hee), it's time to throw the avatar issue into the ring.

Here's my proposal.  I am asking  folks, if they could spare the time, to propose an avatar for yours truly.  The winner will typecast me into perpetuity and have a $50 donation made by me on their behalf to a favorite cause or charity (such as the Clinton debt-relief fund for example).

I need a judge or judges.  If you would like to volunteer for that role let me know.  I'm kind of leaning for someone like the kid Greg from Missouri, because he's nice.  But anyone will do.

Vital Statistics:
Male
Age 48
Married (Round 2)
Jewish (who has banned himself from most discussions about Israel)
Four Kids (22, 20, 18, and 1)
New Yawker thru and thru, with time spent in midwest and the nation's capital (hee)
Big Yankee Fan (Bobby Murcer belongs in the Hall)
Union lawyer
Crotchety son of a bitch
Looks like a cross between Danny Kaye and a canteloupe

Let's play avatar.  And if you don't wanna play, then so be it!


Comments (83)

avatar

Editor's Comments:

Second sentence should read: "I have no idea where avatars come from and then made part of a person's identity".

Also, to clarify, the contest winner picks the charity, not this disgruntled Clinton supporter. Worry not, the money will not go to the Clinton debt-relief fund if you can somehow struggle and then manage to think of something more worthy.

OK, so working on fun stereotypes of Jewish New Yorker, here's one for you:
http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~abh2n/tmp/bagel_avatar.gif

Delicious idea. We definitely need more food avatars, if only to remind us to reserve some time for sustenance in our busy blogging schedule.

I'm for the bagel idea too.

Either that, or a pair of matzah balls.

avatar

Thanks Chino. Love the luddite options, especially the first one. I don't think the Danny Kaye/melon thingie shows up but I can just imagine. :)

Sounds like fun :)

I'm still thinking, but here's an initial suggestion:

http://www.newhampshire.com/doclib/celebrity/salinger.jpg

avatar

Salinger?? Do tell why!

avatar

Great start Ben. So far you're the judge, jury and plaintiff. I do love a good bagel, but I'm at the point in my life where I have to scoop out the inside first to save on calories.

By the way, I do have a real story about bagels and the economy. This past Sunday morning we had some elderly cousins of my Dad's over for brunch. Of course, typical Jewish reality, we told them to come at 10:30 and they showed up at 10 and they were famished. I explained to my wife that elderly Jewish folks don't do brunch and they like to eat breakfast no later than 7 a.m. (even on Sunday). They also like stuff like pickled herring in cream sauce, a half a pound of which I had dutifully purchased on Saturday evening (try it, you'll like it).

In any event, before they arrived that morning, I stuck the baby in the stroller and we walked to 81st and Broadway where the famous H&H Bagels is (I don't think they're that good but that's another story). I had the person give me an assorted dozen, and then she rang me up and announced that I owed $15.60. The thing is that I only brought 15 dollars with me, thinking that I would get the bagels and then maybe stop off for a coffee to go somewhere. Honestly, I had no idea that bagels had shot up so much in price.

Of course, the cashier felt sorry for me because I had a bunch of impatient folks behind me and I had the baby, so she let me go. But, can you believe the price of bagels these days? We have have real problems according to the bagel meter.

But, can you believe the price of bagels these days? We have have real problems according to the bagel meter.

That sounds suspiciously like kvetching to me. ;)

Hey, if you want any of the other images resized to the necessary width or auto-leveled, etc., I'm your guy. I love using GIMP!

avatar

Thanks Ben. Much obliged. What's a GIMP? LOL

GIMP is the free and open source answer to Photoshop. If one's using Linux, it's definitely the way to go.

GIMP = GNU Image Manipulation Program, for those wondering about the acronym.

GNU = GNU's Not Unix, for those wondering about that (recursive) acronym.

avatar

Gee thanks, much clearer now!

The operating system should be called GNU/Linux. Linux is just the kernel.

- RMS

(I kid, but only because I love. Power to the Penguin!)

I go with your Danny Kaye reference:
http://simplyclassics.net/coppermine/albums/danny%20kaye/normal_50458035_10.jpg

avatar

I'll get around to it one of these days, but I really don't like them very much. They seem somehow to be an invasion of privacy and anonymity.

I'm from rural southern Ohio we don't know from bagels. The guy who rents the vacant lot next to the gas station every summer and sets up a fish fry shack has increased his prices by 50 cents, but your fried fish fillet on soft white bread with your choice of Miracle Whip or Mayonaise can be offset by picking up a can of offbrand pop at the gas station instead of a cold coke from the iced tub on the shaded side of the truck. And for Christ's sake kids, stop leaving the empty pop cans on the picnic table it attracts the sweat bees.

making me hungry...

avatar

And he's one of the most talented cursers I've ever heard.

avatar

White Bread?

Mayo? That's French, right?

Hey Bev, you wanna judge? Heck I even trust you. :)

avatar

Sure, I'll judge - do I get to choose the charity? My son's unit has a family readiness group which has a fund that pays for home/car repair for families whose dad/husband/father is deployed - you've never seen people so grateful for a donation.

avatar

Heck, that's perfect Bev, I mean Judge Bev. It'll be my pleasure. The wife of the president of my principal client is very involved with a similar group of marine parents on Long Island (there son just finished two tours). Wonderful cause, and I will be honored to contribute to it on your behalf.

Here you go, BevD, one designed especially for you with your fried fish fillet and can of pop.

http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~abh2n/tmp/meal_avatar.gif

avatar

I might go for that one, Ben.

Harpo?

Bobby Mercer in the Hall? why? Who is next Yankee fan. Graig Nettles?

avatar

You gotta problem with Nettles? But, hey, remember Bobby Murcer batted second in the '71 series in old Tiger Stadium. And he got a single up the middle in his first at bat. Doesn't that qualify him for the Hall?

avatar

That is, the '71 all-star game; Yankees weren't near the series in '71.

And won't be this year either :)

How about a Murcer pic for your avatar:
http://www.bobbymurcer.com/Web_Gallery/fmt_i0012.jpg

avatar

Nice, and see even then Bobby was a peacenik. By the way, Bobby is recovering from brain surgery for a cancerous tumor. He's my guy.

No problem with Nettles, Just with Yankee fan wanting everyone in pinstripes to be in the hall. I can hear the calls from Chris Chambliss and Mickey Rivers coming now!

avatar

Good ears! Remember, Game 5, 76 playoffs, Yankees and Royals. Bottom of the ninth, Chambliss leading off, and BOOM! Hall of Fame shot.

Horace Clark?
Oscar Gamble?

Best yet: RON BLOOMBERG!
http://www.yankeetradition.com/bloomberg.JPG

Ron Blomberg was the first major league player to appear as a DH, back in 1973.

Oscar Gamble had a great afro back in the '70s, and this wonderful quote:
"When I step into the batter's box, I am in scoring position."

Go classic bslev:

http://tinyurl.com/3d4c2l

avatar

The Babe! Nice. He was a Clinton supporter clearthinker, did you know that?

Hey, it's your avatar... you have to be happy with it.

If I win, I'll let you know where to send the $50. Now, judge on the basis of the avatar, only.

Right? ;-)

avatar

You mean rulez are rulez? Asking alot clearthinker.

I know. Especially from a Hillary supporter... ;-)

Nice one. Can someone find a way to morph The Babe into Joba Chamberlin? That would be a kickass avatar.

avatar

They do kinda look alike, dontcha think?

Since you claim to favor the Union, an assertion of dubious truthfulness given your sudden adherence to the dogmas of the charlatan Obama, you should select an avatar such as a portrait of General Sherman. He is as popular in Georgia as that tribune of sneering youth ever shall be. Bah!

avatar

I know who you are crankypants. You can't fool me mister/ms/or whatever. And you made me cranky. Alas, the good general is now in the ring. But, you know, if nominated, shall I wear his avatar if he still says no, no, no after all of these years?

avatar

Well, the clock is ticking and if this doesn't get recommended some more, I think we are left with the entries submitted thus far. Bev D is the judge and, in her honor, in addition to the 50 bucks for the winning avatar, I will also donate another $50 to the organization she referenced above that is helping the families of soldiers in Iraq. Get those submissions in folks!

avatar

Heck I can't believe this made it to the big board. Well this is for a good cause folks. I'm in Judge Bev D's hands; the avatar she picks is the one I don. Now's your chance to get me back for all those things I've written folks. :) My avatar, my identity, is out of my control and in your hands.

By the way, as stated, the winner gets to pick where I send my donation, and Bev D also gets a matching donation to her worthy "family readiness" group in Ohio, which assists military families with sons and daughters and spouses in Iraq. Hey Bev, why don't you print the name of the organization, and maybe we can get a couple of more dollars sent there from the good folks at TPM.

avatar

As a fellow luddette, I am seriously contemplating donating my personal choice (for myself) of an avatar to you although you may not appreciate a picture of Laurie Mylroie as a stand-in.

Getting real, how about a pic of Mel Brooks at the appropriate age?

I would request that you donate $50 to one of the schools in Oregon the Clinton campaign has stiffed.

This one, as the debt is over 60 days in arrears, would be my choice:

"$1,384

OWED TO: Bend-La Pine School District

WHAT FOR: Bill spoke March 20 to about 2,500 people in the Bend Senior High School gym, where he joked that he’d offered to wash local Democratic superdelegate Wayne Kinney’s car windows. (Kinney later endorsed Obama.)

WHAT IT WOULD BUY: Gas for 51 school buses from Bend to Mount Bachelor and back."
http://wweek.com/editorial/3430/11055/

avatar

lally:

An excellent cause indeed. I would expect nothing less from you. Always a pleasure, sort of. :)

avatar

Ooops. That's my wife. What she said though lally. She signed in to TPM and is prepared to propose my nose as the avatar. I have no additional comment.

avatar

Thanks abster, I think.

;>}

and Bruce, did the abster give you leave to out her as your wife? I'm sure that you are relieved that she didn't provide a pic of your nose altho Bev would never....er...pick it.

All the hockey mojo you'll ever need:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3189/2554469277_9c5d042c4f_t.jpg

Er, Ceci n’est pas Henry Fonda

It's Tom Joad.

avatar

Hey bug:

Tom Joad is my guy! And you know that he's always going to be there, right?

:)

It's a really good one, man. But what a responsibility.

avatar

He led me.

Here's one of my favorites. I could never live up to it, but I think you can.

http://work.colum.edu/wordpress/briley/files/2007/11/murrow.jpg

avatar

I think you could live up to him actually, but I don't think I have a stable enough demeanor, and I quit smoking. The other problem is that I don't want to be compared with Keith Olbermann, who seeks to compare himself without any rational basis to the great Mr. Murrow.

I am having a hard time here. Two posts swallowed with the cryptic message that they are being held by the blog owner. What does this mean? Am I going to be charged? I thought they were of age.

I will take them one at a time.

First, I have always wanted a Shelley Winter avatar:
http://www.observer.com/files/imagecache/article-teaser/files/082905_article_doonan.jpg

Second, I am reminded of this guy, also from the Poseidon Adventure:
http://blogs.warwick.ac.uk/images/ccarter/2004/10/22/borgnine.jpg

Third, if you're looking to impress the ladies:
http://img.timeinc.net/people/i/2006/specials/sma06/blog/061120/paul_newman_320.jpg

Too many links....

Moderation is the key to success

-workerbee's mom

You mean a moderated forum, right? ;-)

From your lips to god's ears.

Fourth, I don't care about the NRA, this kicks ass:
http://www.templeton-cambridge.org/fellows/grossman/publications/2007.03.07/americans_get_an_f_in_religion/img/charlton_heston_plays_moses.jpg

And let's not forget Ron Bloomberg upthread.

avatar

Armchair:

You have outdone yourself with recommendations and I am flattered. Either that or your like the folks I see at the 7-11 buying 30 Lotto Jackpot tickets! Much obliged, and it's in BevD's hands so I hope you've been nice to her.

avatar

"you're". It's contagious around here.

Baseball ones have already been suggested. How about something from the crotchety aka disgruntled variety.
http://ccinsider.comedycentral.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/10/11/bruce.jpg

I like the simplicity of this one to the "Bobby Murcer" theme:

Murcer autographed ball

It's too big for an avatar, but if you don't feel confident about reducing it down yourself, I'd be happy to do it for you.

avatar

Thank you. That's very kind, and this luddite will definitely need help with whatever avatar is chosen for him. No joke: I didn't even know what an avatar was until TPM changed the software in the beginning of the year.

Danny Kaye with glasses photo shopped in.

Mrs. No Pic. You remind me of someone I once knew.

Someone old, someone new, someone snarky, someone blue

You have a good ear, beach girl.

avatar

Well, well. Many great options. This is off the big board, but thanks to all. I'm going to ask Bev, if she sees this, to wait until Sunday or Monday to make her choice (to allow anyone else wants to throw a proposal into the ring). Bev, hopefully you'll see this and let me know somehow what your selection is. I'll repost with my decision and announce the winning charities, etc., etc., etc. Many thanks to all.

Here's a question bslev. Are you going to keep your voice, or adopt the voice of your avatar? If the former, we have to find one that fits your voice. If the latter, you have to make a commitment to stay in character. Or I'll have to run you and your new avatar off.

avatar

I will keep my voice Billy, silent Rs and all, but I will need to hear from you if you sense I am beginning to run astray. You must continue to guide folks like me, and don't just go running me off without giving me a couple of chances man. In the meantime, please help by proposing a fitting avatar, and like any advocate, be mindful of who the judge is.

Just use your own photo.

avatar

I have to go with Tom Joad from Worker Bee. It's a beautiful photo and perfect for a union lawyer.


The Family Ready Group will appreciate this more than you can imagine

FRG, Attn Mrs. Wells
478Th En. Bn.
75 Carmel Manor Dr
Ft. Thomas, KY 41075 2393

This was fun Bruce, enjoyed it!

Oh my!

Well, if you decide to use it, Bruce, I went and sized it and tweaked it for you.

Here's how you upload it:

1. Go here:

http://img379.imageshack.us/img379/4475/bslevtomjoaddc3.jpg

And download the resized image to your computer to a place you remember. I think you shift click on the image and say "save image as" but I have a mac, so it may be a bit different for you.

2. Click on the word "(EDIT)" next to the words "MY PROFILE" under the TPM masthead.

3. Scoll down until you find The words: "Photo (max 64 pixels wide):" and hit the "browse" button.

4. Locate the file you just downloaded, and click on "open"

5. Hit save.

Three or four tries ought to do it.

:)

Sometimes you have to clear the cookies in your browser from this site before you see it.

Good luck.

As for my charity of choice, I can't imagine a more worthy one than Bev's, but feel free to buy me a virtual beer here:

http://my.barackobama.com/page/outreach/view/main/TPMObamaBeer

:D

If Mrs. Bruce is looking for an Avatar, I'd suggest one of the women saints, although you are Jewish, somehow it would seem appropriate to me. I'll be happy to forward some suggestions.

Heh.

avatar

Thank you Bev, and congratulations Bug! And thanks to all who participated. I will attempt the avatar installation this evening, and will endeavor to live up to the high standards set by Mr. Joad (and his author of course).

Bug, your choice of Bev's charity is both gracious and an example for the community. I am happy to contribute on behalf of both of you. What do I say on the card, however? This is on behalf of BevD and the Workerbee (aka bug) from TPM. They'll think I'm nuts! :)

Post a Comment

Inside Cafe



Cafe Features


August 18-22

Book Cover

September 1-4

Book Cover

September 8-12

Book Cover

September 15-20

Book Cover

October 6-12

Book Cover





Book Club Archive



Masthead

Editor-in-Chief
Josh Marshall

Site Editor
Lila Shapiro

Intern
Al Shaw



Subscribe to TPMCafe's feed.
Subscribe to TPMCafe's reader blog feed.

Advertise Liberally
Share
Close Social Web Email

"To" Email Address

Your Name

Your Email Address