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To Clinton and her supporters: what are you going to do, bleed on us? The primaries through the eyes of Monty Python
Clinton: I move for no man.Obama: So be it!Obama and Clinton: Aaah!, hiyaah!, etc. [Obama beats Clinton in Iowa and Virginia]Obama: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.Clinton: 'Tis but a scratch.Obama: A scratch? You're behind in the delegates!Clinton: No, I'm not.Obama: Well, what's that, then?Clinton: I've had worse.Obama: You liar!Clinton: Come on, you pansy! [clang] Huyah! [clang] Hiyaah! [clang] Aaaaaaaah! [Obama beats Clinton on Super Tuesday and in Potomac primaries]Obama: Victory is mine! [kneeling] We thank Thee Lord, that in Thy mer--Clinton: Hah!The skies will open, the light will come down, celestial choirs will be
singing and everyone will know we should do the right thing and the
world will be perfect! Come on, then.Obama: What? BLACK KNIGHT: Have at you!Obama isn't a Muslim, as far as I know
Obama: Eh. You are indeed brave, Senator, but the fight is
mine.Clinton: Oh, had enough, eh?Obama: Look, you stupid bastard. You've got no states left.Clinton: Yes, I have.Obama: Look!Clinton: Just a flesh wound.I remember landing under sniper fire. There was supposed to be some
kind of a greeting ceremony at the airport, but instead we just ran
with our heads down to get into the vehicles to get to our baseObama: Look, stop that.Clinton: Chicken! Denounce and reject him Chickennn!Obama: Look, I'll have your leg. [Ayers reference] Right! [whop] [Obama cleans up in Indiana and North Carolina]Clinton: Right. I'll do you for that!Obama: You'll what? Clinton: Come here!Obama (supporters): What are you going to do, bleed on me?Clinton: I'm invincible!Obama (supporters): You're a looney.Clinton: The Black Knight always gets hard working voters: white voters! Have at you! Come on,
then. [whop] [Obama gains needed delegates in Kentucky and wins in Oregon]Clinton (supporters): Oh? All right, we'll call it a draw and take Vice President. ARTHUR: Come, Edwards. BLACK KNIGHT: Oh. Oh, I see. Running away, eh? You yellow bastards!
Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite
your legs off! I remember what happened to RFK!
Yeah, that was fun. This was a quick project, so I'm sure most of you guys could do it better.
Comments (8)
Okay, let's try this again:
Clinton: I move for no man.
Obama: So be it!
Obama and Clinton: Aaah!, hiyaah!, etc.
[Obama beats Clinton in Iowa and Virginia]
Obama: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
Clinton: 'Tis but a scratch.
Obama: A scratch? You're behind in the delegates!
Clinton: No, I'm not.
Obama: Well, what's that, then?
Clinton: I've had worse.
Obama: You liar!
Clinton: Come on, you pansy!
[clang]
Huyah!
[clang]
Hiyaah!
[clang]
Aaaaaaaah!
[Obama beats Clinton on Super Tuesday and in Potomac primaries]
Obama: Victory is mine!
[kneeling]
We thank Thee Lord, that in Thy mer--
Clinton: Hah!
The skies will open, the light will come down, celestial choirs will be
singing and everyone will know we should do the right thing and the world will be perfect!
Come on, then.
Obama: What?
BLACK KNIGHT: Have at you!
Obama isn't a Muslim, as far as I know
Obama: Eh. You are indeed brave, Senator, but the fight is mine.
Clinton: Oh, had enough, eh?Obama: Look, you stupid bastard. You've got no states left.
Clinton: Yes, I have.
Obama: Look!
Clinton: Just a flesh wound.
I remember landing under sniper fire. There was supposed to be some kind of a greeting ceremony at the airport, but instead we just ran with our heads down to get into the vehicles to get to our base
Obama: Look, stop that.
Clinton: Chicken!
Denounce and reject him
Chickennn!
Obama: Look, I'll have your leg.
[Ayers reference]
Right!
[whop]
[Obama cleans up in Indiana and North Carolina]
Clinton: Right. I'll do you for that!
Obama: You'll what?
Clinton: Come here!
Obama (supporters): What are you going to do, bleed on me?
Clinton: I'm invincible!
Obama (supporters): You're a looney.
Clinton: The Clinton Campaign always gets hard working voters: white voters! Have at you! Come on, then.
[whop]
[Obama gains needed delegates in Kentucky and wins in Oregon]
Clinton (supporters): Oh? All right, we'll call it a draw and take Vice President.
ARTHUR: Come, Edwards.
BLACK KNIGHT: Oh. Oh, I see. Running away, eh? You yellow bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off! I remember what happened to RFK!
May 25, 2008 10:00 PM | Reply | Permalink
MUCH better in the second version. Recommend with a laugh out loud.
May 25, 2008 11:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
I did miss a few spots, though.
When I posted elsewhere, somebody said "beat'd" and showed me this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oO5soX3iLtk
May 26, 2008 12:10 AM | Reply | Permalink
I used to write this kind of thing when I was in highschool. What TPM needs is a Kiddy Korner. But this is much better than the guy who thinks he's a song writer and calls his work "epic." He even copyrights his trite "lyrics."
May 26, 2008 9:02 AM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks for keeping TPM honest, Deep Thought. I used to draw what I believed to be profound analogies to sci-fi movies in high school and thought that I was the cleverest kid in the whole school. Only my teachers wouldn't let me get away with just stating the analogy. I had to actually explain it.
I also used to make myself feel smart by calling everyone else stupid and immature. Even when I grew older and learned that it was rude to call people stupid, I could still be arrogant. I later came to understand that my arrogance was a reflection of my intellectual insecurity.
May 26, 2008 5:14 PM | Reply | Permalink
It's soooo freakin' true....my sides hurt from laughing at the visuals dancing through my head!
I wish someone would put this together like they did "The Empire Strikes Barack"
Thank You!
May 26, 2008 9:47 PM | Reply | Permalink
Sorry. You blew it. Couldn't get the formatting right. Therefore your post gets ignored.
May 26, 2008 2:29 AM | Reply | Permalink
No soup for you, Otto!
May 26, 2008 7:25 PM | Reply | Permalink
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