Reader Posts
« previous | TPM CAFÉ READER POSTS HOME | next »
Prince Is My Revolution
I've been thinking today about the divide that separates the people here who are aligned with Michael Jackson from the people who are aligned with Prince.
I'm not sure what it is that separates us, but I think I can tell you something about why, no matter what she does, I will always come back to Prince.
And I'll warn you now. Nobody who is aligned with Michael Jackson will get it. Nobody will change his or her mind. And to some of you, most of what I am about to tell you will be impossible to believe.
So I'll start with something easy. Prince and I have been together a long time. We have a history. You know the story.
We'd had twelve long years of album oriented rock. We turned them out, and the contemporary R&B era began. You know the rest. You know the good and the bad of the Prince years. And during those years, Prince and I grew older together.
Now I have to warn you that in a minute I am going to quote from a genre film, Purple Rain.* So if you don't like quotes from movies, particularly ones that glorify slapping your girlfriend, this is a good time to tune out.
Because we are at the part now that you will start finding things hard to believe.
To some of us, maybe more to me than to most, Prince was a continuation of the Revolution, even after he changed his name to unpronounceable symbol, and got rid of the band the Revolution.
To me, Prince and the Revolution were about hope and change. And, for me, they delivered. They made America a better place to dance and sing songs about self-stimulation.
I really believed that Prince would die. He would die 4 U. Darling if you want him to. U. He would die 4 U.
But then came rap. And the rap years have been long, dreary years of no hope, no style, no promise. Just a slow, torturous descent into dissonance. From the Tupac assassination, to Slim Shady, to the harshest Dr. Dre wannabes, it has been a permanent war on all that is good.
And still I looked to Prince to turn the tide.
He did that crappy Graffiti Bridge movie and I left him. I come back, and I realize he's only 5'3" and I leave him. I come back, and changes his name back from unpronounceable symbol to Prince and I leave him. I come back, and he releases a whole album about orgasms called Come. I leave Prince and always I come back.
Because to me, even after he got rid of Wendy, Lisa, and yes, the Revolution, Prince is still my Revolution.
And, as time goes by, I hope everyone committed to Michael Jackson will continue to feel that way about him, too, even though it seems like he was guilty, but O.J. was too, you know, and he's still at large, even though he had to sell his Heisman to pay for his lavish Florida estate.
So you can be the President.
Prince would rather be the Pope. Peace.
*Purple Rain (1984)
Comments (74)
Troll Heisman of the night award.
Prince/Michael '08
April 9, 2008 11:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nothing compares 2 U, articleman!
It's a metapost, albeit a subtle one.
April 9, 2008 11:57 PM | Reply | Permalink
Allsburg, you have a strange definition of "subtle". It would be amusing to me if this post hits the recommended list, but Glad's doesn't. Then this would be a meta post without an object post.
PS I hope you realize that I picture you as a talking baby. I'd like to see you face off against Elliot Ness. He looks like he could kick your ass though.
April 10, 2008 12:26 AM | Reply | Permalink
My wish is that it accompany Glad's post onto that list. Glad is such an iconic Hillary lover, and beliked gadfly, that his post will flout the antiHillary recommend bias and make it. I just wanted it to have a playfully belittling companion, because it was a tad dramatic.
April 10, 2008 12:38 AM | Reply | Permalink
Congrats. You made it. Now the race is on. Reality or snark. Who will win?
April 10, 2008 1:46 AM | Reply | Permalink
Glad's post was a snark?
April 10, 2008 2:14 AM | Reply | Permalink
The post isn't subtle, but its meta-ness is.
Also, what kind of sicko wants to see babies fight?? What are you gonna do, glue razor blades to our fingers? I'm only two months old and already this world is too sick to live in. Waaaaa!
April 10, 2008 1:03 AM | Reply | Permalink
I try not to pick on babies smaller than me... unless they are hapless Obama supporters who clearly lack the older, more sophisticated perspective I bring to the table.
April 10, 2008 5:31 PM | Reply | Permalink
Did you hear that Allsburg? That, my friend, was a challenge. If you have any pride, do not take that lying down.
April 10, 2008 5:41 PM | Reply | Permalink
Careful, elliot...This baby's got razor blades on his fingers. Genghis stuck them there with Superglue. Now every time I try to suck my thump, I cut myself.
Damn you Genghis!
April 10, 2008 6:47 PM | Reply | Permalink
Also, speaking of the "recommended" list, please everybody recommend this post:
http://tpmcafe.talkingpointsmemo.com/talk/2008/04/howard-dean-the-clintons-lanny-1.php
It would be amusing to see it topping the charts.
April 10, 2008 1:05 AM | Reply | Permalink
Done.
April 10, 2008 1:13 AM | Reply | Permalink
I've read that post 3 times now and cracked up every time. It's funnier than baby-fighting.
PS Billy Glad has made the recommended list.
April 10, 2008 1:15 AM | Reply | Permalink
Mission Accomplished.
April 10, 2008 4:19 PM | Reply | Permalink
Prince had Kirstie Ally on an album!
Prince can be the Pope.
April 10, 2008 12:41 AM | Reply | Permalink
jayeebus! You can have one of Mitt's silver medals for cruelty.
Poor Billy. He was speaking from the heart.
April 10, 2008 1:01 AM | Reply | Permalink
PS
I prefer Kanye West or Jayzee.
April 10, 2008 1:02 AM | Reply | Permalink
To me, Prince and the Revolution were about hope and change. And, for me, they delivered. They made America a better place to dance and sing songs about self-stimulation.
hmmm.
And still I looked to Prince to turn the tide.
Oy.
I really believed that Prince would die. He would die 4 U. Darling if you want him to. U. He would die 4 U.
I hear that he's still partying like it’s 1999.
Because to me, even after he got rid of Wendy, Lisa, and yes, the Revolution, Prince is still my Revolution.
Laughing.
(You might try this)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cN7Unxd8tpM&feature=related
April 10, 2008 2:04 AM | Reply | Permalink
You say you want a revolution.
Well, you know, you gotta free your mind instead.
And everything's gonna be, alright.
April 10, 2008 2:04 AM | Reply | Permalink
So, this is what it sounds like, when doves cry.
April 10, 2008 2:36 AM | Reply | Permalink
Prince is a flat-out f*cking genius.Michael ain't fit to carry His Royal Purple Badness'guitar.I'll quote my 78 yr-old mother who made this comment after Theartistformerlyknownasprincebutnowonceagainknownasprince appeared on the Grammys a few years back;"Those other punks should know better than to get on the same stage as that man.How dare they?" Full Disclosure; Mom's pretty f*ckin cool and even went to see Iggy Pop w/me in 82.
April 10, 2008 4:27 AM | Reply | Permalink
Bet you haven't heard The Teaches of Peaches!
April 10, 2008 5:07 AM | Reply | Permalink
Wow, Qwerty! Just... Wow...
This is the last place I expected to see someone extolling the *ahem* virtues of Peaches.
April 10, 2008 1:18 PM | Reply | Permalink
The song that goes "f*ck McCain away, f*ck McCain away" is getting more ipod time these days. :) Finally someone who listens to some music of this century....
April 10, 2008 2:52 PM | Reply | Permalink
We've got results from early exit polls. Hillary has a slight edge with 17 recommendations to Prince's 15. But that's within the margin of error, so it's still too close to call. Hillary is doing well among old-timers, trolls, and Billy Glad fans, whereas Prince is winning the snark vote and among people who genuinely love Prince. Developing...
April 10, 2008 9:25 AM | Reply | Permalink
I should add that dark horse, "Dear Howard Dean", has pulled out ahead of both contenders with 19.
April 10, 2008 9:26 AM | Reply | Permalink
Partial List Of Favorite PRINCE songs by both candidates
Hillary's Price Jams:
Baby I'm A Star
All The Critics Love You In New York
Lady Cab Driver
Possessed
Diamonds And Pearls
Gotta A Broken Heart Again
Old Friends 4 Sale
Somebody's Somebody
Face Down
You're Always In My Hair
Gotta Stop Messin' About
Shockadelica
Controversy
Billy Jack Bitch
Circle Of Amour
Animal Kingdom
Acknowledge Me
Man'O War
Dig U Better Dead
Sexual Suicide
Welcome To The Rat Race
Irresistible Bitch
Strange Relationship
Let's Go Crazy
Another Lonely Christmas
Obama's Top Prince Jams:
The Beautiful Ones
Money Don't Matter Tonight
When Will We Be Paid?
America
7
Adore
In All My Dreams
Ronnie Talk To Russia
The Cross
Letitgo
Mr. Happy
Emancipation
U Got The Look
The Ladder
An Honest Man
Soul Sanctuary
Strays Of The World
I Wish You Heaven
Welcome To The Dawn
Joy In Repetition
Power Fantastic
The Word
Rainbow Children
Mellow
Girls and Boys
Get On The Boat
New Position
Right The Wrong
Dr. Mr Man
Shhh
We March
Sometimes It Snows In April
Everlasting Now
Rave Un2 The joy Fantastic
New Power Soul
Play In The Sunshine
Black Sweat
Life Can Be So Nice
The Future
April 10, 2008 9:28 AM | Reply | Permalink
Bionic Soy, the juxtaposition of Hillary Clinton and Lady Cab Driver is truly disturbing.
Maybe all of the Prince songs with audible sex are really Bill Clinton songs? But that list is too long, it would bring down the TPM server.
April 10, 2008 11:45 AM | Reply | Permalink
Agreed. On that note, being mindful of "Slick Willy" Bill Clinton, I allocate the following songs to Hillary.
Papa
When You Were Mine
International Lover
Do U Lie?
Horny Toad
Anotherloverholenyohead
The Greatest Romance Ever Sold
Do Me Baby
and ...
(Sheila E drum roll please)
... Dirty Mind.
AND
... (another drum roll)
How Come You Don't Call Me Anymore.
April 10, 2008 12:58 PM | Reply | Permalink
I just recommended this one. I like a fair fight.
April 10, 2008 9:35 AM | Reply | Permalink
Actually, we're both being knocked in by a concern troll political science class project. How's that for a humbling experience? I didn't come back through time for that.
April 10, 2008 9:39 AM | Reply | Permalink
As you know better thank anyone Billy, trolls are part man, part machine. Underneath, a hyper-alloy combat chassis - microprocessor-controlled, fully armored.
Very tough.
Heading over to your post to click ye old recommend button.
April 10, 2008 12:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
Yeah. The 600 series had rubber skin. We spotted them easy. But these are new, they look human. Sweat, bad breath, everything. Very hard to spot. I have to wait till they move on Hillary before I can zero them.
April 10, 2008 5:24 PM | Reply | Permalink
Opps.
Housequake for OBAMA
April 10, 2008 9:46 AM | Reply | Permalink
Shut up already... DAMN!
;-)
April 10, 2008 3:49 PM | Reply | Permalink
Game. Blouses.
April 10, 2008 9:58 AM | Reply | Permalink
Would anyone like some pancakes?
April 10, 2008 1:20 PM | Reply | Permalink
powerful stuff. you don't know how many relationships have been destroyed by the MJ/Prince divide. or maybe you do.
it's like bill murray said in "what about bob?"
Dr. Leo Marvin: Are you married?
Bob Wiley: I'm divorced.
Dr. Leo Marvin: Would you like to talk about that?
Bob Wiley: There are two types of people in this world: Those who like Neil Diamond, and those who don't. My ex-wife loves him.
Dr. Leo Marvin: So what you're saying is that even though you are an almost-paralyzed, multiphobic personality who is in a constant state of panic, your wife did not leave you, you left her because she loves Neil Diamond?
April 10, 2008 10:43 AM | Reply | Permalink
Ric Ocasek, you are like the Chris Dodd of this battle. Thanks for your commentary.
April 10, 2008 11:42 AM | Reply | Permalink
Have you ever noticed how Chris Dodd's sentences are never-ending parentheticals?
A Human Being: Let's order a pizza.
Dodd: In terms of the way forward, whether we will, all of us, together, find a common place to eat (whether it be a restaurant, a picnic, possibly on a picnic table, or, provided it is not tattered and we can find a suitably flat surface [not ideally flat, or too flat to take away the comfort that a group of friends can share sitting, together, on the grass, or on a beach] for a large picnic blanket, necessarily bringing a basket filled with all manner of mutually agreeable food and condiments, both prepared and otherwise), or whether we will, either by previous grocery purchases-- perhaps perishables languishing in our refrigerator, or frozen foods we have long forgotten-- or a brief trip to the grocery store (though it would take time, and I am not sure my constituents can wait, with their respective hungers unsated, for both the purchasing and the preparing of said purchases) engage into a fitting accommodation for all parties; I propose, as others have proposed (and I believe, many already agree), that it would be simplest, and best, for us, together, not to leave our home but rather to stay in it, and order, either from a nationally regarded (or disregarded) franchise such as Papa John's or Domino's, or from a nice little place (which some refer to as "the next place") such as Tre Amici (where I believe their ingredients are very fresh, and the family itself is Italian), and, as I said, order, to be delivered (and, as many of you have suggested, divided into not just halves, but quarters of differing ingredients, so as to provide the greatest possibly diversity, while also ensuring that we are, in the fullest sense, dining together) not just one, but several, not exceeding 10, pizzas.
April 10, 2008 3:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
lbp, you really gotta start writing your own posts. I do believe that you could outsnark me.
April 10, 2008 5:39 PM | Reply | Permalink
Definitely should go up as a post the next time Dodd turns up around here. Don't lose it.
April 10, 2008 5:45 PM | Reply | Permalink
Where would that leave Milli Vanilli???
April 10, 2008 11:47 AM | Reply | Permalink
Milli Vanilli, by lip synching, was merely borrowing notes, a common practice in the recording industry acknowledged by all to be morally neutral.
April 10, 2008 11:56 AM | Reply | Permalink
As an inspiration to the Obama campaign.
April 10, 2008 11:56 AM | Reply | Permalink
Well given that one of them is dead...
April 10, 2008 5:30 PM | Reply | Permalink
It can't be cause they sang "Girl you know it's true" so there!
April 10, 2008 12:12 PM | Reply | Permalink
Update: Prince Revolution (33 recs) has surged ahead of both Hillary Revolution (23 recs) and Dear Howard Dean (29 recs). At this point, while it's still theoretically possible for HR to come back, the math is against it. But HR is a fighter, and it refuses to concede. Pundits have suggested that it's angling to join forces with DHD to oust PR in a brokered convention this evening.
HR-DHD 2008!!!!
April 10, 2008 12:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
Wow!!! Big news in the horse race. I was just over at Muckraker. Hillary Revolution is dominating the recommended list over there. Apparently, Billy Glad, in clear violation of TPM rules, checked the Muckraker box when he submitted HR even though it's an election post. Now HR is arguing that Muckraker is being disenfranchised and that the recommendations should be counted even though PR and DHD are not even in the running over there. Asked to comment, PR and DHD have indicated that they're open to a revote on Muckraker, provided that a fair vote can be guaranteed. This requirement will probably doom any revote because computer scientists have already demonstrated that the electronic voting technology employed by TPM is subject to manipulation. Josh Marshall is trying to find a to get the Muckraker vote counted in a manner that will be satisfactory to all parties.
Developing...
April 10, 2008 12:58 PM | Reply | Permalink
Another big development. DHD has an earlier twin which just joined the recommendation list. The combined scores of both posts would easily put it in the lead. PR and HR have both protested to TPM officials, and there are unsubstantiated rumors that they have each prepared their own twins to compete with DHD. DHD, meanwhile, has vowed to fight this to the bitter end and says that it's prepared to reproduce itself thousands of times if PR and HR proceed with their plans.
April 10, 2008 1:09 PM | Reply | Permalink
It's not fair to count both DHD posts. That's why there won't be a re-vote in Michigan. A vote in one should disqualify the voter from a second slice of the pie...
April 10, 2008 1:22 PM | Reply | Permalink
Glad should withdraw his post. It's been parked in the mid-twenties all day, and this post is near 40. Plus, as more people recommend this post, there's a bandwagon effect, that makes it illegitimate to attempt to compete with it any further. We need the users of this site -- the elders of it -- to come together in unity.
Billy Glad's post should be withdrawn.
He has every right to continue with it, but little reason to.
April 10, 2008 1:53 PM | Reply | Permalink
articleman, these smug demands for HR's concession will only serve energize it's base. This one is going all the way to the 24-hour cutoff.
April 10, 2008 1:57 PM | Reply | Permalink
I have 10 more I'd withdraw if I could.
April 10, 2008 5:27 PM | Reply | Permalink
Count the comments. Admittedly, many of my comments are my own, but I believe comments should count.
April 10, 2008 5:47 PM | Reply | Permalink
Billy, this is a race about recommends. Before the results were in, you said so. Now you want to make this a race about comments. It's not a race about comments, it's always been about the recommends.
Winning comments but losing recommends is no way to determine the best post. It only implies that the author is controversial, and has high negatives. We can't keep picking the best post on the basis of who has more comments, and higher negatives. It's bad for the site.
For the collective good, admit it's about recommends. And quit trying to persuade my recommenders to turn against me. They're pledged, through the end of the 24 hour cycle.
April 10, 2008 7:00 PM | Reply | Permalink
Now THAT is funny.
April 10, 2008 7:59 PM | Reply | Permalink
A meta-post parodying a post that was as much performance art as politics, followed by meta-comments about the metaness of the meta-post, a brief interlude of comments that embrace the metaness of the post and make it their own, then a series of comments about trolling that take the metadom to the third power.
And then I do a comment about the logrithmic metaness of it all.
I really don't know if I want to laugh, applaud or go knock back a couple of aspirin with straight bourbon.
April 10, 2008 5:15 PM | Reply | Permalink
If I ever need to get out of the k-hole that is this echo chamber, I'm going to ask you to lead me out.
April 10, 2008 5:30 PM | Reply | Permalink
Now you're just trying to boost your google ranking for "echo chamber".
April 10, 2008 5:37 PM | Reply | Permalink
When in doubt, go with bourbon.
April 10, 2008 5:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
Help: TPM staff publishes only a few lines of my blogs
I tried unsuccessfully four times to get TPM staff to address the problem I’m having with my blogs. Only a few lines of them get published, and when a MORE hyperlink does appear, it goes back to the few lines. I can never get to the entire piece in each blog. This was especially vexing when I achieved Recommended Reader Blog status and notified all my friends and relatives.
In frustration, I’m putting this notice up in every conceivable spot at TPM that I can. Help! I’m trapped in TPM Hell. User name: johnhughmcfadden; email: johnhughmcfadden@hotmail.com
April 10, 2008 6:00 PM | Reply | Permalink
If you cut and paste, your post may drop all but the first paragraph. You may have to re-type some things. Hope that helps.
April 10, 2008 6:37 PM | Reply | Permalink
You, sir, have a kind of genius.
Every time I read this I laugh harder.
April 10, 2008 6:48 PM | Reply | Permalink
God bless you, HusseinTenaX.
Like "Kiss," this post only hit #2 on the charts, but there's always the hope that the next day's post is "U Got the Look," or at least that 1988 Sheena Easton is looking at me lewdly in a video, either of which would be fine with me right about now.
April 10, 2008 6:57 PM | Reply | Permalink
Am I the only one who has noticed that Hillary gets to be Prince while Obama is relegated to the role of Ewwwww Michael Jackson? If you had made Obama Prince instead, you would have gone off the charts. Freud says there are no accidents.
April 10, 2008 8:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
You know, I was going to recommend this post, but then I realized that Prince has had a long association with the notorious Morris Day and the Time. Day is a known racist, having said, "White folks, U'r much too tight," and anti-american, urging everyone to "Pledge Allegiance 2 the Time."
I was shocked, shocked. Prince claimed never to have heard those comments as he was not at First Avenue, plus he only wants to see me laughing in the purple rain. I don't know what that means.
So, I am going to stick with Michael Jackson, because there's nothing remotely funny about him at all. Plus, he's friends with that nice monkey.
April 10, 2008 8:11 PM | Reply | Permalink
Freud also said sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, but this is of course not true in the hypersexual hands of Prince, nor in the hands of those revolutionary Clintons.
April 10, 2008 8:39 PM | Reply | Permalink
You're one of those! How funny.
April 11, 2008 7:30 AM | Reply | Permalink
I'd recommend it, but I think George Clinton would make that funk the Pfunk.
April 10, 2008 9:01 PM | Reply | Permalink
What you should do is go find Snoop Dogg's video for his song "Sensual Seduction." His take on Prince is pretty priceless. But where he goes from there is even better.
honest.
April 10, 2008 9:01 PM | Reply | Permalink
What the Hey. I'll recommend it anyway
April 10, 2008 9:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
I figured that this post would trail off, but it got funnier. I just logged in to note the final tally. The networks have called this race for Dear Howard Dean, with 72 recommendations and climbing by the minute, a landslide. This is a historic victory. Never have so few words been recommended so many times. Our statisticians have determined that each word has been recommended approximately 24 times, shattering the previous record of .08 rpw. This is also the first time that two identical posts have made the recommended list.
In second place, meta-post Prince Revolution has soundly defeated its subject, Hillary Revolution, 51-33 at the last count. This is certainly excellent news...for Hillary.
April 10, 2008 9:35 PM | Reply | Permalink
Obama/Prince '08. Now that's a great ticket.
April 10, 2008 9:53 PM | Reply | Permalink
Post a Comment