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I believe in the American flag!
Evidently this is something that one needs to establish with certainty
if one wishes to run for president, so I thought that I would just get
out ahead of the curve here in preparation for my candidacy in 2016 and
say that I believe in the American flag. I have seen it with my
own eyes and will swear on a stack of Bibles that it exists.
I also believe in mom, the flag (well, that is redundant I suppose,
given the first paragraph) and apple pie - somewhere between 32% and
56% more than my opponents believe in those things. And Jesus
really is my co-pilot (seriously, Jesus Moreno down the street and I carpool together all the time).
All right, I hope that is settled now. When Charles Gibson cuts
to the videotaped question (or hologram, or whatever they are using at
that distant date in the future), I am going to reference this blog
post, and I hope that all of you will call in to back me up - Greg
DeLassus believes in the American flag, and all of that other jazz.
Comments (7)
You hint at an interesting and non-trivial issue: What it means to say that one believes in something. I remember being a child in church having to repeat the creed that I believed in God the father, God the son, and God the holy ghost. Indeed, the words from my mouth were strange as I had no idea what they meant, especially the part about the holy ghost. Similarly, I don't know what it means to say that one believes in the flag. I suppose that one is making a claim about believing something about what the flag represents, but obviously it represents different things to different folk. I don't believe in the flag that represents unbridled American military and economic power applied without regard to the rights of those of the receiving end. I do believe in the flag that represents our best tendencies of proclaiming that all men are created equal. I suggest that when we are asked whether we believe in the flag that was ask which notion the questioner has in mind in posing the question. Only then could I give a reasoned answer.
April 17, 2008 7:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
By the way, the notion that all men are created equal includes those people who are not American. That's a notion of America and its flag that I support.
April 17, 2008 7:34 PM | Reply | Permalink
Your opponents will claim it was only a speech you wrote.
April 17, 2008 7:36 PM | Reply | Permalink
Yes this American flag flap is nonsense. But its Obama that made it an issue. He decided to announce he wasn't going to wear a flag pin after 9/11. He made the connections to wearing a flag pin to false patriotism and decided he would prove his patriotism in other ways. Well if he wants to make an issue of it he really can't expect other people to not make an issue of it. It was his stupid move the precipitated all this silliness.
April 17, 2008 8:04 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hilarious.
April 17, 2008 8:36 PM | Reply | Permalink
I believe in the American flag.
I believe you have the right to fly it upside down to signify a nation in distress. I believe you have the right to spit on the flag as a sign of protest. I believe you can sew flags together to make a nifty pair of pants or a shirt or a daishiki or a hat or a vest or purse. I believe you can eat off the flag at your Fourth of July picnic. I believe you have the right to stick flags on the front or rear or off the trunk or tailgate of your car or truck and drive through town honking your horn in the middle of the night.
I believe you have the right to swaddle your baby in the flag to keep him or her warm at night. And I believe you have the right to cover your baby's casket with the flag when he or she comes home from war, dead from real sniper fire not imagined; dead from real bombs not silly made up song lyrics.
And I believe you have the right to burn that flag -- incinerate it, torch it, vaporize it -- if you are bitter about your baby's senseless and unnecessary loss of life in a shameful, senseless and unnecessary war.
April 17, 2008 9:30 PM | Reply | Permalink
I am distressed to see that only two folks responded to this post as if it were a joke (which it was). I am also disappointed to see that only two folks clicked the recommend. Come on folks, help a fellow out here...
April 17, 2008 11:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
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