Fake Sinbad,

I don't doubt your sincerity in running for president, and I don't mind that you've vacillated in your choice of running mates.  I know that Sinbad loves America, and wants to lead America forward.  I know that Sinbad cares about the children, and a better future, and the environment.  I know that Sinbad can handle a corkscrew landing, and I know that Sinbad will protect us all from sniper fire when we're in  Bosnia.  And most importantly, I know that Sinbad wants to help us all devise the correct policy on whether we should eat here or at the next place, where there might be sushi.

We don't need to know whether Sinbad will tell us the truth or not - he's already exposed one of the most powerful women in America as a liar, and that takes guts.  We don't need to know whether Sinbad passes a CiC test - he's proven that in <a href="http://tpmcafe.talkingpointsmemo.com/talk/2008/03/sinbad-will-not-pipe-down.php"> Kosovo. </a> And we don't need to know
whether Sinbad will improve our image abroad - he's proven that with his Hammerpants.

Fake Sinbad, what we need to know, what America needs to know, is the anwer to a very important question.  Or, more precisely, two questions.  They are questions that have been asked about politicians in the past, by both the media and ordinary people.  They are questions that have been asked about Barack Obama.  America needs to know whether you are black enough.  Sinbad, are you black enough?

Are you black enough to be taken credibly by the African American community?  Have you proven that you truly represent this constituency?  Would Tavis Smiley invite you on his show and treat you as if you had credibility?

America also needs to know whether or not you are too black.  Sinbad, are you too black?

Are you an Al Sharpton, a Jesse Jackson?  Are you even a David Paterson?  Is America really ready for an election season with not 1 but 2 viable black candidates for president?

In short, will you be able to unite both white America and black America under your banner?

I hope you'll respond thoughtfully on these questions.  I also hope I haven't frayed any nerves with my bluntness.  After the seminal speech by Barack Obama a couple of weeks ago, it is a good time to be talking about race.  Since you're running, I think it's only fair for America to know if and how you intend to play the race card.

(No offense intended to anyone of any race.  Just some election satire.  I mean, sheesh, can you believe they bothered Barack Obama with inanities like this??)