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From The Deck Of The U.S.S. Clinton

The U.S.S Clinton almost foundered in the Potomac tonight after being mauled by a powerful armada led by the U.S.S. Obama. Becalmed in the Potomac, the Clinton withstood merciless broadsides from the Obama and lesser vessels for almost 12 hours today. There were reports that journalists in small boats and submarines made several attempts to drill holes in the hull of the Clinton below the waterline. The extent of that damage has not been determined. The decks of the Clinton were strewn with dead and wounded. Women tended the wounds of the old people and working poor, who, along with women, make up most of the Clinton's crew. Along the banks of the Potomac, merriment broke out as the Obama landed just miles from the White House. Music and celebration filled the air as the smiling Captain greeted a dancing crowd of admirers. As old men in row boats struggled to tow the Clinton into a bank of dense fog, her Captain stood alone at the wheel, willing her ship down river to Chesapeake Bay in search of a fair wind. On the shore, the revelers lifted their glasses high and jeered as the lanterns on the stern of the listing frigate slowly faded from their sight.


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